Help Us Build a Safe Haven for Eilaf!
Hello everyone, I’m Adame. I’m seeking your help to make a dream come true for my family and, most importantly, for my youngest daughter.
A bit about me
For the last 20 years, I’ve been building a career in the WordPress space. I’m currently the product manager for one of the leading WordPress performance plugins.
If you’ve ever worked on making a WordPress website faster, you may have already used some of the features I personally crafted, such as:
- Lazyload for CSS backgrounds
- Critical images optimization (LCP detection and lazyload exclusions for above the fold images)
- Critical fonts optimization
- Automatic lazy render
- Auto-preconnect to external domains
My daily work is dedicated to making more than 5 million WordPress websites faster, but today, I’m focused on a much more personal project.
Our Story: A New Life in Finland
My wife and I are the proud parents of two wonderful girls: Alae (11) and Eilaf (7).
In late 2024, we made the life-changing decision to move from our home country to Finland.
Our primary goal was to give our daughters a better life, especially for Eilaf, who is autistic and non-verbal.
We wanted to ensure she would have access to the compassionate, specialized education she needs to thrive, become autonomous, and live in a society where her rights and future are protected.
So far, the move has been a success.
Alae is thriving in a hybrid 4th-grade class, and Eilaf is receiving care in a special needs class that we could only have dreamed of before.
The Problem: Our current home doesn't fit Eilaf’s needs ❌
We currently live in a 3-room rental apartment.
While spacious, with good connections and near the girls' school, we cannot make the modifications required to fit Eilaf's unique needs.
This has become a source of constant stress and increasing safety concerns.
⚠️ Safety Risks
Eilaf’s sensory needs and lack of danger awareness make a standard apartment hazardous:
- The Stove: Our rental stove lacks a parental lock and stays hot long after use. Since we can't replace it, we’ve had to tape the knobs and use a separate countertop induction stove. The fear that she might turn on the original stove is a constant weight on our minds.
- Windowsills: She climbs onto the wide indoor windowsills to move side-to-side. These are built into the wall and cannot be removed.
- Glass Panels: All room doors have glass panels at the top of each door. When Eilaf wants attention, she climbs the doorframes to knock directly on the them.
Loud Play & Irregular Sleep
Eilaf’s play is energetic and loud.
Like many children on the spectrum, her sleep patterns are unpredictable.
She often wakes at 3 AM ready for "playtime."
While our neighbors have been kind, we know the noise is a burden for them, and we live in constant anxiety about disturbing our community.
No Private Outdoor Space
Eilaf adores the outdoors, exploring textures like leaves and flowers.
However, in shared spaces, her behavior is often misunderstood by neighbors.
She also loves jumping on trampolines and swimming, which simply aren't possible in a shared rental environment.
Social Challenges
Because Eilaf is non-verbal and still developing an understanding of social cues, shared playgrounds are difficult to manage if other kids are around.
Concepts like "waiting your turn" or "sharing" are not yet part of her world.
We now limit her playground time to hours when no one else is around to avoid tension.
The Solution: A Home Adapted to Eilaf’s Needs ✔️
Our goal is to purchase a detached house where Eilaf can have the freedom to be herself in a safe, controlled, and judgment-free environment.
The Market Reality says otherwise
In the current Finnish market, a home that "checks all the boxes" for Eilaf's safety and sensory needs costs approximately €250,000.
Financing this has proven incredibly difficult due to a combination of market rules and our personal values.
Our faith is very strict regarding interest. While there is room for leniency when there is no other path, especially when the goal is a child's safety rather than building wealth, it doesn't satisfy our needs.
We were approved for a mortgage with a hard cap of €170,000, with €20,000 self-financed. Effectively, the bank is granting us €150,000. All major banks we consulted hit this same limit.
Unfortunately, that route is a dead-end for two reasons:
- Older homes within that budget require renovations so extensive that the banks refuse to finance them and considers them as "high risk."
- Move-in ready homes that banks will approve start at around €250,000, far exceeding our loan limit.
Why we're asking for help?
The limit imposed by the bank was a moment of clarity for us. It was a sign that the traditional mortgage path might not be the right way to solve our family's unique situation.
We are aiming to explore solutions outside of the banking path.
Mathematically, the goal is achievable. With what we currently pay in rent, around €1600 per month, we could repay our €250,000 target home in around 13 years.
By securing a future-proof property now, one that won't require heavy investment or maintenance for at least 15 years, we are buying Eilaf the time and stability she needs to grow.
This isn't just about a house; it’s about the next 15 years of Eilaf’s development.
Our goal is to see her become independent, functional, and hopefully help her find an occupation she loves.
We want her to enjoy life on her own terms, and that starts with a home that doesn't hold her back.
Our dream for her is simple:
- A morning where she can wake up at 3 AM and play without us worrying about the neighbors. ☀️
- A home where we don't have to ask "who has eyes on Eilaf?" every second because we know not all areas are totally safe. ✅
- A private yard where she can jump on her trampoline and have fun ♀️
How you can help make this a reality
1. Donate
Every contribution brings us one step closer. Every penny goes directly toward bridging the gap for our future home.
2. Lend as a "Pay it Forward" ⌛
If you prefer to offer a temporary loan interests-free, we would be incredibly thankful. Once we are able, we pledge to pay it forward by donating the same amount to a charity in your name. We will keep a public track for accountability for that.
3. Share
If you can't contribute financially, sharing our story with your network is just as valuable.
4. Support our "Hustle" ➕
Buy the cool WordPress Tools lifetime deals I cumulated through the years: You can purchase one of my lifetime WordPress themes or plugins. Please reach out for the list of available tools.
Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for reading our story. You are helping us give our little girl the world.
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