Sam and Tori’s Embryo Adoption

Our Story

 

We both would hold each other’s hands and cry after baby showers and birth announcements. It all just felt wrong and incredibly lonely. Infertility killed the hope. People would often look at us while their kids were running wild, screaming, crying, and laughing and say “overwhelming isn’t it, aren’t you glad you don’t have to deal with this?” No … it wasn’t overwhelming. Overwhelming was the numbness of quiet lonely nights. The kind of numb that as soon as joy krept in it felt dirty and wrong; like we couldn’t fully enjoy moments because we knew something was missing and broken. The isolation of infertility is a unique kind of loneliness. It is like watching the world through a glass case. You can see it all happening, but you can never partake in it. After a couple years of accepting our diagnosis Tori and I took a weekend away to talk about everything. One big thing that came from that weekend was how we didn’t want to become a bitter couple. As Christians we have been taught that trials are going to come and instead of fighting them to allow God to use them through you. So that’s what we did. We worked with families to help watch their kids so they could go on a dates or take a couple days to themselves. Tori made sure she worked hard in her nannying job so that when the parents got home at night the last thing they would think about was laundry and household chores, and you know what? After many seasons of prayer and just doing, our hearts started to heal. As years went by and time went on people would always say “have you not thought about adoption?” Although these words came out of a place of love and sincerity they frustrated us because adoption should never be an instead of choice. We never wanted adoption to be our plan b and we knew our hearts were still mourning our diagnosis and the only thing that could heal that was the Lord. We knew when the time was right and when the wounds would start to heal that the Lord would place that desire on our hearts in unexplainable ways. As the years progressed Tori still experienced the desire of wanting to give birth to a child so she decided to take a few months off of work and focus on rest and prayer. She would sit out on our back porch and weep and pray for God to take this burden of birthing a child off her heart if that was His will. The desire to experience pregnancy and give birth would not go away. So she let it go and let God work.

 

We prayed and asked God to lay at our feet the plan he had for us. Months went by of stillness and silence. Then on my 28th birthday we got a call that night. It was Tori’s dad and for some reason adoption was laid on both her parent’s heart that night and they decided to talk to someone in our church about an agency recommendation. He gave us a name of a woman in Tampa and told us to pray about it. He clicked off the phone and Tori and I looked at one another and immediately knew this was it. The time had come. We sat in bed for hours talking and researching. A few days later we finally got to talk to a lady at the adoption agency. She heard our story and then asked us if we had ever considered embryo adoption. We sat confused as we had never heard of it, and then she said the life changing words. “Tori you could carry the baby” … WHAT?! We knew this was the Lord. This was our calling. We took a week to pray about it so the high of the moment would be brought back to reality, but we knew; this was our open door. So that’s where we are. At the foothills of a still big mountain, but, our hearts are filled with hope and amazement at this answer to prayer. Many people have asked us how they can help during this time so we decided to start a GoFundMe for those who have been lead to help us financially. We will also be providing video updates for those who are willing to pray with us during each step of the way. We are honored to have a village of people surrounding us during this time. We could not feel more blessed.

 

What Are The Costs?

 

 

We have been told that this process will likely take 7-9 months (from application to the Embryo Transfer) and many of these costs are due during the first 3-4 months.

 

Thank you all for your prayers and donations as Tori and I take the next steps in building our family. We cannot adequately describe the gratitude we feel for those who are standing with us in this journey!