Alondra : Starting Over

Hi there, my name is Alondra and I am a 26 year old single mother to two boys, 5 & 3 years old. For the past 8 years, I have tried surviving being in the hands of a narcissistic abuser. I had every help waiting for me on the other side of my enclosed mindset. However, only a survivor knows the closed path may seem when you’ve lived in a toxic environment for so long that you get used to the idea that has been drilled in your head: you’re not worthy of living a better life. I couldn’t even paint a glimpse of what living again felt like. Everyone is alive, but not everyone is living.

July 31, 2023: As I look down to find my boys’ looking up at me with worrisome after their father had yelled at me for a reason I cannot remember, I started packing up my small amount of clothes and some hygienic products and I fit what I could in my SUV. It was time. It was my first step to living a life with purpose alongside my boys.

I’ve always been hesitant to ask for help. Maybe because I couldn’t when I was living with my ex. However, I have learned that it takes a village. There’s nothing wrong with asking for help when you know you need to get yourself back up. I’ve just been at war for a while. I need help starting over. And that is what I’m asking. To anyone who knows what it feels like to be alone, as a single mom, and brainwashed, I just ask any spare change to help me get back up and pay for rent and electric bills. After being a stay at home mom for 5 years (because I was prohibited to work when I was with my ex), I finally got a job at a trampoline park, which I love!! Yet, I won’t settle for less. My life goal is to go back to school to become a phlebotomist. Your past does not define you. You learn from it. I chose not to stay there. I don’t live there anymore. So, now I am generating a better life for myself and my kids.

Hopefully my message to other women and men is a sign that there are happy endings after a nightmare. It’s all about taking the first step out. Literally.

God Bless you all!