A Beareavement Suite for the RSCH

At the beginning of this year our good friends Kirsty and Aston’s life’s were turned upside down when there twin daughter belle was born followed by her sister aria.

Stillbirths are something that you fear and you know can happen but you don’t actually think they will happen to you or people your close too and it is horribly shocking and heartbreaking when it does.

When we found out the serious need for a bereavement suite at the Royal Sussex and the fact they have acknowledged this and are looking to raise enough funds for this we agreed to take part in the sky jump to try and raise money in honour of Kirst and Aston’s girls and the Abigail footsteps charity.

We will also be donating 20% of the total amount raised to be baby Harry fund who help provide life saving equipment for the Trevor Mann unit and the Royal Sussex.

Arran was supposed to be doing this jump but he has bottled it so I’m doing it in he’s place!! I’m extremely nervous and sure I will throw up every where but I’m looking forward to it and pleased that any donations raised are going towards such a good cause.

Any money you can spare to help me raise some funds towards there goal will be much appreciated. See Kirsty and Aston’s story below, which had me in tears all over again when I read it:

2018 started perfectly, we were newlyweds, we had a fantastic christmas with our little boy and we were expecting twin girls in the spring. Little did we know that two weeks later our whole world would be thrown upside down!

We knew things had started to go wrong when Kirsty was having contractions in her 19th week of pregnancy. We were expecting the girls to be born early but we never imagined it could be as early as this. Her waters went at home and we were quickly rushed into hospital. When we arrived on the labour ward a consultant and midwife were ready to greet us. We were carefully told that it was too late to stop the labour and our daughter would die once she was born. We were handed leaflets on funerals and paperwork regarding postmortems, things that only nightmares are made of. A few hours later on 16th January 2018 Belle was born. The staff at the Royal Sussex County were amazing, we dont know how we would have made it through without them. We were provided with a cold cot, this meant that our daughter didn't have to go straight to the mortuary, we could keep her with us until we were ready to say goodbye. Our families came to the hospital to meet her, she was perfect, just small like a little doll.

We were still pregnant with Aria at this point, she was fighting really hard to stay with us. Unfortunately the chances of her survival were low. Twins are often born together and the next 24 hours were crucial. We had to stay in the hospital. There is no ward for parents whos babies hadnt made it. So we had to stay on the labour ward. All we could hear was the sound of women in labour followed by the screams of a newborn babies. When you have just been through the painful experience of labour yourself but your baby makes no sound when they are born it is very difficult to hear those cries. You dont wish your situation on anyone, but it makes it no easier to be around healthy babies whilst your baby is lying next to you, not moving, not crying, just the noise of the refrigerated cot humming in the background.

We stayed in hospital for another 3 days, a standard labour room with blue and white walls, a gym mat for me to sleep on and a crash bed for kirsty - not even a proper hospital bed. We started to get disorientated, we often woke in the night to the noise of a baby crying and naturally went to check on Belle until we would realise we were still in that nightmare we hoped to wake up from. On 19th January our worst fears came true and kirsty again started labouring, our warrior Aria was born.

The Royal Sussex County Hospital have realised that there needs to be a more appropriate ward for parents like us. They are currently trying to raise £50,000.00 for the addition of a maternity bereavement suite with the help of the charity Abigals footsteps. This will provide parents like us a suitable place to be together as a family and grieve our child. We had 4 days with Belle but only a few hours with Aria. This suite would have gone a long way in our emotional recovery.