Update on Oxford from Joan:

We spent Saturday and Sunday cuddling our good little boy at home, watching and waiting to see if he would keep eating food or not, agonizing between surgery that would create financial burden and the thought of losing him without trying every possible thing to save him. He drifted in and out of feeling good and feeling exhausted- one minute he was chasing squirrels in the yard and following me around every room of the house, and the next moment crawling into my lap or into my arms to be held like a baby until falling asleep. I focused all my attention on being present and savoring his spirit, observing the way he did every little thing, memorizing the weight of his head on lap, and asking for endless kisses. But Monday morning came too fast and he wasn’t really wanting food again- we knew we couldn’t watch him starve much longer, even if he was “stable” at home and didn’t seem to be suffering- we knew he must be very hungry after so long avoiding food. We simply could not stand by and watch him slowly starve because the mass on his intestines made it hurt so much to eat and go potty, that he was simply going to stop doing it.

So, per the advice of friends, I made an appointment for the in-home euthanasia company to come to our house, but they wouldn’t be able to book us until Tuesday. As I performed this unfathomable heart-wrenching task between ugly tears, Oxford rolled around joyfully in the grassy lawn at my feet. I watched him stretch out happily, belly-up in the sunshine beside me, just blissful to be near me and outside in the gentle fall sunlight. A force came over me, I simply could not imagine putting down my beautiful trusting best friend while he still longed to live, to fight, and remain my companion a bit longer. He was acting like he felt too good to be put to sleep. Something inside me just snapped and I decided to make his surgery happen, even if it wasn’t the best financial decision. I know I would not have been able to make that decision without the financial support of all our friends and family who donated to our GoFundMe. The amount of gratitude I have to my community right now is indescribable. I plan to thank each person personally when I get my shit together again. So I scraped together everything I could muster and drove back to the specialty vet to show them how healthy and spry Ox was still acting, and to implore them to do the exploratory surgery. On the way there, Ox rode the whole way with his head out the window. His joy for life shone through whatever pain and hunger he was experiencing. He beamed out of the car window as we drove the 40 minutes to the vet and my heart strained with love for this animal. (Video included, Joe filmed, messy mirror but who cares)

My normal vet happens to be friends with the surgeon and owner of the specialty vet clinic, so after I called her hysterical and desperate that morning, she called her surgeon friend on my behalf and made him personally aware of the situation. When I finally decided we weren’t giving up, he immediately received us for a surgery consultation in the afternoon. Oxford was acting so sweet, wagging his tail and kissing the surgeon, practically knocking him over with sweet pitbull enthusiasm, as though he knew how much we needed the doctor to perceive him as ‘healthy enough for surgery.’ The doctor explained he had consulted with an oncologist about the mass and it had some symptoms of a type of growth they call a ‘gist,’ so he explained the procedure it would take to remove that. “Disconnect the intestines, remove 5 inches on either side, and reattach it. No promises, it could still be cancer, it could come back, but a fighting chance at regaining the ability to eat and heal.” For an hour we dared to have hope. We drove home. We imagined an abundant Universe that would allow us to keep our beautiful best friend and cleaned the house in anticipation of surgical aftercare.

But 20 minutes into surgery the phone rang. Too soon. I knew it. It was our good surgeon explaining, he had opened Oxford’s abdomen and found blood already in the cavity. He searched area by area to find the source, mopping up the blood and clearing each organ as he worked down the digestive track. Then he found the mass. It was not in the connection between the small and large intestine as predicted on the ultrasound, it was in the ‘mesentery,’ the tissue that provides blood to the entire digestive system. The inflamed tissue was bleeding. He explained, they were able to stop the internal bleeding, but they would not be able to remove the mass that was making him ill. They could staple the internal bleeding closed, and hopefully the staples would temporarily hold on the rotten tissue, but they would not be able to remove the mass that was keeping our baby from eating. A death sentence. The doctor said he expected Oxford to come out of the anesthesia, based on his health before surgery, but that it would be humane to not allow him to suffer any longer. So we raced back to the vet hoping to make it in time to hold him and comfort him as he crossed over.

Per my request, the emergency vet allowed us to set up an area outdoors to say goodbye, rather than inside the hospital. Once in the shade, under a tree, Joe and I both laid beside Oxford and held and stroked him. We gazed at each other and out into the oak trees and grassy fields of the hill country that surrounded the vet clinic and we tried to put our baby at ease. Oxford passed listening to the gentle sound of cicadas in the trees at dusk and Joe and I whispering to him that we loved him and that it was okay to rest. And just like that, my sweet pitbull baby was gone from the world too soon.

I share this very personal thing with you because so many of you were there for me when I needed you the most. You cared about me and my dog and for that you deserve to hear how your kindness affected my world and gave me more time with my Ox. My heart is wrecked from the loss of my dog, but extremely touched by the outpouring of financial support and kind words. I was able to do everything possible to help Oxford, rather than let my best friend die without trying. Thank you so much for being there in our time of need. I took the day off work today to process this loss, but if I’m being honest, I’m still not ready to talk about it. Writing this is my way of telling everyone what happened. I appreciate all of you that went the extra mile to love me, Joe, and Oxford.

As the dust settles, I am going to update the gofundme with the exact amount I spent, and leave it open a bit longer. I am beyond grateful to all 57 people who were so generous in our time of need, and to my sister, who thought to involve our community.

Thank you all.

With love,

Joan, Joe, and Oxford

Oxford has a tumor and most likely cancer.

My sister Joan spends countless hours dedicated to teaching the youth. Although she would like to have children of her own someday, that may not be a reality for many personal and private reasons.

Oxford, her sweet dog, is her everything outside of school. He goes on most vacations and is her almost constant companion outside of school. Those that know Joan, remember that her last two dogs, Rufus and Barca, passed with in the same month leaving her and Joe devastated. Then five years ago they made the decision to fill the whole in their hearts with sweet baby Oxford. Oxford is the goodest boy and he means the world to my sister.

Unfortunately, his medical expenses have been very high, just to find out why he was clearly in a lot of pain and unable to eat or drink. So far her expenses have been $6000, which is an incredible amount of money for someone who lives on a teacher's salary. He continues to need care and its impossible to say right now what the costs will be but I have no doubt it will thousands more given what the vet anticipates.

Any amount is appreciated right now and if you cannot donate your love and support of Joan and Joe in whatever capacity you can give is still appreciated, whether is kind words or a hug. I ask to please share this message as I am not connected to many people in Joan's circle. We appreciate you love and support during this time.

Many Thanks,

Emily

Update 10/12/25:

Oxford is still home with Joan and Joey. He is drinking water and resting. He ate a little chicken and rice yesterday but has not eaten since. Without surgery the vets don't know his exact condition. Right now, Joan is waiting to see if he can be put under general anesthesia and whether they can make the financial commitment. A

A million thanks to everyone who has donated or shared this post. I cannot begin to express the deep appreciation for our community, family, and friends. Thank you!

Emily

Yours Truly,

Emily