Kaleb & Kelsey's IVF Fund
Donation protected
We are planning our second IVF retrieval at CNY in New York after our first two transfers failed. We never imagined we would make this part of our lives public or ask for help, but we also never thought that we would have to go to such extreme lengths to have a baby. The process is incredibly expensive from the medications, travel, add-ons, and the actual procedure itself. We were really hoping we could pay most of it ourselves, however, our need for continued treatment makes that difficult. We really appreciate any help, even if it’s just a small amount. Thank you for considering donating to help us in our efforts to bring home our baby.
Here is our story:
We got married in September 2018, and we were so excited to start growing our family right away. I was 33 at the time and was already getting a later start than I had ever wanted for myself. I could never have imagined the long painful road we had waiting ahead of us.
After months of nothing happening, we started growing concerned. We finally decided to go into the doctor to seek some answers. After many tests, it was decided that we should give intrauterine insemination (IUI) a try. By the time we got started with IUI, it was October 2019 and we had hit our one-year mark of trying. I was already growing impatient at this point but felt hopeful that this would be how we would finally get our baby. We went through three months in a row of treatment and nothing happened. It was heartbreaking. We knew our only option after that would be IVF. We decided to give it one last try before moving on, then the pandemic hit and delayed us. After a few months on hold we were able to try again, but that one failed as well.
In May 2020, we had our first IVF consult with our local clinic. It sounded so promising but came with a $25,000 price tag. We had a really hard time with the thought of spending that much for just one cycle. I did some research and ended up finding an affordable clinic in New York that offered remote monitoring, called CNY.
I was so sure after only one retrieval and transfer we would have our baby. We had our first retrieval in November 2020 in Albany, NY. Out of the 10 eggs retrieved, 7 were mature, 7 fertilized, and 4 made it to blastocyst stage, and a week later we transferred 2 embryos. Right before Thanksgiving, we found out that our first transfer had failed. It was truly devastating news for me. I spent the next week taking time for myself and doing whatever I wanted. I’ve been on so many restrictions over the last year while doing fertility treatments, that it felt nice to have a small break for myself. We decided to take December off and do a hysteroscopy which is a procedure that looks inside the uterus to rule out any issues that may be inhibiting pregnancy. As usual, my results came back normal.
January 2021, I was excited to try again but with that fear of a repeat failure hanging over my head. My transfer date ended up being scheduled for the day after my 36th birthday. Kaleb was going to stay home to save money, but he decided to come with me to Albany so that I wouldn’t have to be alone. That birthday hit me hard. Spending the day quarantined in a hotel room mid-pandemic awaiting my second IVF transfer was not how I could have ever imagined it. How am I 36 right now and still childless? We had planned to be on our way to our second child by now. Unfortunately, we found out a week later that transfer also failed. The news was a little easier to take this time, but it was still very difficult. After that fail, we decided to do something big and adopted our puppy Jordi. She really helped me work through my emotions and take my mind off the harsh reality of our situation. We're now finding ourselves heading into our second retrieval which we have planned for April 2021. I’m trying to remain hopeful despite all the disappointment and failures.
Our whole marriage has been defined by infertility thus far, and there is still no end in sight. Infertility is such a cruel isolating painful experience that I know is nearly impossible to understand unless you've been through it. On top of that, much of our experience has been through a pandemic which has left us feeling isolated in our own world of infertility. I am not the same person as when I started this journey, I sometimes feel like a broken shell of the person I used to be. It’s been agonizing over the last few years seeing one pregnancy announcement after another, wondering if we’ll ever get the chance to share good news. Trying so hard to feel happiness for others more fortunate while battling with my own feelings of despair. I wish this on no one, but sadly I know we’re not alone; 1 in 8 couples experience infertility. Yet many suffer behind closed doors as there is still such a stigma about the topic leaving people feeling ashamed or embarrassed.
In addition to infertility, IVF is a trying experience with countless injections, painful bruises, last minute appointments, expensive invasive procedures, etc. It’s by far one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. The fact that my clinic is located halfway across the country has been another added challenge. I’ve had to learn to self-advocate and really be on top of my own treatment. If we can be thankful for something, it’s that we’ve found an amazing network online of others helping each other navigate through the IVF process. It takes a huge toll emotionally, physically, and mentally, but it helps to have a support network of others going through the same trauma.
Many people believe IVF is the miracle cure for infertility, but there are no guarantees. Nothing in the process ever goes as planned and there’s a lot of disappointment along the way. As difficult as the process is, we will not give up. We are fighting so hard to bring home baby Lindsey, please help us make this a reality!
Here is our story:
We got married in September 2018, and we were so excited to start growing our family right away. I was 33 at the time and was already getting a later start than I had ever wanted for myself. I could never have imagined the long painful road we had waiting ahead of us.
After months of nothing happening, we started growing concerned. We finally decided to go into the doctor to seek some answers. After many tests, it was decided that we should give intrauterine insemination (IUI) a try. By the time we got started with IUI, it was October 2019 and we had hit our one-year mark of trying. I was already growing impatient at this point but felt hopeful that this would be how we would finally get our baby. We went through three months in a row of treatment and nothing happened. It was heartbreaking. We knew our only option after that would be IVF. We decided to give it one last try before moving on, then the pandemic hit and delayed us. After a few months on hold we were able to try again, but that one failed as well.
In May 2020, we had our first IVF consult with our local clinic. It sounded so promising but came with a $25,000 price tag. We had a really hard time with the thought of spending that much for just one cycle. I did some research and ended up finding an affordable clinic in New York that offered remote monitoring, called CNY.
I was so sure after only one retrieval and transfer we would have our baby. We had our first retrieval in November 2020 in Albany, NY. Out of the 10 eggs retrieved, 7 were mature, 7 fertilized, and 4 made it to blastocyst stage, and a week later we transferred 2 embryos. Right before Thanksgiving, we found out that our first transfer had failed. It was truly devastating news for me. I spent the next week taking time for myself and doing whatever I wanted. I’ve been on so many restrictions over the last year while doing fertility treatments, that it felt nice to have a small break for myself. We decided to take December off and do a hysteroscopy which is a procedure that looks inside the uterus to rule out any issues that may be inhibiting pregnancy. As usual, my results came back normal.
January 2021, I was excited to try again but with that fear of a repeat failure hanging over my head. My transfer date ended up being scheduled for the day after my 36th birthday. Kaleb was going to stay home to save money, but he decided to come with me to Albany so that I wouldn’t have to be alone. That birthday hit me hard. Spending the day quarantined in a hotel room mid-pandemic awaiting my second IVF transfer was not how I could have ever imagined it. How am I 36 right now and still childless? We had planned to be on our way to our second child by now. Unfortunately, we found out a week later that transfer also failed. The news was a little easier to take this time, but it was still very difficult. After that fail, we decided to do something big and adopted our puppy Jordi. She really helped me work through my emotions and take my mind off the harsh reality of our situation. We're now finding ourselves heading into our second retrieval which we have planned for April 2021. I’m trying to remain hopeful despite all the disappointment and failures.
Our whole marriage has been defined by infertility thus far, and there is still no end in sight. Infertility is such a cruel isolating painful experience that I know is nearly impossible to understand unless you've been through it. On top of that, much of our experience has been through a pandemic which has left us feeling isolated in our own world of infertility. I am not the same person as when I started this journey, I sometimes feel like a broken shell of the person I used to be. It’s been agonizing over the last few years seeing one pregnancy announcement after another, wondering if we’ll ever get the chance to share good news. Trying so hard to feel happiness for others more fortunate while battling with my own feelings of despair. I wish this on no one, but sadly I know we’re not alone; 1 in 8 couples experience infertility. Yet many suffer behind closed doors as there is still such a stigma about the topic leaving people feeling ashamed or embarrassed.
In addition to infertility, IVF is a trying experience with countless injections, painful bruises, last minute appointments, expensive invasive procedures, etc. It’s by far one of the hardest things I’ve ever done. The fact that my clinic is located halfway across the country has been another added challenge. I’ve had to learn to self-advocate and really be on top of my own treatment. If we can be thankful for something, it’s that we’ve found an amazing network online of others helping each other navigate through the IVF process. It takes a huge toll emotionally, physically, and mentally, but it helps to have a support network of others going through the same trauma.
Many people believe IVF is the miracle cure for infertility, but there are no guarantees. Nothing in the process ever goes as planned and there’s a lot of disappointment along the way. As difficult as the process is, we will not give up. We are fighting so hard to bring home baby Lindsey, please help us make this a reality!
Organizer
Kelsey Lindsey
Organizer
Minneapolis, MN