Help Elizabeth and Isabella Honor Troy's Memory

Hi, my name is Elizabeth (and our daughter Isabella), a we are struggling with the loss of the rock of our family. Troy and I were married for over 24 years. He was a very sick man over the past 3+ years. First it was renal failure and peritoneal dialysis at home that started in August of ‘21. Then we found out that his heart was very sick. He was having minor heart attacks and either didn’t know it or just “sucked it up” as he would say because he had shit to do. After his big toe was amputated in May ‘23 his life just slid downhill faster than any of us thought would happen. His left leg, below the knee, was amputated in June ‘23 and he was walking on his prosthetic leg by Halloween. He started having fluid overload (congestive heart failure) shortly after that. His nephrologist would adjust his dialysis to accommodate the extra fluid but he always ended up in the hospital.

He had a defibrillator implanted in his chest in October ’24 but ended up in the hospital in November for 15 days with CHF and multiple infections on his body. Three of those were on this right foot and the antibiotics were not working. He was scheduled for his right leg to be amputated on December 13th, and it went well. He was too sick for general anaesthesia so they did a block and sedated him. Five days later they transferred him to the Intensive Rehabilitation Center at Good Sam. Three days into rehab, Troy had a heart attack. The hospital moved him to the Critical Care unit and he was placed on a medication that is only administered via IV and it can only be administered in the ICU/CCU. This medication was to keep his blood pressure up because it was tanking. After over a week, they started tittering him off of it, to determine if his body could hold his pressure with oral medication. He did pretty good for many days but it really didn’t matter, him and I knew that his days were numbered. On January 10th he was not in a good headspace (I think he knew his time was near). Our son visited him for a few hours and they had a nice chat. I got there around 4:30pm and Isabella was not far behind me. We sat and talked, Troy was always one for making jokes. Bella left with her best friend around 6ish to run some errands. So it was just Troy and I. By this point he was fairly out of it (no medication, just his body choosing sleep so his major functions were still working. I sat there with him, just quietly studying his face for the last time, holding his hand and trying to be strong. He woke up about 11pm and seemed like his normal self, except that he kept having what appeared to be breathing problems but were actually his heart off normal beat (PVC’s) and it was causing him so much pain. He went into V-tach again which prompted a rapid response call. 20 doctors and nurses were in the room doing what they could. I forgot to say that he was moved out of CCU and onto a regular patient floor late the night before. After the rapid response situation, he was moved to PCU. He woke again and told me that he didn’t want to go but that he was in so much pain. I told him that we all knew that he loved us and that he knows that so many people love him. It’s okay to let go and not be in pain anymore. We called in his nurse and he let her know that he was changing his DNR. Originally it was no CPR or ventilation but after we talked a little, he now wanted just comfort care. The dialysis nurse came in and I asked Troy “no dialysis either?” He said no dialysis. His nurse asked us a few more questions then said she would go call the doctor.

He was so scared but I told him it was okay, as I held him in my arms. He died in my arms, just the two of us. The nurse came back into the room and I told he that he’s gone, he was no longer breathing. The only that was going on was his defibrillator/pacemaker was pacing his heart. It didn’t matter he was dead at 3:15am on 1/11/2025.

I need financial help, for the services to get him cremated and to have a celebration of life for him. We both are disabled, him just the past 3 years but me, I’ve been disabled for 15 years. Our daughter, who just turned 18 two weeks ago and is neurodivergent, is still in high school. She has a great team of teachers, her counselor, and the social worker at school. They all knew this was eminent. She also has a therapist which is great for her.

Once Troy had to leave his profession in construction we have been just making our bills. We’ve spent our savings and now Isabella and I need help.

Anything you can help with would be appreciated. Once Troy is cremated, I will plan a Celebration of Life for him in the early spring. In the meantime, we will work to get through this as best we can. However, anyone who knew Troy knows that he leaves an imprint on your heart that lasts forever.

Rest in Love my sweet Husband