We have spent over $125K on legal fees, yet C & J’s father still has parental rights. I am raising funds for legal fees to finish out a 3 year long divorce and to move the court to terminate parental rights to keep my children safe. The funds will also be used for TF-CBT for all 3 of us because I’ve not been able to afford it. Anything raised that is not used will be donated to our local Children’s Advocacy Center to help other children living in this same type of nightmare. Thank you from the bottom of my heart for hearing our story!
Warning: Audio is violent. It was taken January 2018. My children were 6 and 4 at the time. This was approx. 4 months after celebrating 7 years of marriage.
***ETAA: if my post has reached you, and you need to get out of a situation like this, please call the National Domestic Violence Hotline and start making your plan! Today CAN be the first day of the rest of your life! 1-800-799-7233 (SAFE) and I’m absolutely here for any moral support you may need!***
*** ETA: This post is not for sympathy, but rather awareness. I WANT it spread far and wide, to offer hope and to finally feel like I’ve gotten justice for what was done behind closed doors. I will not hide it anymore. I WELCOME anyone who wants to share it, to do so. It’s past time that the shame of what we lived through fall where it belongs.***
The 2 year anniversary of the incident contained in this video was 10 months ago. At the time, I turned my phone camera on and stuffed it into my pocket because in my head, when “they” found me, at least my sister would know what happened to me. I did not know then, that I was in the single most dangerous situation of my life because I was getting out; but my gut knew.
The first time he hits me in this video, you hear my sunglasses break across the floor, and the last time, it was a headbutt to my nose while pinning me against the car. You hear my youngest get louder in the video... because I was holding him when I took the last blow...
I can say honestly that this content was not indicative of my entire marriage, just the last year of it. Following this incident, Charles was arrested. Weeks later, I asked the DA to drop charges & he would never see prosecution for his actions. (Typical for abuse survivors) I would learn many things in the year that followed; including how to survive repeated nuclear bombings of your life, how to identify real friends and the power a narcissistic sociopath with money has when they put a target on your back.
He would attack me physically at least two more times that year, and in between, he used the courts and law enforcement to systematically tear me apart in every way. Just a few examples: he filed upwards of 26 complaints against me with the local sheriff that were all eventually closed as unfounded, he sued me in civil court for sharing this video with law enforcement, attys and physicians AND he threatened the local Shelter House with lawsuits if they provided me and the children assistance in any way, because in his twisted mind, he was somehow the victim. All of this (and more) while campaigning hardcore everyday like a politician to convince anyone who knew us that I was the problem and mentally unstable/unfit to care for my children. Often times he won this battle in the family court system here, despite the clear negative consequences that my children suffered as a result. It was unadulterated hell to live through, yet somehow we
I HAVE to make sure that legally he can never ever come near any of us again. (Yes, I have a restraining order in place.)
#StopTheSilence #Survivor #MyStory #MyTurnToBeHeard
- Dana M Ramos
- Andrea Cooley