Trigger warning: DV, SA.

Hello, my name is Sara. I am a single mom, a business owner, and a DVSA survivor.

I am asking for assistance with legal fees, rent, and other bills that I am behind on due to the lack of financial help from my son’s dad and the extremely high cost of living in Colorado, as well as my struggles with mental and physical health.

My story is long and traumatic, and feels inappropriate to share here, but for transparency purposes, in short:

His dad is 15 years older than me and got me pregnant against my will when I was 22 years old. Against my will meaning I never consented to pregnancy and asked that he used methods of protection, and he refused. He insisted he could not get me pregnant, implying that he had a vasectomy after having his 3 previous children with his ex-wife. I still asked that he used methods of protection for my physical health and he did not respect my wishes.

Upon finding out about my pregnancy, he admitted to intentionally doing so because he “wanted a swirl baby” (A bi-racial child.) He harassed me about my initial choice to terminate the pregnancy, exposing me to more abuse and neglect. I ultimately decided to keep my son which has been both the biggest blessing and struggle of my life.

He abused me physically, sexually, emotionally, and financially for years. His horrific lies and manipulations have affected my mental health severely. I was diagnosed with C-PTSD from the trauma that I endured by being with him. My close family and friends have suffered as well and witnessed my suffering for almost a decade now.

I had an opportunity to get full custody years ago, but agreed on joint custody with primary physical custody because I was terrified of him in more ways than one.

Eventually I was able to move out of New York State with my son, to Colorado, with the agreement that I would be financially responsible to get him back home tor school breaks and summertime. I did not feel this was fair due to the circumstances at hand, but I never expressed to the court that he was extremely abusive due to fear and threats/manipulations from him at the time, as well as lack of financial resources to take him to trial. I settled because I didn’t have the energy to continue fighting him.

I am asking for assistance now with lawyer fees to gain full custody in hopes of protecting my son and myself from further abuse. He has proven to us time and time again that he cannot be consistent with his efforts or financial help. I have not received child support for a month now, and this lack of effort has been consistent from day one with him. He rarely speaks to my son and they do not have a genuine relationship. He hasn’t spoken to him in months, my son is at the point where he has no interest in communicating with him regularly, mainly because they never have established that connection, due to his dads lack of efforts. I am ready to fight for my son and myself, and set boundaries that should’ve been set a long time ago.

Anyone that knows me knows how hard I work, but I feel like I’m constantly fighting an uphill battle without any assistance physically or financially. I am at the point of asking the public for help, which feels extremely painful and shameful because of my ego and pride.

With my business, Sense by Cin, I advocate for DVSA survivors and was donating monthly to DVSA organizations and other social justice programs. I had to put those donations on hold temporarily to get financial stability back above water. I am hoping by the grace of Goddess and the universe that I am able to survive this so I can continue to spread my light, story, and mission throughout the world.

Thank you in advance for your assistance and for hearing me and sharing my story.

Other ways to help/ donate:

Make a purchase on sensebycin.com to help expand my business, assisting with major home and work expenses.

Cashapp: $dashofcin

Venmo: $saralillieanna