Help me keep my children safe!!!
Donation protected
I am coming to you today to tell a story. My story. One of physical, emotional and sexual abuse. And how I am fighting to protect myself and my children from suffering the same thing again.
I have been a victim since I can remember. Raped by my stepfather for years. Not believed by anyone and then dragged through the courts and treated like a criminal myself, although I was only 14 when I spoke out about my abuse. I was placed in a children's home and abandoned by the South African care system. I worked my way through high school gaining two distinctions... got a job and a few years later married the man of my dreams - or so I thought...
My Prince turned out to be a frog... A bully, an alcoholic. Vicious. The violence started while I was still pregnant with my eldest daughter and continued for years... escalating to sexual violence and continuing up until the last. And yet I still loved him. I still tried to save us. All of us.
I was born in the UK. Yet I lived in south africa since I was 8. My husband and I agreed due to the brutal violence and crime and breakdown of South Africa we would come back to the UK to settle here... 10 days before we left my husband sexually assaulted me again. I was devastated. I still firmly believed he could get the help he needed here in the UK.
Boy was I wrong. 2 days after we landed in the UK. My husband violently assaulted me again. Kicking me and draghing me around my mothers front room by my hair. It took my mother phoning the police for him to leave my mother's house... then he fled back to south africa. Taking all of our money with him. I had nothing but our clothes and a few possessions.
The children and I remained here in the UK.
It wasn't long after his return he filed a charge of child abduction against me. I turned to the government for help. I was turned down benefits as I had been out of the country for too long and was not habitually resident until I had been back at least 12 week's. So My mother disabled, and on benefits supported the 3 of us in her one bedroomed flat from may until September. With nothing but a single food voucher from the DWP. I found a job and was able to take off the strain. And help repay the debts incurred.
The suit came to light and I applied for legal aid. I was given an emergency certificate and we went to the high Court where the judge ruled that my mental state now and should I return to south africa with my children would be intolerable for them. And their father would not do the things he had promised in court... ie not abuse me and financially support me and the children. There is no welfare in south africa. And refused his application for appeal.
Then they rescinded my legal aid certificate stating I now earn too much money to qualify. I am up to my eyeballs in debt. As is my family. We have been teying to survive this and fight this with everything we have. To keep the girls in the UK where they are safe.
My girls had never been to a park before we came to the UK it's just too dangerous in south africa. Our house had electric fencing and burglar bars at all the windows. My girls are flourishing here and are devastated that they might have to go back to south africa. Aged 4 and aged 6, I have tried to prepare them for the worst. And my daughter is blaming herself. She was interviewed by the cafcass officers court appointed and did not want to get her daddy into trouble by telling them what she had seen him do. She blames herself for this. Of course I told her this isn't the case and that I'm fighting this with all I have.
So now his application for appeal has been granted by the high Court of appeals and we have to face this again on November. Date unknown as of yet.
The legal fees and my medical bills have been crippling. And we have nothing left to fight this with. If I can't raise this money somehow. I enter into this alone, with no legal representation. It's £2000 for them to prep my legal documentation. The rest is pure fees for representation from a barrister and my solicitor. I have contacted many firms and no one is willing to help pro bono.
So with this I appeal to you to help me. Help me fight to keep my girls safe. Break the cycle of abuse. I have been told I can finally appeal for outside help but I am not allowed to make my children's identities known.
I fear for our lives should we return to South Africa. Please help me. Any contribution will help be it £1, $1 etc.
I have been a victim since I can remember. Raped by my stepfather for years. Not believed by anyone and then dragged through the courts and treated like a criminal myself, although I was only 14 when I spoke out about my abuse. I was placed in a children's home and abandoned by the South African care system. I worked my way through high school gaining two distinctions... got a job and a few years later married the man of my dreams - or so I thought...
My Prince turned out to be a frog... A bully, an alcoholic. Vicious. The violence started while I was still pregnant with my eldest daughter and continued for years... escalating to sexual violence and continuing up until the last. And yet I still loved him. I still tried to save us. All of us.
I was born in the UK. Yet I lived in south africa since I was 8. My husband and I agreed due to the brutal violence and crime and breakdown of South Africa we would come back to the UK to settle here... 10 days before we left my husband sexually assaulted me again. I was devastated. I still firmly believed he could get the help he needed here in the UK.
Boy was I wrong. 2 days after we landed in the UK. My husband violently assaulted me again. Kicking me and draghing me around my mothers front room by my hair. It took my mother phoning the police for him to leave my mother's house... then he fled back to south africa. Taking all of our money with him. I had nothing but our clothes and a few possessions.
The children and I remained here in the UK.
It wasn't long after his return he filed a charge of child abduction against me. I turned to the government for help. I was turned down benefits as I had been out of the country for too long and was not habitually resident until I had been back at least 12 week's. So My mother disabled, and on benefits supported the 3 of us in her one bedroomed flat from may until September. With nothing but a single food voucher from the DWP. I found a job and was able to take off the strain. And help repay the debts incurred.
The suit came to light and I applied for legal aid. I was given an emergency certificate and we went to the high Court where the judge ruled that my mental state now and should I return to south africa with my children would be intolerable for them. And their father would not do the things he had promised in court... ie not abuse me and financially support me and the children. There is no welfare in south africa. And refused his application for appeal.
Then they rescinded my legal aid certificate stating I now earn too much money to qualify. I am up to my eyeballs in debt. As is my family. We have been teying to survive this and fight this with everything we have. To keep the girls in the UK where they are safe.
My girls had never been to a park before we came to the UK it's just too dangerous in south africa. Our house had electric fencing and burglar bars at all the windows. My girls are flourishing here and are devastated that they might have to go back to south africa. Aged 4 and aged 6, I have tried to prepare them for the worst. And my daughter is blaming herself. She was interviewed by the cafcass officers court appointed and did not want to get her daddy into trouble by telling them what she had seen him do. She blames herself for this. Of course I told her this isn't the case and that I'm fighting this with all I have.
So now his application for appeal has been granted by the high Court of appeals and we have to face this again on November. Date unknown as of yet.
The legal fees and my medical bills have been crippling. And we have nothing left to fight this with. If I can't raise this money somehow. I enter into this alone, with no legal representation. It's £2000 for them to prep my legal documentation. The rest is pure fees for representation from a barrister and my solicitor. I have contacted many firms and no one is willing to help pro bono.
So with this I appeal to you to help me. Help me fight to keep my girls safe. Break the cycle of abuse. I have been told I can finally appeal for outside help but I am not allowed to make my children's identities known.
I fear for our lives should we return to South Africa. Please help me. Any contribution will help be it £1, $1 etc.
Organizer
Kerry Bishop
Organizer