Kimmie & Ray: Help Us Adopt

Our Story: Click play to learn more about our journey.

Dear Family & Friends,
In lieu of accepting wedding gifts, we have chosen to create a special fund for a cause near and dear to our hearts – Infant Adoption. After falling in love and building a beautiful life together, Ray and I are ready to share that love with a child. In November of 2014, we suffered a heart-breaking pregnancy loss at 15 weeks. Since that time we've been unable to conceive — enduring years of infertility and four rounds of unsuccessful procedures.

Throughout this journey, our love and commitment to one another never wavered. Together we surmounted every struggle and rose above every heartbreak, honoring the wise words of Kimmie's late father Rod Fadem (not to mention Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.!): "We shall overcome."

After taking the time to mourn and accept our loss, Ray and I came to the realization that we don’t need to be biological parents, or give birth to a child, in order to become parents.

We've made the decision to expand our family via the domestic Infant Adoption Program at Boys & Girls Aid, the oldest child welfare agency in the state of Oregon.  It is our greatest wish to provide a supportive, stable, joyous, and permanent home for a newborn.

Our application to Boys & Girls Aid was submitted on February 1, 2018. We are currently scheduled for intake and a home study in late fall of 2018. The entire process will likely take at least 2 years from that point.

                                                                                                     *     *     *     *     *

As you may know, the cost of adopting a child is staggering. Below are  the (6) steps for the domestic adoption of an infant through Boys & Girls Aid. Your support will go directly towards funding one of these stages. We deeply appreciate your any amount. Every dollar brings us closer to our goal.


     * Processing and initial assessment of applicants.
     * Infant Adoption Preparedness Training.
     *Intake Interview: Additional assessment of the applicants' readiness and appropriateness.

     *Clinical review of questionnaires.
     *Interviews of applicants and home visit.
     *Consultation and guidance in preparing for adoption as well as interviews and the home visit(s).
     *Detailed assessment of a family's appropriateness as an adoptive resource.

     PROGRAM ENTRY FEE: $8,000
     *Counseling for prospective birthparents.
     *Pregnancy–related birthparent expenses
     *Birthparent outreach to hospitals, clinics, midwives, and social service agencies.
     *Working cooperatively with other agencies and attorneys.
     *Public education and outreach.

     *Consultation, counseling, mediation, and planning services for adoptive parents and birthparents.
     *Pregnancy–related birth expenses.

     *Minimum of two post–placement supervision home visits with adoptive family and adoptee.
     *Preparation of an Oregon Court Report and coordination with the adoption attorney.
     *Post–Placement support for openness between adoptive and birth families.

     *Lifetime coordination of picture and letter exchanges.
     *Lifetime referral services for adoption–related concerns.
     *Lifetime medical updates for adoptee and birth family.



Over the past few years, we have fallen madly in love with our nieces and nephew on both coasts, who brighten our lives. Kimmie's Side: Rose and Fiona Kashinsky (pictured above) in Portland, OR. Ray's Side: Finola, Connor, and Rowan Donlon in Reston, VA.

When Kimmie's sister Michelle and her husband Josh (Kashinsky) moved here to Portland nearly two years ago, Rosie and Fifi (now 5 & 3) officially crowned us "Auntie Mermaid-Face & Uncle Raymond."

It has been the greatest gift to become a constant part of the girls' weekly lives. Our wild, imaginative, large-than-life adventures with them are documented in the Our Story video above.

Witnessing precious moments like Fiona learning to crawl for the first time on our shag carpet, and Rosie telling the entire story of "The Giving Tree," have only reinforced our desire to bring a child into our lives.

On our second date, we sat side-by-side on a wooden porch swing and ate homemade popsicles.

I'll never forget the moment when Ray leaned in for a first kiss at my car...and then a second. He had Clark Kent hair and dreamy blue eyes that radiated sincerity. In the next months we fell into the sweetest of loves.

One the evening of our first anniversary, at the site of our first date, Ray asked me to marry him. It was the gift of a lifetime to be 40 & the kindest and most wonderful man I'd ever met.

Here's to Late Bloomers. Here's to knowing when things are right. Here's to waiting for true love. Here's to finding happiness.

And here's to the next chapter – finding our child.

With Much Love,

(On behalf of Kimmie & Ray)

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Kimmie Fadem 
Portland, OR
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