Hi, my name is Normy. I am a single mother of two young children, and I am rebuilding our lives after surviving a deeply manipulative and abusive relationship. I recently received a Permanent Restraining Order against my ex-partner because of the emotional, financial, sexual, and psychological harm he caused. I am sharing my story to ask for support as I work to recover from the damage he left behind.

Over the past two and a half years, this man constructed an elaborate identity based on lies. He claimed to be a disabled veteran, to have advanced degrees, and to be employed in a professional career — but none of it was true. He pretended to go to work daily while actually unemployed. He invented tragedies, including deaths in his family, to explain disappearances and to manipulate my emotions. He told me he had large inheritance funds and that he was saving for a home and college funds for my children. He also involved my children in these stories, giving them false hope for stability and security.

During the relationship, he pressured and coerced me emotionally and sexually, especially during times when I was exhausted or stressed. He created cycles of guilt, affection, and manipulation to keep me attached and to make me believe I owed him trust and support. I now understand this was coercive control, not love.

Financially, the impact has been devastating. I have documented Zelle transfers totaling $29,265 that he convinced me to send for “emergencies” and “temporary situations” that later proved to be false. He told me he was managing our utility bills and car insurance — only for me to discover the utility bill had reached over $1,500 and my car insurance had lapsed for months, leaving me unknowingly driving uninsured. I have since secured new insurance to protect myself and my children.

He also misled me into giving him money to resolve what he portrayed as debts left from his previous marriage — which I now believe were tied to unpaid child support or financial obligations he avoided. He further convinced me to contribute to what he described as life-insurance-based savings accounts for our future home and my children’s education. I now know those accounts did not exist.

Pretending to be a disabled veteran.

Pretending to have a military discharge and having been in the military.

Faking his father's, aunt's, and cousin's death, among others...

Calling government agencies on speakerphone and pretending to speak to officials.

Fabricating inheritances, families, cultural identity, and emergencies.

Lived in for 2.5 years without paying rent, saying he was going to buy us a house cash with his so-called inheritance.

Sexual, emotional, financial, and psychological abuse.

When I finally attempted to leave, he escalated. His behavior became frightening and unpredictable. I obtained a Temporary Restraining Order, and after he failed to appear in court, the order was made permanent. He has no stable address, has avoided accountability, and does not respond to legal communications. He did not come to the Final Restraining Order hearing, which makes recovering the money through civil court extremely difficult.

I am moving to protect my children and rebuild a safe home. I am asking for help to recover from the immediate financial damage:

$29,265 documented with notes on financial exploitation

$5,480+ Zelles without notes to him

$1,500+ outstanding utility costs

Car insurance reinstatement after forced lapse

Relocation costs to secure a healthy environment for my children

Any support — whether financial, sharing this campaign, or simply offering encouragement — means more than I can express. I am embarrassed; my kindness and belief in the good in people was my weakness. I hope that he does not hurt or exploit any more women! My advice.....Look for signs early.... Examples: Defensive behavior, quick escalation in anger, secretive, always on the phone, wishy washy behavior, not meeting family or loved ones. FOLLOW YOUR GUT FEELINGS!

My children and I are moving forward. We are safe. And we are healing.

Thank you for taking the time to read our story.

Thank you for seeing us.

Thank you for helping us rebuild.

With gratitude,

Normy & family