I’ve been having a haunting recurring dream for the last few months.

Each time I have it, it gets a bit more...intense.

Some of the details change, but the key pieces of it stay the same.

I am running.

I am running for my life.

I don’t know how much longer I can run.

But I know if I stop, they’ll catch me.

Sometimes it’s just one person.

Sometimes it’s an entire mob.

And just like dream logic, somehow I know

I know that if they catch me, they will kill me

and mount me on the wall,

Next to all of the rest of their transgender prey.

Most of the time, I wake up once they shoot me, or once I would have died in the dream.

But sometimes, it doesn’t stop there.

Sometimes, it goes all the way until I am mounted in the hunting lodge.

Sometimes, it goes past me being “dead” and keeps going as the hunter taxidermizes me.

In one of them, he takes out my eyes and I can’t see, but I can still hear and sense everything going on around me.

In this one, the hunter throws a party to show off his newest prize (me).

I can’t see anything, but I hear people saying things like, “good job thinning their numbers” or, “you’re doing God’s work exterminating these vermin,” referring to me and the other transgender ‘trophies’.

I always wake up panting and a bit shaken for the rest of the day.

Because, as much as I want to say, “oh, it was just a dream, it’ll be fine”.

That’s not the case.

The current US political administration hasn’t been shy about the future they want for trans people. They’ve basically said out loud that they want to exterminate all trans people.

Even genocide experts say the US is in early stages of genocide against all transgender people.

There are people hunting me in my waking life.

And while I don’t think they want to mount me on their walls like some hunting trophy, they have said, literally with their words, that their end goal is to end the existence of all trans people.

That’s why I need your help.

My Name is Cosmic. I’m the first non-binary trans person to get a gender X marker in a very red state.

That’s not my legal name, but I’m sure you can understand why I’m not sharing what that is. If you know my legal name, please don't mention it, just for protection’s sake.

My case has helped many others get their X marker as well, and has prevented my state from passing some especially heinous legistlation that would impact not only my transgender community, but many cisgender people as well.

If you’ve seen the news at all in the past few years, you’ll know that some groups are trying to make the lives of me and those in my community impossible, or end those lives all together.

Despite what they all say, I’ve never wanted to hurt anyone, or make someone be something they aren’t.

I cry when I see others hurt.

I sit with them to show them that they don't have to hurt alone.

I believe people when they tell me what their experience is, even if that experience doesn’t make sense or goes against the norm.

And sometimes, that’s all it takes to help them continue on to another day.

But living in a red state as a transgender person is just not safe.

And it gets more dangerous with each passing day.

It hasn’t been safe here for several years. I just have the blessed privilege of passing and no one thinks twice when they look at me.

But if someone found me online, found the articles that are out there about me, it would be very easy for them to find me and do….well, I don’t want to think about what they’d do.

In the last year alone, anti-trans violence has gone up 14%.

And in 2026 alone, nearly 800 anti trans bills were introduced across the states.

Genocide scholars announced early this year that the US is already well past the first stage of genocide towards the entire transgender population. And each day, our administration barrels at top speed towards eradicating an entire group of humans.

I need your help to get out.

I am being chased out of my home state for choosing my true self instead of living a lie.

No one deserves that.

Please help me get to safety.

I have dreams and goals, just like anyone else.

But I can’t chase them if I’m constantly running for my life or living on alert all the time.

Even just $1 helps.

Or, if you don’t have the means to donate (or even if you do) please share this with anyone who does not hate trans people. The more people we can get to see this, the more likely we are to reach our goal.

Once I’ve gotten to safety and know that I’m safe, I will become a peer support specialist. They are basically mental health first responders.

I know what it’s like to feel like the whole world is against you, wants you gone, wants you dead. And I want to help others who are in that mind-space and don’t see the point of continuing on even one more day.

So you helping me get out of danger means you’d also be helping those who are at the very end of the rope.

Once I get to safety and as soon as I get established, I’ll help other trans folks in red states get to safety as well. So it won’t just be me you’re helping.

I very much believe in paying it forward, and do that as much as I am able to. However, with how under-resourced and afraid I am, I can’t help anyone like this.

Donations will be used to cover moving costs, living expenses if I'm not able to get work before relocating, deposit and first month rent for the new place in a blue state.

Should this fundraiser exceed its goals, all excess will be donated to @justsaysk , who uses their platform to personally assist hundreds of trans people in fleeing persecution in red states.