Join the Fight for Sidney's Safe Return

We are seeking donations to cover legal expenses for Kim and Ross to get their son back. I struggled to explain what’s going on, so I decided to tell it from the point of view of who we are fighting for. I know it’s long, but if Sidney could explain everything, this is what he would say:

“Hi! I’m Sidney Michael. I’m only 3 years old, but I’ve gone through some of the worst things anyone can ever experience. My whole life wasn’t bad, though. Actually, most of it was nothing short of incredible and perfect and full of unconditional love and pure happiness. But the other stuff? Oof. It’s enough to break your heart (I know it’s broken mine). I can divide my life so far into three parts: Before, With, and After Mom & Dad.

Before Mom & Dad:

When I was born, I was a perfect little boy who was so sick. While God was making me, the woman who carried me was doing all sorts of drugs and drinking a lot of alcohol. I had to spend some time in the NICU because of this. I was given a pretty grim outlook and there wasn’t much hope of me surviving, but God took care of me because he knew how much joy I would bring to this world. After I got out of the NICU, it took a little while for my tribe to find a place for me to stay since the woman I came from wasn’t safe. The family that adopted my other brothers and sister as they went into foster care one by one after they were born couldn’t take more kids either.

Now, I’m not an expert, but I know how important those first days of life are. Like all babies, I was born with an instinct to seek out and form attachments with my caregiver. I did that with my nurses in the NICU, but just when we were figuring each other out, I was sent to my first foster home. Confused but hopeful, I tried to form an attachment with my new foster mom. I didn’t know I wasn’t staying there, but she knew it was temporary. This confused me more, as we didn’t have enough time to figure each other out. By the time I got to the next foster home, my little brain had decided avoiding attachments was my job.

With Mom & Dad:

The ride to this foster home was different. I could feel the excitement and joy the woman who drove me between homes was feeling. The energy in the car was calm, and so much peace was stuffed into that car with us. I knew it was the last time she would drop me off someplace just by the way this new foster mom and dad looked at me. I looked at my driver. Is she crying happy tears?

“Just love him” she said before handing over my bag.

I couldn’t believe it, but she said I got to stay there forever! Is this for real? Looking at my driver’s overjoyed face as she drove away made my new situation a little more believable.

My first few hours in my forever home were crazy. I had so many people coming to meet me! I got to meet my big sister and brother, three of my grandmas, two of my grandpas, my crazy auntie, some pretty cool uncles, and more cousins than you can imagine. But out of all these people, Mommy and Daddy were my favorite (Grandma Audrey was only slightly behind them). Remember though- my brain avoids attachment now, so feeling their love ooze through every cell of my perfect little body wasn’t something I knew how to handle. But that didn’t stop them… their love for me was so strong and pure and perfect that I finally accepted snuggles and comfort after a few months. Now that I was learning how to feel safe and how to trust, the rest of my time with Mom & Dad was nothing short of amazing.

Despite my rough beginnings, I met most of my milestones at an appropriate time. Mom devoted herself to making sure I was as healthy and happy as possible. I wasn’t expected to be thriving like this. Little did the odds and statistics know, though- God had every bit of this planned out (even the yucky stuff I’ve had to go through, because I know so much good will come out of my case).

During the nearly three years I spent with Mom and Dad (1,018 days to be exact), I had the best life you could ask for. Mia and Christian, my big sister and brother, were the coolest siblings in the world. Going to watch Christian play basketball, football, baseball, or whatever else was always a ton of fun. Mia was fun to watch, too. Like me, my brother and sister had a rough start to life. And in true Mom and Dad fashion, every need my siblings had was met with the guiding hands of Jesus and the unconditional love. You should see Mia on stage dancing…. You’d never believe she had to work so hard to simply walk without tripping!

I had so many wonderful things in my life. I’ll have to tell you about them randomly. I just want you to see how much joy I got to experience.

I had two dogs and three cats. My dogs were HUGE but I absolutely loved snuggling with them. My kitties loved snuggles, too. My favorite kitty was Mr. E. He let me carry him everywhere. I had my own bedroom right beside Mom and Dad’s room, right across from Mia’s, and just down the hall from Christian’s. Bath time in Mom’s bathtub was my jam and where I perfected my giggle. My yard was a ton of fun, and bike rides with my family made me the happiest kid on the sidewalk (I even learned how to ride my bike before I was 3…. You should see me scoot!).

Like I said before, Grandma Audrey almost tied with Mom and Dad on my list of favorite people. Grandma gave the best hugs, made the best cookies, and read the best stories. I loved helping grandma in her massive garden. Grandpa was usually outside too, working in the yard or cleaning up his boat. Gosh- THE BOAT! Grandpa gave the best boat rides at the lake in the summer. He’d drive us to the beach where I got to build sand castles or skip rocks with my cousins. My uncles would usually cook hot dogs on the grill and my aunties would settle fights between my cousins over who got to help me get my life jacket on after Mom reapplied my sunblock. After an exhausting day on the lake, we would go back to our camper and change into dry clothes so we could enjoy s’mores by the fire. I also loved jumping on the trampoline or swinging on the playset with my cousins. Needless to say, I slept like a rock at the lake. That old camper of ours isn't fancy, but it holds a lot of my memories! We even took it on a road trip to Florida and Disney last summer! Playing in the ocean was magical.

My Uncle Arnold loves me, even though he’s technically just Dad’s best friend of, like, a billion years. You should see the cool eagle feather he gave me! He has some of the same tribal blood I do. He talks to me with words from my native language. I don’t know what they mean yet, but I can feel them in my soul, so I know they are beautiful.

Oh, I have to tell you about my other siblings! My big brothers and sister lived in my town, and I loved seeing them. I guess the same lady who gave birth to me also had them. It was so fun getting to have a relationship with them! I was so happy they got a happy family, too! I also got to see other family members, one of whom called me her Takoja. Their eyes brought me peace and reminded me of my heritage.

There were so many people in my life who loved me. God loves me too. His love is the only thing stronger than the love I have for Mom and Dad. I went to go see God every Sunday morning with my family, and we thanked him every evening at supper and every night before bed. I loved going to church. Mom’s voice isn’t great, but that didn’t stop her from singing along and worshiping God, thanking him for all the joys in her life. And Dad? His soul was mended more and more every time he walked into church. I’m sure they’re questioning God right now, but I hope they know God’s been protecting me while we’ve been apart.

On February 13th, after almost 3 years of living the best life ever, my WHOLE FAMILY showed up at my house. EVERYONE! Are we celebrating my birthday? It was almost better than our Halloween parties, but everyone was crying. I couldn’t figure out why everyone was so sad. Why was everyone hugging me so much? (Not complaining, I LOVE hugs now, but the tears were confusing, ya know?) Suddenly a lady showed up at the door and I figured out what was going on.

“NO!” I shouted. “MOMMY! MY MOMMY!” My little hands reached for her, grabbing at air over and over, desperate to be safe in her arms like usual.

I continued screaming in my mind. “That lady who dropped me off said it was FOREVER!!! Why are you taking me?! I don’t want to leave Mom and Dad! Grandma! Don’t let her take me! GUYS!!! PLEASE! PLEASE! WHY WON’T THOSE COPS HELP?!”

I kept screaming, crying, trying to get away from this stranger. I tried hitting her, even though I knew that was wrong, BUT SHE WOULDN’T LET ME GO! The cops couldn’t even help us!

Mom and Dad promised me through shattered hearts and broken voices that they would fight with everything they have to get me back.

After Mom & Dad:

The door of the car closed with me screaming inside. She was so grumpy. I was distraught and traumatized, fighting with everything I had until I was so exhausted I fell asleep.

Everything after that day has been a blurred nightmare full of fear, confusion, and cigarette smoke. Even though she isn’t safe, the people who took me to Mom and Dad’s figured out they didn’t have authority to manage my case. Rather than hand my case over the proper agency, they just gave me back to the woman who made me so sick from drugs. She doesn’t have a home, so I sleep on the hard floor in some lady’s trailer (until she kicks us out again). I don’t know this woman who has me, but she keeps calling herself my mom. I don’t know the people at the house parties she takes me to and from at 3 in the morning either. Her boyfriend is mean and has been so violent.

I think I've been kidnapped!

I’m so scared!

I miss Mom and Dad.

I miss my brothers and sisters.

I miss Grandma. I miss all my grandmas!

I should be at the lake with my cousins, boating with Grandpa, and singing silly songs.

I miss my puppies and kitties.

I miss worshiping God with my family.

I was supposed to have a Cocomelon birthday party.

I’m sick of smelling like cigarettes.

I miss sitting down for supper with my family every night.

I want my clothes to smell the way Mom made them smell.

I miss riding my bike around the block.

I miss movie nights and family trips and sleeping in my bed and reading stories before I fall asleep.

I miss riding in Grandma’s van to get ice cream.

I want to smile the way I used to and laugh with my whole heart again.

I want routine and normalcy again.

I want out of fight or flight.

I miss my life.

THIS ISN’T FAIR!

Nobody knows who is supposed to help me. There are two tribes and two states arguing about who has jurisdiction to decide if I go home. The lady who gave birth to me can’t leave because she has warrants surrounding the reservation. North Dakota doesn’t know if they can fight for me. Standing Rock says they can’t do anything because I don’t have enough of their blood. South Dakota doesn’t think they can help me because I’m on the reservation. It’s so unfair that nobody can help me! I’m crossing my fingers that I have enough of the right blood to be enrolled Turtle Mountain Band of Chippewa. I know they will work with the lawyers to help me get back to my adoptive family and keep my relationship with my blood siblings, and maybe even get to know the man who gave me my Chippewa blood and shares my name. I know I could learn so much from him. He never hurt me. I never even got to meet him!

I know Mom and Dad are fighting for me. I can feel it in my bones. I’m not giving up hope! It costs so much money, though.

They’ve spent everything they have, but I’m still not home.

Mom and Dad don’t have a lot of money. Mom quit working to stay at home and care for me. Dad works very hard at his job doing accounting stuff. I know his MS makes things harder for him, but he keeps fighting for me.

I’m so scared that something bad will happen to me. Every day that goes by does more damage to my brain and my heart. I’m praying for a miracle. Mom and Dad made sure I knew Jesus, and I am praying every day to go home.

If you can’t donate money to help Mom and Dad save me, please share my story. Please pray for me. Pray for the lawyers helping Mom and Dad. Pray for tribal leaders to stand up for me. Pray for my biological father so he has power to help me. Pray for the lady I’m with right now that she will overcome her addictions, treat her schizophrenia, and see what’s best for me. Pray for her to see how much this has hurt me. And pray for Mom and Dad to have everything go right so I can come home.

Thank you for reading this and helping me. I’m inviting you ALL to my Cocomelon birthday party when I get home! (Mom makes REALLY yummy cake!)