Terras Recovery, A Chance at Life Again.

Im not sure where to start, as I want to convey all the sadness, the grief, trauma and hope I have felt loving and loosing my sister through her addiction, a task that seems impossible. So I will try to piece together the last 7 years as best as I can.

Im not sure how to tell you the story of loosing my big sister to drugs. Where I should begin is with the person, not the addiction. She is human, she is heart and soul and has always been somewhat of a Tiger. Beautiful and strong, brave and courageous.

Growing up I wanted to be her, I loved her darker hair, thick eyebrows and she was the most charismatic girl in most rooms.

We are a year apart. We would lie to kids at the pool or park and tell them we were twins, I was so proud she wanted to be a twin with me.

My father passed in 2000, unexpectedly. She was 15. I was 14, and our other sibling Kade was 12.

The day we had to go identify his body as next of kin , Kade and I couldn't gain composure in the room we were spoken to before we were led into the room with his body. Tera convinced us it was okay and important to say goodbye. My dad laid on the table in his clothing, looking like he was sleeping but he was ice cold. I wanted to touch him but I was scared.

My older sister said its okay and put her hand down and placed mine on top of hers.

She was my buffer. She was always my buffer.

Today I want to put my hand down first and hers on top. I want to make it safe for her.

Terra had her first son Grayson in 2011, February , she was the best mother, dancing around with her son, painting his room all cute, reading all the books etc. When I had my daughter 5 months later we were twins again with matching babies. I thought how wonderful to have my sister along this journey with me.

We both got pregnant with our second children around the same time, her son Emmett was born April 13, My daughter Liliana July 1. Again we were twinning with matching toddlers and babies .

The last time I remember feeling like that was then 7 years ago.

My sister injured her back and went in for some pain meds, they prescribed Oxy.

Within weeks she was addicted, her doctor stopped filling the prescription and this led her down a dark path of seeking out this drug on the street. No one knew what was going on with my sister she hid it well, the weight began to fall of her, she started talking and meeting new people that no one else knew. She left her old life slowly. Our birthdays are 3 days apart and so my mom treated us to a vacation in Mexico without our kids or husbands, My first ever sister trip.

This is the trip that opened my eyes to my sisters addiction. She wanted to drink first thing in the morning to the evening and I told her I couldn't keep up . I advised her to slow down and she got very angry and yelled at me and told me she was addicted to Oxy and she couldn't take her pills to Mexico so if she wasn't drunk she wouldn't be okay. I spent the next two days in bed upset as she stayed drinking so she didn't get sick.

I told my parents and we had numerous interventions with her, but the drugs had a tight grip on her. She would say yes to stopping and then change her mind. She lost her best friend to this behavior as her friend had to set a boundary that if she didn't get treatment she couldn't stand to see her ruin her life. She lost her relationship to the children's father, slowly the money an assets deteriorated as the drugs, like the leeches they are, ate everything in sight.

My sister lost primary custody of her two children last year, she then lost her home.

After that it got worse and this last few months she has been sleeping in her car, hotels, air bnb or anything to get by. My mom has been through hell letting her live with her and trying to pay off her debts anything she could but finally had to have a boundary and tell her she needed to go to rehab. Tera wasn't ready.

Having a family member who is an addict is the most painful thing Ive ever experienced.

Countless ER visits, car accidents, robberies and assaults' she has incurred. I'm sure I don't even know the half off it.

I have lost my sister over and over many times thinking it was the last time , I've seen her pass out in her vehicle, I've had to kick her out of my house because she brought drugs in it near my kids, I've seen the drugs take over the sweet, vivacious women and turn her angry, hostile and greedy. I've gotten calls from family and friends and spent many nights crying about my nephews, my sister and the loss of this twin. I spend as much time with her boys as I can but nothing can take away their pain but the return of their mother. She missed my wedding, has never met my step children and its been years since my kids have spent time with her. The last time I remember having a good time and bonding with my sister was the first day in Mexico, since then she has hidden in shame and guilt.

Many times my sister has wanted help in the last year, however treatment facilities in chilliwack are always full and wait listed, for an addict when they want help they need it now. Not in three weeks. We have tried everything you can name, outpatient, suboxanne treatments, but the addict needs to want health for themselves.

Her addiction has changed from Oxy to Cocaine, Cocaine to GHB, GHB to Meth and Meth to Fentanyl. Its a slippery slope from prescription to addiction. It can take anybody's child, anybody's mother, anybody's sister.

Since living on the streets my sister has talked a few times about changing, however these last two days she has been locked up in a Hotel room trying to come of the drugs herself which is so dangerous. I spoke to my sister an hour and a half ago about a plan, a plan to save her life. She told me she will do whatever it takes, that she is done with this life that just takes from you. She said she surrenders and no longer wants to be in control of the nightmare shes been living and wants to clean up and fight for her boys back.

Shes ready now. Today ...not in three weeks.

I told her I would drive up and pick her up from Chilliwack and bring her to irecover in Tees, Alberta. This is a place that will medically detox and has a two month in house intensive program for her we as a family have found a great place for my sisters treatment. Today is the start of her taking her life back.

www.irecover.ca

I am asking from the deepest part of my heart to help me make this private facility a possibility so I can save my sisters life. So my nephews have a mom, So I have my sister, So my mom gets to have her daughter, so the world gets to know my sister and doesn't remember her for her struggles.

Addicts are not addicts, they are people, people with problems and trauma, people with a disease. We shouldn't shame them and look away. If this was your family member would you go this far? Would you try until there is no trying anymore. No more pride, but instead with pure vulnerability as I ask you a friend of mine, an acquaintance, perhaps a stranger to help me provide this treatment for my sister and save her life.

We need more programs and options for our families and friends struggling with addiction. We need spaces, so many spaces for detox and recovery. We need to build better community and connect so people don't chose addiction when they really want and crave connection. My family and I give every chance in every way to others and today I humbly ask for your support in any amount you can.

Perhaps you haven't seen me in awhile and wanna have lunch and catch up, or coffee . Could you instead donate to this cause, and come to my home and allow me to pour you a cup and say thank you?

I have hope today like never before that I will see my sister in a home, with her boys again. I have hope that we can together make a difference in her life and that in return she and all those in my family will continue to heal and help others. Please donate to her if you have lost someone to addiction or have a family member struggling right now. I know when asked I would give my shirt off my back for anyone in need.

Thank you for listening to the story and the pain of trying to get my sister back. Thank you for contributing to this fundraiser.

I pray you all never have to endure the pain that addiction can bring upon.

Sincerly, Mandy Steckly

My sis and her oldest son Grayson.

Her Boys, Grayson and Emmett

My sister and I 5 years ago when she was kind of clean for a week.