Lizly Ragland

February last year, I went back to the Philippines to attend my father’s funeral. After almost 8 years living in the US, I came back home, but not to have a vacation, but to see him for the last time. It was heartbreaking and very painful. I still cry whenever I think about it, but it’s something I can’t do anything about and need to live with… I have so many regrets for not going back early to see all of them, but money is tight. I’d rather send them money to give help because airplane tickets cost so much. But even if I’ve been helping my parents, I feel empty and lonely because of the fact that I didn’t even have the chance to say goodbye. When he got a heart attack, he was alone. It was a sudden death, and no one was there for him. When they knocked on his door and he didn’t answer, they checked him and found him on his bed. Everyone was shocked and panicked! I can’t imagine the pain my family felt, and whenever I think about it, it makes me cry. I told my sister that my dad mentioned when he was still alive that he wanted to be buried in his province in Bicol, Philippines. It was a place far away from Manila; it’s probably an 8 to 11-hour bus ride. She said she can’t bring him there because it’s going to cost so much with the transportation and funeral to be in the province. She and her husband decided to cremate dad’s body instead. And my mother brought my dad’s cremated ashes to her house. I still want to help fulfill my dad’s last wish to be with his parents’ side in the cemetery in the province. I know time will come and I’m going to be able to do that with your help! Thank you so much for listening and understanding! God bless everyone ✝️

A few years ago, my husband had surgery to remove his gallbladder. It was painful and worries me to this day. I thought it was the worst thing that could happen to him, to us as a family. But I was wrong because recently he was diagnosed with a kidney problem. For so long, his doctor kept telling him that his creatinine levels were getting higher and that’s an indication that he might be having a problem with his kidney function. Then one day, my husband decided to find out what’s going on. Our family doctor recommended a specialist for kidneys (nephrologist), and we like calling him the kidney doctor. Then we found out that he is indeed facing a problem with his kidney. It’s devastating and unbelievable, but it’s something we can’t ignore even if we want to… It was a life-changing discovery for our family, knowing every day that we can’t do anything about it breaks our hearts. I pray every day that my kidney matches his so that I can donate mine when the time comes for him to get a transplant. We are not there yet, but there is no guarantee about the future. Sometimes I think that there’s more to life and that it feels like we are just starting. We are not done yet because we have so many dreams, and our purpose still needs to be discovered as a family. We keep trying to be strong, but like others, we also reach that point where we need help and support. What they said is true that sometimes one problem can lead to another. I have so many sleepless nights because of our situation. Sometimes I wake up very tired because I can’t get enough sleep. But I keep reminding myself to be strong and keep going. And because I’m not getting enough sleep, I thought I needed to eat more to gain strength. While thinking that way, I gained weight too! My doctor gave me devastating news; she said that I’m already pre-diabetic. And if I’m not going to do something about it, then I will be a full-blown diabetic. It felt like someone poured cold water on me. It’s the moment that I thought I was taking care of myself, but I was wrong. All this time, because of our problematic situation, I lost grip of my health. I thought I was taking care of myself but didn’t know that I was already stress eating. For two years, I’ve undergone lifestyle changes to be healthy again. My husband is facing challenges already, and I can’t add to that factor. I need to be strong for him because he’s still doing everything he can to fulfill his responsibilities to our family. He’s hardworking, and he never runs away from his responsibilities. He is the kind of person who will still go to work even if he is sick (not because he can’t stay home for 2 weeks because of cough and cold) but because he is an amazing human being. He doesn’t mind making sacrifices for this family. His dedication is undeniable. His love is unmatched. He worked so hard. But I know that he needs help too! My daughter and I are always there for him. I’ve been teaching my daughter how to take care of her daddy just like how he takes care of us. Our sickness will not be a reason for us to give up on each other, but instead, it will be a reason for us to support one another. It makes us fight harder to live longer and be happier together. Life is indeed beautiful but unpredictable. Life can throw challenges at us, and it’s up to us to rise above them. Our humanity is teaching us to humble ourselves and help others whenever possible. And even if the world is changing, our human heart knows when to break for someone who needs it. Our compassion makes us realize that we need one another. Our empathy makes us feel their pain. I know that there are many good things in this world, and we can be an example of that… Thank you for listening and understanding! God bless you ✝️