"Landon and I didn't start off with the clichÃ© love story. There was no "Oh I knew it was love at first sight". To be honest, it was far from that. Our paths always seemed to cross but never at the right time, until February of 2007. We dated for a short amount of time before we got engaged and exactly one year and two days from our first date, we got married. We've been married for six years now and while it hasn't always been easy it's most definitely been worth it. I knew I wanted children of my own after my nephew Jacob was born but marrying Landon and starting a life with him confirmed that decision for me.
We decided that we would let nature take its course for the first year, I mean why not, we're both young and healthy so in our minds there should be NO worries:well we couldn't have been more wrong. During that time there were "detours" that we were made to take due to having several health issues and numerous surgeries which made us put our family plan on the back burner for a while.
We were finally back on track physically and mentally so we felt like we were ready to start trying again. After several unsuccessful attempts we were advised to see a fertility specialist. WOW what a punch in the stomach to hear that the one special gift that a husband and wife are suppose to be able to give each other has to be helped along by medicine. As we all know, the Good Lord tells us to be patient and wait on his timing for his blessings. I'm one for instant gratification so I decided I'd push until I got my way..sorry but life doesn't work that way.
January of 2012 we started Clomid along with deciding to do an IUI (Intra Uterine Insemination) so after what seemed like two of the longest weeks ever, the doctor suggested we take a HPT to see if the IUI was successful..just our luck the test came out negative..again I was furious because I couldn't determine the outcome.
March 1st 2012-What I thought was a pinched nerve resulted in me being sent to several different doctors for different opinions and finally ending up at the ER. After being there for almost six hours the nurse comes in and says "Mrs. Wagner do you know you're pregnant"? I'm sorry what did you JUST say? All of the emotions over the past several years all rolled into this one moment of happiness. I was sent for several scans and ultrasounds and at 10:30 that night I was being pushed in an OR for emergency surgery due to the pregnancy being in the tube and causing it to rupture..complete happiness to total devastation in less than three hours time. Landon and I went home to nurse our wounds and rethink our future plans for a family.
After eight months of consideration we decided to try one more time. We researched the doctor that performed my surgery and were able to get in to see her and discuss our options. She put us on a fertility plan of different medications, shots and numerous trips for blood work and ultrasounds. We were scared but hopeful that this would work because all the signs were pointing up for us.
February 6, 2013- after all the shots, meds, mood swings and emotional rollercoaster rides....it was time to do the egg retrieval.
February 9, 2013- two of the ten embryos retrieved had grown beautifully and were ready to be transferred. Everything went off without a glitch. Everything was great except for the waiting, waiting and more waiting.
February 20th, 2013- At 2:21 that afternoon I received THE phone call. It was my doctor with the POSITIVE news that Landon and I had been waiting for. We were pregnant!! After sharing the news with our anxiously awaiting family and friends, we couldn't wait to get started on making our home ready for Baby Wagner. Hearing and seeing our baby's heartbeat for the first time is indescribable. It truly is the most precious thing you will ever see.
May 17, 2013 - IT'S A BOY!!! Gender Reveal day: We took our nephew Jacob with us because after all, he was what started this whole process that many years ago. Everything is finally going in the direction that we've prayed so hard for and God promised that it would go. Each doctor visit is good news. The baby is growing like he should, healthy heartbeat and all is well with Mom and Baby.
July 16, 2013- I go in for my regular checkup and to do the dreaded Glucose test. I had an ultrasound first. The baby is kicking and carrying on as far as I can see. The OB/GYN comes in and asks if I am feeling well. "Yeah, I feel fine other than being tired." I was then informed that I would be sent to Labor and Delivery to be admitted. Everything went into a tailspin after that. I was hooked up to several different monitors, no movement for the first 24 hours in case I had to go in early delivery and I was given a shot to help Keene's lungs develop quickly. At the 24 hour mark my doctor comes in to say that all is ok with the baby and me, so they are going to put me on bed rest for the next nine weeks. Nine weeks in the hospital. No more driving, working or going on with every day routines. Yes, it sounded like a good plan at first but after day two of the confinement I was ready to run away.
Each day I would wake up to hear our sweet boy's heart beat and movement and every night I would go through the same routine. I was finally calm and ready to stay for the long haul just as long as Keene was going to be healthy and we could take him home at some point. I could breathe easier and felt a huge weight lifted when I got the thumbs up from the doctors and staff each day.
July 22, 2013 - the day that our whole world stopped and we felt the greatest heartache that anyone will ever experience. It was a normal day. Landon went to work, family visited for a while and I rested. Landon came in from work to our "home away from home". We took our walk around the floor, had dinner and finally settled in for the night. At 8:30 that night the nurse came in to do our heartbeat monitor and movement scan:all was well. At 11:31 the nurse comes in as expected. Everything felt off. Not the normal "oh he's being stubborn and running from the Doppler" off. I went in to a complete panic not understanding what was happening. The on call doctor was paged in and what seemed to be at least six nurses and doctors that I didn't recognize came in at once to do an ultrasound of Keene. My heart felt like it was being pulled out of my chest for what that ultrasound showed:a tiny little silhouette that I had carried for six and a half months. My sweet baby that I had felt kick, wiggle, squirm and change my life forever with its precious heartbeat, stubborn attitude and handsome smile like his Daddy....was gone.
Landon had to make the dreaded phone calls to our families to let them all know. Who wants a devastating phone call like that at 12:30 on a Tuesday morning? As we cried, screamed and begged for the doctors to be able to do something, our precious families filed in one by one to be there for us, to console, to cry to and to pray with. As if that wasn't hard enough, the doctors then advised us that I would need to deliver Keene. Again in less than two hours time we have been delivered life altering news and there is nothing we can do about it. After thirteen hours of being in labor we finally had our beautiful baby boy that will forever hold our hearts.
We have been faced with obstacles, detours and mishaps throughout our marriage but if not for our Faith, Family and Friends we wouldn't have made it nor would we be who we are today. We could be bitter, angry and question God but our strong Faith will not allow that. We've been asked... if we were given the opportunity to be able to go through IVF again would we do it? Absolutely.... without a doubt we would. There is no greater feeling than being blessed with a child.
Thank you for reading our story, if you are able to make a donation to help us fund our next IVF procedure, we are forever grateful. If not, we ask that you keep us in your prayers."
Kara and Landon Wagner
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