Support Noah's Hawaiian Healing Journey

"See my hands, they reach for you. My heart is a hand reaching."

— Hannah Kent, Devotion

Dear friends and community,

I’m reaching out to ask for a gift.

Normally someone else would write this kind of thing—but I believe in making support-seeking visible. Even when it’s vulnerable. Even when it’s scary.

In truth, I feel loved when I receive. When I stretch my heart open and allow generosity to pour in.

I turn 40 this year and celebrate ten years of self-employment as a body worker, celebrant, writer and myriad of ways I have made a life for myself on my own terms over the years. I deeply love what I have created and the incredible people who circle and hold me.

And oh my god—you’ve held me through some of the biggest storms of my life.

My close people know the challenges I have been facing these past years, but for those who don’t, let me bring you in.

The journey so far

In 2020, I experienced what I thought was a severe panic attack. I spiralled into months of daily episodes of weakness and paralysis, tremors, difficulty walking, sensory disturbances, losing my vision, stuttering and slurring, memory issues and seizures. It was entirely

debilitating; I couldn’t do the simplest of tasks to look after myself. I had to lean into my people hard, they leaned back and I am beyond grateful to the incredible people who have held me through all of this.

As someone who once danced freely, hugged hard, massaged for a living, and felt deeply at home in my body, it’s been devastating to lose control of the vessel I so relied on—for expression, for work, for life.

The healing journey

The last five years have taken me to multiple alternative and conventional healthcare practitioners, trauma therapists and body workers. I’ve been in and out of hospital and spent thousands of dollars trying to navigate this terrifying situation.

I finally received a diagnosis of Functional Neurological Disorder which is an umbrella term for a neurological disorder that impacts the functions of the body. There is no medical evidence as to why it

occurs and no cure beyond lifestyle management. I still have episodes daily; they are smaller and more manageable and the big message I have received though all of this is -

It's time to slow down my love.

I don’t have the capacity I used to, I am sensitive and susceptible to extreme burn out if I overstretch. Overstretching can be as simple as doing two social events in one weekend.

The path forward

As I Marie Kondo my life, it is clear that Spiritual Hawaiian Lomilomi is my path of service and commitment. Next year, I begin Lomilomi teacher training with my wonderful teacher Charlie Snow. To walk this path with integrity it feels vital that I connect with the Islands of

Hawaii, learn from the lineage holders and deepen my personal practice.

Why I’m Asking for this gift

In October, I am participating in the 21-day Lomilomi Mastership training with Ho’omanamana Spa on Maui.

The training itself costs $3400 USD, which is currently $5292 AUD. This doesn’t include food, accommodation or flights, the total trip will cost over $10,000.

Could I save the money myself? Technically yes. I could hustle, offer more Lomilomi sessions, weddings and funerals. I could take on extra disability support work and do the daily grind.

But, the truth is, I know what it will cost me; my health.

I don’t want to do that to myself. With the life changes I’ve made and support of practitioners I’ve found I finally feel my foundational wellbeing returning, and I want to protect it with the fierceness of a Lioness protecting her cubs. I could choose not to go to Hawaii, but in my heart, it is not an option at all.

I trust in life; I trust in reciprocity and I am open to the possibility that I don’t have to do this alone.

Every dollar offered will ripple back into the world through my hands and heart. I’ll return with Aloha—ready to serve, teach, and continue this sacred work.

I have chosen a goal of $5000 to cover the course. I will cover the rest. I know I can’t save the full amount for this trip without experiencing extreme burn out and I want to arrive in Hawaii strong in my body so that I can be present to the teachings and bring the medicine

back to my community.

I welcome any support I receive in getting there.

Thank you for being with me on this wild journey of life, I love you.

Mahalo Nui Loa, Noah/Sarah

With deepest gratitude, Noah/Sarah