Support Jared's Journey: Urgent Help Needed

Working at GoFundMe for seven and a half years was the experience of a lifetime. I am so grateful for my experiences there, where I coached people how to ask for support in times of tragedy and loss. I suggested they get vulnerable by telling the truth about their circumstances to give their communities an opportunity to help.

This summer, I lost that job. Now life is life’ing - hard - and the advice I once gave cheerfully feels so uncomfortable and icky.

Alas! Here I am, resisting hypocrisy and pride because I need a lot of help right now to keep afloat, housed, fed, and hopefully useful to my community.

Since August, I’ve spent every day hustling to earn an income.

I set up the unemployment bennies. Posted on the job boards. Activated the professional networks. Got the other social services. Put on my consulting pants while simultaneously amping up my profiles on the AI-powered resume apps, which are pretty much just dressed up dating apps with power verbs.

I enrolled in community college to keep up with the kids. Go LACC Cubs!

I cast a wide net of opportunities with a growth-centered mindset.

The universe opened up for me! I got interviews for salaried career positions. I started my consulting biz and landed some great projects I’m proud of. The professional networks expanded.

I got clear on my passion for supporting my community of people living with HIV and AIDS, linked up with a friend and powerhouse creator, and pitched a podcast featuring stories of longterm survivors. (Still, in the works… DM for more info!)

Having dedicated several years in a money program, I adapted with relative ease by cutting expenses and tightening up on spending.

The blessings rained down!

Learning about more services for people living with HIV, like Being Alive, a local HIV support service network, I’ve been gifted trips to the barber shop, set up with case management to ensure access to healthcare, and a community of people offering dignity and care to people living with HIV.

When I went to cancel my gym membership, the owners politely refused citing my need for endorphins and they comped my membership. Um, what?!

When the fires hit LA, and Gloria and I were ill with lung issues (and terrified), friends chipped in to get me gas and basic needs to flee to clearer skies in San Diego.

Out of the blue, my private pay, queer therapy collective linked me up with a foundation that covers those bills. The foundation’s mission is to give people in recovery access to tailored resources to maintain their sobriety.

And thank god for recovery! I’m in my tenth year of continuous sobriety, without which I’d be fucked. It’s given me a way of living that’s kept me pretty sane and serene. (If you’re struggling with drugs or alcohol, no big! I mean, it’s one hundred percent awful. But the experience is super common. And there’s tons of support for you. Slide into my DMs and I’m happy to share my experience.)

But some harsh realities have set in. And the systems that have helped are tapped.

I’ve also fallen into some almost comically tragic moments, like showing up to a food bank this week where I have been several times, and my client account had disappeared. Who knew the red tape to get some groceries would be so challenging. (But also, bless the nonprofit orgs doing the lord’s work with so few resources themselves.)

Walking out of that food bank in tears, one of my sober sisters who coincidentally works there turned the corner and held me while I cried on his shoulder. Sometimes rolling with the punches just feels like too much to bear.

This is the type of relief the universe continues to show me right when I need it most.

Around every rough corner, I’ve been uplifted by loved ones and strangers alike willing to lend a hand.

Which is why I am taking my own advice to ask for your generous help to meet these basic needs:

— March rent - $2,162

— Two months car payments - $1,380

— SoCal Edison - $485

— SoCal Gas - $77

— Verizon - $128

— CA DMV Registration - $305

— UCLA Health - $890

— AAA car insurance - $475

— Mohela student loans - $125

Total — $6,027

(Thank you to those of you who sent me random, unsolicited gifts - they’ve been so meaningful.)

I’m still out there pounding the pavement to get a job. My personal return to work mandate is understood, ha!

I’m also forging ahead with my marketing and business development consultancy. I’ve been getting coached by the staff at the California Department of Rehabilitation, which is making sure I get the company set up properly and am making smart decisions. (If you have a disability, you might be eligible for support!)

My rent is also too high. So I have a handful of alternatives in the pipeline, including putting everything in storage and moving into a sober living that could be subsidized by insurance and at least less expensive and in an affirming environment.

There are a couple friends’ spare bedrooms awaiting my occupancy.

This is hella hard. But, most days, I see the silver lining.

Most significantly: I’ve been gifted with space for reflection.

With the guidance of some incredible mentors, I’m writing and creating (you know who you are… and thank you!). So perhaps one day, some of these challenges will fill the pages of a best-selling memoir or become an abstract of the next popular streaming show.

And even though I’m afraid this GoFundMe will read like an Onion headline, maybe it’s just the story of a person trying to get through this weird life with some help from a community of kind-hearted helpers.

Either way, I humbly ask for your support by:

I can think of many other worthy causes - certainly more noble ones. But this direct, individual support is one cause you might see direct impact and feel personally rewarded.

As always, I’m holding onto my favorite sayings. You may enjoy them too:

This, too, shall pass.

More will be revealed.

Humbly with love,

Jared

xx