Kathy Nicholson

The last few days have been really rough. Truthfully, this past week has been one of the hardest stretches I’ve had in a while. I’ve lost 18 pounds in a little over a week, and my body is telling me very clearly that I have to slow down. I’ve made the decision to take this entire week off from work, and I’ll reevaluate when I’m strong enough to return. Y’all know how much I love my job. Being on the radio brings me so much joy, but right now I have to give my body a chance to rest, recover and get stronger. This time away from work will be unpaid, and of course that’s scary—but I simply can’t let that be my focus right now. God has proven Himself faithful over and over again. He has provided for me in ways I never could have imagined, and so many times He has chosen to do it through you. Your gifts. Your prayers. Your letters. Your comments. Your encouragement. Every little act of love matters more than you know. You are helping me survive some of the darkest days of my life while still finding reasons to smile. And please hear this part: I am still joyful. I may be weak. I may be tired. My body may be fighting harder than ever. But I am still here. I am still loving my family. I am still laughing. I am still seeing God move. And I am still getting to witness beautiful things in the lives of the people I love. So please keep praying for me. Pray that this week of rest gives my body what it desperately needs. Pray for strength, nourishment and healing as I prepare for what comes next. I don’t know exactly what tomorrow holds, but I know Who holds me. And He has not failed me yet. Thank you for helping carry me when I don’t have the strength to carry myself

Tomorrow I will undergo the mapping procedure for my upcoming Y-90 treatment. During the mapping, the interventional radiologist will enter the radial artery at my wrist and guide a thin catheter through my arteries to the hepatic artery and the specific branch supplying the area of my liver they need to treat. This mapping is an important step in making sure the Y-90 radiation can be delivered safely and precisely to the cancer. I would be less than truthful if I said I wasn’t nervous. I am. I’m praying that everything goes exactly as it should during the procedure and that the mapping shows I am a good candidate to move forward with the actual Y-90 treatment. I’m also concerned about the fatigue. I’m already carrying a significant amount of fatigue from everything my body has been through, and this procedure—and eventually the Y-90 treatment itself—may add to it. I’m also thinking about what recovery will look like at home. I may need some extra help and care while my body recovers. And then there is the financial side of this journey. I have already used my 10 paid days off from work for the year, so every additional day I have to miss because of treatment or recovery means lost income. I don’t share that to complain. I share it because so many of you have chosen to walk this road with me, and I want you to know where I am and what the next step looks like. Your prayers, encouragement, practical help, and financial support have carried me through some very difficult days. Tomorrow, I will put my wrist in the hands of the medical team and put everything else in the hands of God. I’m asking you to pray specifically that the mapping is successful, that there are no complications, that my body tolerates the procedure well, and that God provides the strength, care, and finances I need during recovery. I don’t know exactly what the next few weeks will hold, but I know Who will be there with me. Thank you for continuing to pray, give, encourage, and walk beside me. Every prayer, every message, every meal, every helping hand, and every gift means more than I can adequately put into words. One step at a time. Tomorrow, we map the way forward. Today it's fluids to build me up for tomorrow. But first a few more hours of sleep... I hope. Prayers Please.

I just finished what was probably one of the hardest days I’ve had in a very long time. My day began with pain, weakness and a level of fatigue that is difficult to put into words. I wasn’t completely unable to get around, but I was wobbly enough that I needed help getting from one place to another. And somehow, I had to gather enough strength to go to work tonight and engineer a live racing show. To add another hurdle, we have brand-new software at the station, and I had only operated it once before tonight. But we made it through! The adrenaline and excitement of the show kicked in, and for a couple of hours, I was doing something I love. I am so thankful for my job. It gives me purpose. It gives me something to look forward to. And on days like today, it gives me another reason to keep pushing forward. God also knew exactly what I needed throughout the day. Messages came from several people telling me they were praying for me, and my bestie Mary Beth showed up with a salmon BLT that absolutely hit the spot. Sometimes God’s provision looks like a prayer. Sometimes it looks like an encouraging message. And sometimes it looks like your best friend walking through the door carrying lunch. Wednesday is another important step in this journey. I will undergo the mapping procedure for Y-90 treatment to determine whether they can safely deliver a significant dose of radiation directly into the part of my liver that needs treatment. If the mapping goes as hoped and I qualify, the actual treatment will follow in the coming weeks. I believe this opportunity is an answer to prayer. But answers to prayer don’t always mean an easy road. One of my biggest concerns right now is the fatigue. I wish I could adequately explain how serious it has become. This isn’t ordinary tiredness. It is a weakness and exhaustion unlike anything I have ever experienced, and I know the upcoming procedures and treatment may mean that I simply won’t be able to work for a few days—or perhaps longer. But tonight, after one of the hardest days, I can still say this: God has been faithful. I haven’t had much energy to be on Facebook lately other than occasionally checking messages and prayer requests. So please don’t mistake my quietness for improvement or for needing less support. Actually, the opposite is true. If you don’t hear from me, please keep praying. Please keep checking on me. Please keep believing with me. Your encouragement, prayers, love and support are especially important right now, even when I don’t have enough strength to respond. I’m taking this journey one day at a time—and some days, one hour at a time. Tonight I’m tired. I’m hurting. But I’m also grateful. And I’m still here. “My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness.” — 2 Corinthians 12:9 Thank you for continuing to walk beside me.

What the Picture Doesn’t Show I had two days of renewed energy this weekend, and it was fantastic. For a little while, I felt more like myself again. Then Sunday morning came and—BOOM—my body said, retreat. You may look at these pictures and see someone who looks strong. And spiritually, I am. My faith is strong. My hope is still strong. But what the picture doesn’t show is that today my body was trembling with weakness, and I was dealing with more pain than usual. Cancer has taught me that you can smile and still be hurting. You can put on your makeup, fix your hair, go to church, go to work—and still be fighting a battle with every step. I am so thankful for the people at my church who recognize when I’m struggling and quietly step in to help. And especially for my son Andrew. There was something so precious about having my grown son put his strong arm around me and steady me as I went up and down the steps to play the piano and sing. He wasn’t embarrassed by my weakness. He simply protected his mama. I was able to work today, too, and I’m incredibly grateful for the management at the station who continue to accommodate me and make it possible for me to keep doing a job I love while my body fights this battle. Oh, how I long for the day when I hear the doctor say, “We’re in a good place. You are cancer free.” But God is also in the waiting. This season is physically exhausting. Emotionally exhausting. Financially exhausting. Yet somehow, even here, God continues to draw me closer to Christ and allows me to see so much goodness in the people around me. And maybe one of the greatest things this journey is teaching me is what I want to do when I am stronger: I want to be the person who notices someone else’s weakness and steps in to meet their need. Today I needed strong arms around me. Someday, I pray these arms will be strong enough again to hold somebody else up. Until then, I’m still smiling. Still working. Still worshiping. Still believing. The picture may show strength. The trembling reminds me where my strength really comes from. REMEMBER HE IS WITH YOU TOO! He sees you, and desires for you to call on Him in all seasons!

For more than two years now, God has used people to help carry me through this journey of surviving cancer. I want to share something that has been difficult for me to admit. There have been so many days when needing help has made me feel less than. I have had to ask because the needs were real and I simply could not meet them on my own. But the hardest part has never been the people around me. You have been generous, compassionate and loving. The struggle has been within me. And I am beginning to understand that God has been using even that struggle to teach me something I desperately needed to learn. Being forced to depend on others has shown me what complete dependence really looks like—and it has pointed me toward the kind of abandonment and surrender I need to have with God. I have nothing apart from Him. None of us do. There is a humility in admitting, I cannot do this by myself. And perhaps one of the greatest lessons of this journey has been learning that I was never meant to. Every meal, every gift, every prayer, every dollar, every ride, every message and every act of kindness has reminded me that God often answers our prayers through the hands of other people. Some of you have given sacrificially. You may have thought you were simply helping me survive another difficult day, but God has used you to teach me an even deeper lesson about trusting Him completely. For that lesson, I am profoundly grateful. And for every person who has helped me, prayed for me, encouraged me or given to me, I pray for you. My heart rests in trusting God to show His favor and goodness toward those who have so generously shown His love and favor toward me. Thank you for helping carry me. Thank you for allowing God to use you. And thank you for teaching me, through your generosity, that needing others doesn’t make me less. Sometimes it simply gives us the opportunity to discover just how faithfully God provides.

I haven’t posted a financial update in a little while, but tonight I need to be transparent. It has been nine days since my last contribution, and my funds are very low. I've had double the copays and gas costs this month because of a pretty painful allergic response to a sulfa drug. Several of the meds needed were not covered by insurance. I am incredibly grateful for every person who has helped carry me through this cancer journey. Your gifts have helped with gas, medications, food, household expenses, medical trips and all the everyday bills that continue even while I’m fighting. I’m still working as much as I’m physically able because I love my job and I want to continue providing for myself. But cancer has changed what I’m able to do, while adding expenses I never planned for. Right now I am preparing for the next phase of treatment, including the Y-90 procedure for the portion of my liver the HAI pump cannot effectively reach. My doctors are continuing to fight this disease aggressively, and I am continuing to fight right alongside them. If you’ve been thinking about helping, this would be a particularly helpful time. Even $10, $20 or $25 adds up when several people join together. And if giving isn’t possible, sharing this fundraiser and praying for me means more than you know. I have come too far to stop believing now. I’m still here. I’m still working. I’m still fighting. And I am still trusting God one day at a time. Thank you for helping me keep going

UPDATE: KEEPING THE FAITH AND MOVING FORWARD I wanted to give everyone an update on where things stand in my cancer journey. There is good news to share. I am responding to treatment, and we are seeing encouraging results from the HAI pump and chemotherapy. My doctors have even reduced some of my chemotherapy doses because of the side effects while continuing to fight this cancer aggressively. The challenge is that the HAI pump cannot adequately reach one section of my liver where there is still a significant tumor. Because of that, the next step is Y-90 treatment, a targeted radiation procedure designed to attack that area of the liver. I’ll first go through the mapping procedure, followed by the actual Y-90 treatment. Physically, this journey continues to take a toll. The diarrhea and digestive issues have been difficult, my hands and feet are still healing from a severe medication reaction, my mouth has been painful, maintaining my weight has become a priority, and—as if cancer wasn’t enough—I recently learned that the arm I injured in my fall actually is fractured. So I’m sporting a new brace and adding that recovery to the list! But here’s what hasn’t changed: I’m still fighting. I’m still working when I can. I’m still laughing. I’m still trusting God. And I’m still incredibly grateful. Financially, the ongoing treatments, travel, medications, missed work, food and everyday expenses continue whether I feel good enough to work or not. That’s why this GoFundMe remains so important to me. If you are able to give, thank you from the bottom of my heart. If you can’t give right now, sharing this fundraiser helps tremendously. And your prayers, messages, calls and encouragement mean more than you know. I don’t know every turn this road is going to take, but I know I’m not walking it alone. One treatment. One procedure. One day at a time. “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding.” — Proverbs 3:5* Thank you for continuing to stand beside me. Love, Kathy