Help Cyborg dad regain custody

My name is Rich Lee. In 2008 I found my passion in life: using technology to augment the human experience. This passion borrows from many areas like biohacking, grinding, transhumanism, body modification, electronics, neurology, cybernetics, and more. In 2013 I had implants installed in my ears as part of a series of cyborg audio experiments which allowed me to hear heat, detect distant footsteps, and many other cool things. Some people think it is strange and that's ok. I've had the opportunity to speak on the topic internationally, I've been on TV shows, and done many interviews. My kids (age 9 & 12) love it. They were always excited to introduce their friends to their cyborg dad.

I got divorced in 2015 and have shared a one week custody rotation with my ex since the divorce was finalized. I've tried staying on good terms with her, employing the "gray rock" strategy whenever possible. I bought our marital home and spent a lot of money to make it nice for the kids and so they could continue to live in a familiar setting. Being a single income household in a town with the second lowest wages in the nation is tough, and I've struggled to make ends meet. Despite that, we were happy.

On September 24th I installed a thin tube of non-Newtonian armor in my shins to see how well it would protect bones from an impact. This upset my ex for some reason, and on September 28th she failed to return the kids to my house. She sent me a text saying that I'd never have custody of my children again. I got the police involved, but it seems that our terribly worded divorce decree had given her a legal loophole to do this. 

I immediately hired an attorney and filed a motion for supplemental parentage with the court. Her attorney responded saying that I was an unfit parent because I am "into a form of self mutilation called biohacking". She filed her own motion asking for all decision making authority and sole custody of the kids. I'd still get visitation but I'd be prohibited from "exposing the children to his biohacking/transhuman/grinder lifestyle."

This has been horrible on the kids who are in distress about the situation. They love both parents equally and want to live with both of us. I've never exposed them to any implantation procedure (but many kids their age are hunting and gutting deer, which is far gorier to me). They used to think I was an awesome dad with super powers, but now they have been told I am a self-mutilating parent with a problem and that they are victims for seeing the stitches in my legs. I've also suffered. I can't sleep well, I've had panic attacks, and worry has killed my appetite. I have lost 20 pounds since the ordeal began.

I've always tried to tell them that body differences are not something to be feared. Sometimes those differences are intentional and sometimes those differences happen at birth or due to circumstance. But a body doesn't dictate how much empathy someone deserves or let you judge the content of their character. I have friends from all races, some with tattoos, piercings, and other body mods. I have trans friends, skinny friends, fat friends, amputee friends, and friends who need dental work. I strongly believe that one's body is theirs to what they want with. I choose to customize mine with through various technological interventions. That does not make me an unfit parent and shouldn't make my kids love me less. I fear that the courts system in my small conservative town will not understand that parents being into body modification and biohacking ARE NOT FORMS OF CHILD ABUSE.

I want my family back and I need help. Things were tight before, but now 30% of my wages are being withheld for child support and even more will be going toward attorney fees. My poor kids could use an unbiased therapist and some X-mas presents from their dad. The courts are backed up and I'm told I might not get a hearing until February. Most of the money will go toward my attorney fees. My highest priority is getting an untainted therapist, and the rest is to help keep my home out of foreclosure until my court date.

I'm a good dad and my kids need me in their lives. If you help me out I will be eternally grateful. I'd be willing to speak at events, help brainstorm...whatever I can do let me know. Or, if I ever strike it big I'll repay you tenfold. Thanks for you consideration!

(I adjusted my goal. It looks likely that a custody evaluation will be ordered which will add an additional $4,000 expense :( bummer)

Donations (85)

  • Karen Oosterbaan
    • $300 
    • 4 yrs


Rich Lee
Washington, UT

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