My wife suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder. October will be our 13th wedding anniversary, 15th year living together. We have an 11, 6, and 2-year-old. My wife is the love of my life. She was a high school dropout from a Northwest Georgia homeschooled cult of 8 children. There was rape and child molestation by siblings and severe physical abuse by adult family members up until her 16th birthday. After finally reaching her breaking point, she found a pistol hidden in a secret drawer, drew it on her father after escaping his most recent beating, and let him know that this was the last time he would ever touch her.

He typically would hold one of his six daughters down and get on top of them while beating them with whatever belt, ratchet, or wrench he could get his hands on. When she pointed the gun, he ran and called the police. As she was entering the squad car in cuffs, she asked the officer why the abused child was being arrested. His response, "You probably deserved it." She would never speak to her father again.

Grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and siblings were threatened with the promise of severe pain and various types of retribution if anyone's abuse was ever mentioned. It was all to be swept away, left to be dealt with by the psyche of the child victim that would grow into severely traumatized adults.

After meeting her when she was an 18-year-old high school dropout, she moved in with me, got her GED, Associate's Degree, Undergrad, Master's, and then Doctorate. During this 8-year ping-pong across the state of Georgia in order for her to go to various schools, we created a government contracting company in her name that I helped run.

I spent the next several years protecting her from violent threats from her father, brother, and associates of her father. It all came to a head whenever her mother became engraged that Annemarie was too stressed at post 9 months pregnant to allow an impromptu gathering at our house, called local law enforcement and said we had kidnapped one of her daughters. The same 17 year old daughter that she had asked for us to let stay at our home during her spring break so we could keep her out of trouble.

Nothing was easy, but we were fortunate. My parents and grandmother immediately loved her as a daughter and viewed her dream as their own.

I raised the children, helped run the business, and she studied unimaginable hours and sacraficed a huge portion of her twenties dedicated to accomplishing her dream. While she was engulfed with this massive workload she still managed to give birth to our first two children. True belief in oneself is hard to describe; explaining how you truly believe in a loved one is an almost impossible task.

As the years went on, my wife's mental state continued to deteriorate. After every pregnancy, she seemed to lose more and more of her mental stability. Violent outbursts, drastic mood swings, physical violence, delusions of past events, and suicide attempts left me in a constant state of fear. The pictures were the rock bottom of our 15 year relationship.

I believed I was strong enough to help her get through the hell she obviously was in. My arrogance would be one of my family's downfalls.

To this day, just a month or two before our divorce will be finalized, after everything she has done to me, my children, grandmother, and parents, I would forgive her in a heartbeat if she was willing to get help she needed and take the recommendations of professionals seriously.

I gave up on my career so I could focus on raising the children and maintaining her business while she got her Doctorate. I have not received a paycheck in over a decade, or had a personal checking account, or credit card that was not tied directly to the company she owns.

The power and control she has over me is embarrassing to even admit. If we argue, she freezes my credit card. If I don't do as she says, she will drain our line of credit and business checking account and move everything to a private account she created without my knowledge.

After almost four years of threatening divorce in order to manipulate me to do as she wanted, I finally pushed back enough to where she decided she would file.

I managed to take what little money I had access to and get a solid divorce attorney. Utilizing credit cards and family loans, I have been able to survive.

The person my wife used to be was the most wonderful, loyal, loving, and caring individual I could have ever imagined. She was my best friend and I couldn't imagine not taking my last breath as her husband. Unfortunately, that will not be a dream that gets to be fullfilled.

Mental illnesses can be more horrific than you can possibly imagine. It has destroyed the most wonderful family I never thought I would be lucky enough to have. I would do anything to have enough financial stability to get her the help she needs, even if it doesn't change the fact we are getting a divorce. I just want my wife to get better so that my children are affected as little as possible. This is a cycle that has to stop or it will continue to haunt generations to come.