Running with WayneMy dad had a sign in his shop that said, "The good stuff happens outside your comfort zone." So this is me, going outside my comfort zone:

One year ago today (March 10th), I was winding down a month’s long training program to try and qualify for the Boston Marathon. After having narrowly missed punching my ticket the year before, I knew I had what it would take to finally achieve the dream. I was one week out from my goal marathon, the Richmond Marathon, and was feeling great.
Unfortunately, that day I received a devastating phone call that my father had passed away. My brother and I dropped everything and headed to Michigan to be with Mom, my goals could wait. It was in that moment that running changed for me. Before that, running was just a way to blow off steam, prove to myself that I could do something, and keep myself in shape during the winter while not riding my bike. After that day, running became something much more.
Running became my mechanism of processing my grief. It was a place to be alone with my thoughts and memories of my father. A place to pound out my anger, cry out my grief and exhaust myself of the negative emotions. Running wasn’t something I wanted to do for my health and ego, it became something I HAD to do just to get through my day. A place to let it all out so I could get home and put a smile on for the girls and be a good father to my own children. I still get emotional when I run, especially when doing a hard workout. Maybe that'll stop someday. Maybe I don't want it to.
I missed my goal marathon due to Dad’s memorial, but I needed to qualify for Boston more than anything now. I’m a relatively new runner, and due to being stationed far from Michigan, my parents have never had the opportunity to see me run. I had hoped to eventually qualify for a big marathon like Boston or New York, and invite my parents there to see me finish… Now it was too late for my father.
A month after my father’s memorial service, I lined up at the New Jersey Marathon, determined more than anything to qualify for Boston. After running my heart out for 2 hours and 56 minutes, I finally crossed the finish line, punching my ticket to Boston, and narrowly missing qualifying for New York.
I was crying for most of that marathon, which makes running pretty hard, but I remember utterly balling my eyes out for that last mile, sprinting my ass off, as if I ran fast enough, I could see my dad at the finish. What a weird sight that must have been for all of the people that lined the course that day cheering. A grown man, sprinting his ass off and balling. They must have assumed I was really digging deep to finish strong.
They had no idea.
In just over a month, I’m going to toe the line at the
123rd Boston Marathon. My father won’t be there to cheer me on, but he’ll still be running the race with me. I'll carry the love he showed me in my heart always.
To honor my father, I’m raising money for the
American Diabetes Association. My father suffered from diabetes for much of his later life, and I'm raising funds to donate in his name to help others.
If you have the means, please consider donating a few dollars to the
American Diabetes Association using this page. All proceeds go directly to the association.