Family is a gift.
As many of you know, Lindsey and I have desired to have a family of our own for the past four years that we have been married. The physical and emotional setbacks we have been faced with have left us navigating the limited options of creating a family of our own. Through the struggles of Lindsey’s childhood Leukemia, thyroid cancer, miscarriages, and complications from the pre-eclampsia that resulted in the loss of our son Will who was born at 22 weeks, we are unable to carry additional children of our own without incurring significant risk to Lindsey’s kidneys and overall wellbeing. We spent months looking at a variety of options ranging from surrogacy to public, foreign and domestic adoption. We had many heart-to-heart conversations discerning both if we were ready and what we thought we wanted. It wasn’t until we met with an experienced surrogate seeking to help another couple that we seriously considered moving forward. She was a connection through the grief group Lindsey has been of part of since we lost Will.
We have known for some time that having a family would not be an easy road financially. After looking into anticipated costs, we were hesitant to pursue this route. Though we’ve actively been saving money for this purpose - since even before we lost Will, the final estimate is still more than we’re able to take on alone. Lindsey was given a gift from a classmate’s grandpa when she was sick with Leukemia and that has accrued some value, and we are also looking at using our home equity. A few of the significant expenses for this include: purchasing donor eggs (Lindsey’s are not a viable option), surrogate personal/medical expenses and lawyer fees. The idea of asking for help, especially financial help, was not something that came easily to us – not until one of our family members said it this way:“You don’t know what it’s like for all of us to watch you both struggle. You don’t know how helpless we are left feeling. This (GoFundMe) gives us the opportunity to be able to DO something.”
Hearing our situation put that way allowed us to look past our issues and to see it more for its intention – to foster kindness
. Whether it is prayers
, kind words
, or financial gifts
, we want you to know how grateful we are and humbled we feel as we seek your assistance to take this next step in our journey to create our family.
With much love,
Pete and Lindsey
If you would care to know more about our journey over past several years, below are several of Lindsey’s Facebook posts. They’ve documented many of the challenges that we’ve faced together. https://www.facebook.com/lindsey.ellenbecker/posts/10102763657367478
It’s March Againhttps://www.facebook.com/lindsey.ellenbecker/posts/10102765064223128
20th Anniversary Cancerhttps://www.facebook.com/lindsey.ellenbecker/posts/10102769675626838
Will’s due date