Stand by BB: Caregiving for Mom's Cancer

Hi family,

I’m writing this with a heavy and humbled heart.

My mom was recently diagnosed with stage 4 cancer, and it has become clear that I may be the best candidate to be her primary caregiver moving forward. She started her first round of chemotherapy but contracted a norovirus and had to be readmitted to the hospital. After a whirlwind of medical complications and uncertainty, it’s become evident that I am the person best positioned to care for her in this fragile, precious time.

This means stepping away from work and uprooting my life temporarily to support her full-time. In the future, I *might* qualify for assistance through California’s IHSS (In-Home Supportive Services), but that process takes around 3 months and only would cover very basic costs, if I can qualify at all. As of right now, there’s no clear guarantee of insurance or institutional support.

I’m asking for community care — from anyone who has felt supported, seen, or held by me over the years — to help carry me through this time so I can show up fully for my mom.

I’m trying to cover:

-Rent and bills

-Travel and possible relocation costs from Oakland to Arroyo Grande

-Care for my mother's animals

-Ongoing monthly expenses and debt payments

-The baseline costs of living while I offer my mom the love, comfort, and presence she deserves

In the short term, I need to quickly raise $2,500 to get through July — the most urgent window, as I’ll be traveling back to Central California immediately.

Longer term, I estimate about $15,000 to sustain the next six months.

If you’ve ever shared space with me, if I’ve ever held you, fed you, made you laugh, or supported you in any way — I ask that you consider donating, sharing, or sending love. Anything helps. I deeply understand that many of us are carrying more than we let on, and I don’t take this ask lightly. If you’re unable to give financially; your love, energy are just as meaningful. Also — feel free to share this cause with others in your network.

This is about giving my mom the tenderness and dignity she deserves — and giving me the chance to be by her side for whatever time we have left.

With deep gratitude,
BB