Fund My Battle for My Children

Thank you for being here. My name is Shawn Christopher McClain, and I have not been allowed to see my daughter Izabella in 10 years.

From the day that she was born her mother attempted to erase me from her life. I had to take her to court multiple times to get visitation rights, to have my name legally added to her birth certificate as her father, to have the judge implement a 50/50 custody schedule in which I kept Izabella from Friday to Monday of every week. It was a contentious (and extremely expensive) process, but at the time Izabella was my only child, and being in her life at all was more than worth it.

But the worst blow came during my divorce. (For context, I was never married to Izabella’s mother. After Izabella was born, I met and eventually married a different woman. This is who the divorce proceedings involved.) This divorce was also deeply contested. My ex-wife, who had become friends with Izabella’s mother during our marriage, lied to the judges claiming I was physically abusive, even going so far as to claim I abused my own daughter. Since the narrative was now two-against-one, my visitation rights were completely stripped.

I want to be emphatic about this point: I am not abusive, and have never hurt any of my partners, and especially never hurt either of my children.

Years later, my son, Christopher, was born. His mother and I have a friendly and reciprocal 50/50 parenting plan with him, and between myself, my family, and his mother, he is very well cared for. His mother is even willing to be a character witness on my behalf to the court once I can afford to go back. However, I am ultimately responsible for Christopher’s medical bills because I am the one providing the health insurance through my job, and even with the support system he has, it is still not enough to cover everything. When he was four years old, he began experiencing seizures, which were extremely frightening and difficult to handle, especially for him. Thankfully, his condition is now well managed, but this requires frequent visits to both the pediatrician and the pediatric neurologist to ensure his continued well-being. Even with the best tier of health insurance I can afford through my job, I still owe thousands out of pocket. For example, a single EEG for him cost me $700, and he has had more than one since his seizures began. This might once have been feasible for me to afford--- painful on the wallet, but not impossible.

That is, until my child support was raised.

We (Izabella’s mother and I) have not had a review of our child support agreement since 2016 --- her mother initiated a review of the amount, and my monthly due went from $300, to over $1000. Because I have been successful in my career, they are calculating what I owe based solely on my gross annual income, and DO NOT CONSIDER the fact that I have another child in my custody to care for. I have Christopher three to four days out of every week. I am a full-time father to him, on great terms with his mother, providing not only food, clothes, time, and love, but also his entire health insurance plan. This has not factored whatsoever into their decision about my child support to Izabella (who is also well-cared for by her mother and her new husband.) To give my daughter’s mother extra support she does not need, they are hurting my son, who does need that money considering his medical expenses.

My only hope of bettering our circumstances is to return to court.

Therefore, my intention with your donation is threefold:

1. To pay off Christopher’s medical bills.

2. To petition the court to have my monthly child support amount lowered.

3. And to eventually regain contact and partial custody to Izabella. I am not attempting to do what her mother has done to me. I just want to see my daughter again, to be allowed to be in her life, to introduce her to her little brother.

If you would like any updates, please feel free to access my personal Facebook page: (hyperlink)

This situation has affected me deeply on all levels: as a father, a son, and a person. It has changed the way I parent Christopher, how I approach life, how cautious I am with everything I do with him, and how I am constantly trying to do things with him that I’ll never get to experience with Izabella. Every single day there is a jagged, gaping hole in my life. It’s like having a missing child even though I know exactly where she is.

Once again, thank you for being here, for your time, your attention, and your empathy. I was raised in a military family and taught to handle things myself, to never “ask for a handout,” but with this many obstacles to care for both Christopher and Izabella, I am asking for a hand up to help my children thrive. You’ve contributed to that simply by engaging with this post. You can take that a step further by sharing online, telling a friend about my campaign, or by donating yourself. And trust me, I understand how tight the economy is currently; any amount given is beyond generous and deeply, deeply appreciated. Whatever you choose, my family and I are grateful to you.