Edit March 17th 2026:

I currently owe $2300 to the courts and legal fees, anything donated will be going towards that! thank you.

TLDR; I fell for a narcissist, and over the last year of living with him, my abuser has put me in about $40k of credit card debt, hence my need for this fundraiser.

I lost my last and only good partner in October 2023 to a heart attack, and spent the following year in so much pain and grief. Then, in late October of 2024, I met someone online through mutual friends. We hit it off right away, decided to start dating, and ended up moving in together.

What I didn't fully realize about him until a few weeks ago is that he is, in fact, a full-blown, textbook narcissist. A pathological liar. I'm autistic, so I always want to help and see the good in people, though. He did the stereotypical narcissist moves of cutting me off from my friends and family, isolating me to him and him alone, so no one could warn me about him. Then all the manipulation, gaslighting, DARVO, etc., over the following year.

Before I got together with him, I had all my debts and credit cards paid off, ZERO BALANCE (from my late partner's life insurance).

Throughout our year together, he maxed out all my credit cards through his love-bombing and just buying stuff we needed for this move and that move, life in general. He talked me into the spending by saying he has a job, and made x-amount of money per year, that we'd be fine. It was true, he was working a job while living with me, but it didn't pay enough. Every time I tried talking to him about cutting back on spending so much, he'd just talk me into it again.

And then after we moved in June, we continued supporting him when he finally got his new job in August 2025. My mom co-signed on his new truck he needed for work, and I put his new iPad, iPhone, and iWatch on my cards. Then he moved onto my mom's cards because of the debt he put us in and how much we were struggling to make ends meet. She let us use them because she just wanted to help us, not knowing his true nature.

Even when he got paid and sent me money for the bills, I still think he was hiding some of his income from me. October 2nd he bought a new car by himself (financing?) that we honestly couldn't afford. We had 3 car insurance payments and 2 car payments total, with all the debt he put us in. Could NOT afford it.

He put me into around $40k of debt, not including what he owes my mom.

I was always pushing him to be better, to not lie so much when he talks to people, etc., and he didn't like that. Narcissists only ever use their current partner as a 'supply,' and my supply was dwindling, so he did what they always do, find a new supply.

Our relationship finally came to an end shortly after our 1-year anniversary, October 31st. It was around November 10th that a friend of his online was dumped, and he had been interested in her before he met me, so once he had the opportunity to pursue her, he did. So he started cheating on me with her, telling her all sorts of lies that I cheated on him first and was abusive towards him, to gain her compliance and sympathy. All untrue.

He's been moved out of my house since then, and I just want my life back. He has no plans on paying me back, and my mom and I have no hopes of paying this off ourselves.

Please share this fundraiser even if you can't donate. Thank you so much.