"How can one attempt to heal when constant turmoil breaks the soul?" -Anonymous

Hello everyone,

Our story is a difficult one and I appreciate you taking the time to read. For our privacy I blocked out our faces as this is a very sensitive matter.

On March 3, 2023, I found out that my husband was raping my (at the time) 14 year old daughter (his stepdaughter, that he helped raise since 3yrs old) for the period of a year while I was focused on going to school as a full-time student in LA. (We live 1.5 hrs away) Threatening to kill me if she had ever said anything. My ex-husband and I also have a 9yr old son together and he would threaten to beat him if he opened his mouth or hurt mommy I found out later. Taking advantage of both my childrens love for their mother. He made sure to hide everything while I was busy trying to push myself to give my children a better life with schooling and the amount of hard work that entails. Mind you, this started 1 year after I had just helped my ex-husband get through battling cancer. He was at work at the time when I found out and too much of a coward to face me. He was arrested and incarcerated for 12 years with 2 felony charges.

You can not imagine to pain and betrayal as both a mother and a wife that I went through (crying to my kids asking "why didnt you tell me I would have protected you with everything I had!" They were too scared and still are at some sort of retaliation he may do.) Somehow I managed to pick myself up and push forward. I got my kids the therapy they needed and worked hard to finish school. Graduating with Deans honor roll awards. It was a lot mentally but I had to show my kids not to give up.

My ex was diagnosed as a pure narcissist and the amount of financial issues that arose was too much to bear.

I had to voluntarily repossess the toy hauler and his truck as the amount was way more than I could handle. Sold the dirtbikes which was our only outlet, but things seemed to slightly pick up and seemed reasonable..... until the Heloc ended a promotional period I was unaware of and instead of 200.00 a month it went to 500.00 a month not touching the premium. Only interest. At that point I was already going paycheck to paycheck but had a little left for my kids if they needed new shoes or a pair of pants. Then only 8 months after finding out what that evil human did to my babies my beloved 10 year old dog was diagnosed with cancer. I tried everything to save him but there was nothing I could do as it was moving so fast. I lost my best friend. You know talking to him, crying to him while he licked away tears....it was like losing a piece of my soul.

I ended up getting behind on bills due to throwing everything I could at medical costs for my dog and eventually caught up again working 60+ hrs a week. I didnt have much time with my kids at that time and they needed me. My mother stepped in to babysit after everything. I had to do whatever I could to keep us going.

I was able to drop down to less hours until my father died a few months later suddenly and in a horrendous way. He was a rock through all of this pain. The one person who I could cry to and not feel judged. Who I could constantly ask why! Why is all of this happening to us! He didnt even have to answer but just listen. And then he was gone. Just like that.

After his passing I had to help pay to get his remains to scatter later, as I could not afford to pay for what he wished to do it.

After so much loss and pain my daughter attempted suicide 1 month later. Blaming herself for all of it..... That broke me. She had to know that wasn't true, none of it was her fault. My son at just 8 years old was also blaming himself, saying how maybe if he listened better daddy wouldnt have hurt sissy.....I could no longer afford therapy for them at the time and I felt lost. How do I help them.....After some time I finally got them through with lots of love and quality time while I was still working full time. Sleeping 5 hrs or less a night. It took a lot out of me. I went to the hospital 2x for minor heart attacks from the stress. I never went to therapy through all of this because my kids were my focus. I kept telling myself I can't give up.....keep going....you have to keep going....

Now after all of that. All the pain and suffering, still going through court as my ex is trying to take my son and send him to his mother in Colorado that he has only met 2 times as a baby (her and his choice as they hated eachother) and get the kids and I out of the house so his mother can sell it. I'm on the deed as well......

My kids and I need help. My personal family has not been there for me through any of this, aside from my mother and father whom both were financially struggling as well. It was suggested to me to start a go fund me by some friends. I kept pushing it off as I thought I could do it myself, but I can't. There is too much damage.

I am asking for donations to help bring my home out of foreclosure. Logix bank has a Heloc on the home and refused to work with me for a more manageable payment. We can't be homeless after all of that. I owe on my $250,000 mortgage, my $35,000 car (upside down on/cant even trade it in), and now the heloc $54,000. Until the court proceedings are done I can't leave the county. I just need more time. I can't come up with the money fast enough on my own. The Heloc put the house in foreclosure and I am current on the mortgage now and 1 payment behind on my car. Anything would help.

Please help us save our home. I know its a lot to ask but if by some miracle we can keep going. I promise I'll keep fighting until my last breath.

Thank you for listening,

Annie