- S
- A
Hi friends and family!
Deciding to make this was such a hard decision and we still feel uncomfortable putting our business out publicly. However, we’ve had to put aside our pride and fear of judgement. Being such private people, not many people even know that we have tried for a baby for over a year. There has been such an immense amount of pain during this process, it’s so raw and vulnerable to even share with the people we are close to. But here we are, asking our community for help and support to afford IVF treatment. In a perfect world, our health insurance would cover at least something, but it doesn’t. One round of treatment costs around $20,000 and we appreciate any help in reaching this goal. In a perfect world, we would know someone who is willing to be a donor for free, which would relieve some of the financial hardship, but we don’t.
When Baylie and I started this journey, we had no idea how many roadblocks we would hit. There is the obvious difficulty being that both of us are female, and we've seen upfront the exclusions within the healthcare system as lesbians trying to have a baby. In addition, we've faced difficult news regarding my fertility and learned we must take a more intensive (and expensive) route to have a baby.
Here are the reasons we can’t do this without you and we’re asking for your help:
- My fertility declines drastically with each cycle. My doctor has officially put a time limit on my healthy egg reserve and is urging us to move on to more expensive methods of fertility treatment before my time runs out. Having this time limit forces us to cover the costs sooner and prevents us from saving like we planned to if we had more time.
- My endometriosis further impacts my fertility. I had surgery to remove as much as possible in August 2021, but it is growing back and affecting the function of my fallopian tubes and ovaries. This adds to the ticking time bomb that is already constantly looming over us.
- We have spent everything we have trying to conceive thus far, and have not been successful: purchasing sperm (which is $1,040 per vial, and you need at least two vials per month), medications, and other items needed for the insemination process.
- We both want to and are ready to start a family. We’ve spent months trying to convince ourselves it’s not ‘meant to be’ or that we’re better aunts than we would be mothers. But it’s simply not true. The financial aspect is the only thing keeping us from being able to try again.
After years of therapy, healing, recovering, reading about motherhood, seeing friends and family create beautiful babies, being aunties, working in childcare, thriving in a dream career, moving into a beautiful home, and creating stability in our lives, we feel so ready to have our own baby. There has been so much hope, heartbreak, and pain in this process. Having to deal with the emotional side is already so heavy. The fact that it costs about $20,000 per try is absolutely devastating. We have exhausted all other options.
Thank you for reading (if you did, but if not, I don’t blame you) and for being invested in our journey to parenthood. Don’t feel obligated to donate, even sharing would be appreciated. Baylie and I are continuing to work hard to pay for everything we can ourselves. So anything helps! Sending you all peace and love ❤️