Support April and Kid’s Fight for Safety

My name is April Charmley. I need to hire a lawyer immediately for July court date; I can’t self-represent. My ex is engaging in parental alienation and suspicious for abuse/neglect, with a history of domestic violence against me that I never pressed charges for. I’m asking for help to hire a lawyer for my kids’ sake.

“Victim” is not my name. I’ve been growing in new mindsets on a road of recovery from a violent past and very abusive person, my kid’s dad. I am in MyChoice Program (designed for abused women with children), and am a regular attender at Unite Church.

This is for my kids -my young daughter, and I also have two older children who I believe are very, very trauma-bonded to their dad, and this is how I can fight for them, fight for their liberties, fight to take care of them, make sure they make it to their appointments, and get to their therapy.

I have got to get a lawyer. This guy, their dad, I’ve known to be a bad, bad dude historically, coercing and controlling. In the last couple years he has been preventing my teens from having any contact with me, skipping their weekend time with me, claiming it is their choice but I don’t believe that. My young daughter, who has court-mandated time with me, has clearly shown fear of him. I am greatly concerned about my kids living situation with him with many signs I can’t ignore, and I must get a lawyer to advocate for these precious kids. I can’t without donations to do that. These kids should be supported and encoursged in time with both parents and have two parents who are practicing growing parenting skills.

The following provides more detail, or you can skip to the bottom, as I know it is lengthy. -

This was him; click to see. He nearly killed me then in 2018. (He eventually went to prison and a court-required recovery program… I do not trust him or feel at all safe with him.)

https://www.adn.com/alaska-news/crime-courts/2018/07/17/police-seek-man-accused-of-hitting-woman-with-shovel-and-vehicle/

I unfortunately stayed in the abuse for years before then, not knowing the way out, hiding it, persisting as a victim in fear. He seemed like a terrorist, like he enjoyed hurting me and trying to control through fear.

For your optional viewing, here’s my video on YouTube processing what I’ve been through.

https://youtu.be/fi7Y1M5E9js?si=MXGvfgaIYmFrbXYy

I thought it was something to put up with... somehow part of a loving relationship. When I shared with someone about the abuse, she asked me, "What did you do?" like him hitting me was my fault. Besides plenty of bruises in ongoing abuse, he stabbed me with a knife, and the wound is documented in my medical record. There is also at least one major instance of bruises in my medical record when the provider knew I was being hit, but I denied it then.

I have never pressed charges.

Even after I left and have been recovering my life, I have been afraid of him and living traumatized. He hit me even when I was pregnant, and I did not know how to get out and save my life and kids. When baby was born, I did not write his name on the birth certificate, hoping someone would ask why and see and help me find the way out! I had always been afraid, covered for him, insisting “I fell”. To the court, the shovel event looks like an isolated event; the court has no record of his domestic violence.

I believe in recovery, but I don’t see this person showing heart change. When I was last around him at my young daughter's birthday party, he threatened that his girlfriend would “beat me up.”

I felt very scared.

I do NOT believe this person who has shown such abusive narcissistic behavior is providing a good, safe, loving environment for my kids.

The parenting agreement I signed with their dad in court says we will coparent:

I will have my young daughter every weekend and also my teenage kids every weekend "as long as they want to". 

The dad has said both teens "don't want to" have time with me on the weekend. Yet for the brief time I had my sons phone number, he was obviously eager to talk to me and told me he wanted to come with me on the weekend. Soon after that, the phone number stopped working.

While in court he said it was important to support their relationship with me, their Dad has prevented the teens and I from having ANY contact. He has shown no cooperation, towards the end of family therapy or anything else.

My young daughter said their dad told them they had to choose one of us. She said her big brother sat there crying. (Maybe he’s told them if they they want to see me, they would never see him again or other threats. He threatened me darkly about leaving him. I don’t know.)

The court responded to my request for child interviews, when my teens get to speak for themselves if they want to see me on the weekend. Their dad was permitted to have those interviews done via zoom at his house!

Their dad has also refused to let my sister, (their aunt), their grandmother, or their tribe (Chief Lee Stephen) speak to them.

The last time I saw my teens was Christmas Eve 2024 when they joined me just to sit together in my church gathering, no time for talking. But my daughter’s eyes; I sensed deeply that she was trying to speak to me.

As far as my young daughter, the agreement mandated that she be with me all weekends, so I have had consistent relationship with her thankfully. However, she is having many problems, there’s many red flags, and I am very concerned about her dad’s parenting method to say the least. I’ll mention just two examples.

When it was time for him to pick her up she erupted, “I don’t want to go! I don’t want him to hurt me!”, panicking and running away to hide instead of going to his car.

Here is one more example. She had a terrible bruised bite mark on the back of her arm. I inquired and her first response was “I fell,” which she adamantly repeated. It was only after I insisted that she finally told me that another kid, dad’s stepson, did it. Why was this her immediate adamant response, so determinedly repeated?

I called dad on speaker phone at Urgent Care, asking about the injury. His response was "she did it to herself". It was the back of her arm, making that physically impossible. Why would he respond so callously to his daughter’s injury?

I’m led to believe the kids live in fear of him, like I did.

One more, to help you see my concern as a mom. A while back, when I was getting time with my teen daughter she had chosen to have her hair highlighted to look just like mine, to match. Her dad shaved my teen daughter’s head. This was at the start of her 8th grade year. His response: “she wanted it.” My little daughter said no, her big sister was held down and protesting! My understanding is that when the court asked my teen, my teen said “she wanted it”. Oh my kids, my heart, I’m so concerned my ex seems like an all-powerful force to them and they’ve lost their voice, in hopelessness… I’m out of their lives and it would seem like there’s no one.

A final mention…

My teens medical records show he’s neglecting their needs… One example is my son has an endocrine disorder… I saw his weight had gotten severe when I had that brief time sitting with him Christmas Eve. Enough details.

He is now petitioning the court to move out of state with the kids. The court date is July 3rd.

I really need a lawyer immediately. Please help me help my kids.

I am learning to receive love and healing and to stop living in fear. These kids are worth fighting for and I am the only one who can bring this to the court. For the precious lives of my kids, will you please consider a generous donation to this lawyer fund right now? Please, please help me get a lawyer today.

This is it; the court date is July 3rd.

There are lawyers ready to take my case right now, just waiting for the funds required up front.

If you know anyone else who’d also support, please share.

This platform takes no extra fee; your donation goes entirely to my legal fund IF you are careful to select $0 tip. You may also check the box if you’d like to donate anonymously.

April Charmley

This has been a long journey…

starting with escaping for my life… going through 2020 Covid, freedom from coping via alcohol, in hope stepping forward to do all I can for my kids. I’m not going back.

I want my kids feeling safe and being seen, known, and loved.