My abuser died this weekend.

I’ve spent the last 72 hours watching people talk about what a great man he was, and it has taken everything in me not to respond with the truth of who and what he is and if I should even be sharing this.

I have sincere sympathy for his children and the people who loved him. Losing a parent is painful, I’ve experienced this myself, and I don’t wish that hurt on anyone.

His death does not absolve him from what he did. It does not change the trauma I lived through and continue to live with. Where others may see the facade of a “good man”, I see a vile disgusting monster.

I will not pretend to be heartbroken. I will not participate in rewriting history. My peace comes from knowing he can never hurt anyone ever again.

As for whatever comes in the next life, I can only hope he is judged accordingly for the life he lived and the harm he caused.

But this post isn’t meant to give him a spotlight or create a debate about him.

I want it to be a platform to help the children who are still being hurt.

The survivors who still don’t feel safe enough to speak.

The people who were ignored, dismissed, or never believed.

So instead of spending my energy on a man who can no longer hurt anyone, I’m choosing to do something that might help those who are still living with the effects of abuse.

Today I’m asking for donations for RAINN. Every dollar raised will go toward protecting children, supporting survivors, and giving a voice to those who have been silenced.

If you’d like to support, donate. If you can’t donate, share your time with an organization that helps those suffering from abuse, share your feelings with a friend, if this message speaks to you, just take a small step towards a better life however you can.

Let’s make this about helping the people who need it most.