Kaylee's Surgical Fund
My name is Amanda Moats, and I am writing this for my sister Kaylee Moats, who has been diagnosed with a rare condition called MRKH (Mayer-Rokitansky-Kuster-Hauser Syndrome). We received this crushing news in the doctor’s office when she was 18 years old, after never having a menstrual period. After having a MRI completed, the doctor determined that she did not have a uterus, cervix, vagina or vaginal opening. As you can imagine, it was hard to process all of this information and we were all heartbroken.
As a sister, there was nothing worse than getting that phone call and knowing that my sister’s dreams for her life were changed so drastically in an instant, with nothing I or anyone else could do to make it better.
Kaylee will never be able to carry her own children. The dreams we had of raising families together are going to look a little different than we had initially planned. This diagnosis raises a lot of fears, concerns, and insecurities in Kaylee about her identity and her future. The options of surrogacy and adoption give her some hope but she will never be able to carry her own children. After receiving the news, she decided to focus on school and address the problem later on when she was ready.
Here is some more information on the condition below.
Vaginal agenesis is a congenital disorder of the reproductive system in females that affects approximately 1 in 5,000 females. In this disorder, the uterus and the vaginal canal do not develop properly during the pregnancy and the female is born with a very short vaginal canal or no vagina at all. The condition is typically not detected until puberty when the teenage female is delayed in getting her menses or it may be discovered with first attempts at having sex.
Kaylee just graduated from college in May and knew it was time to get with a doctor and see what could be done. Through many hours of research and direction from the MRKH foundation, we have found two surgeons in the Atlanta area that are well equipped to help. They can perform a surgery that will create a vaginal opening, allowing Kaylee to be able to have an intimate relationship like any other woman would experience. It would give back a part of her that has been missing since birth and dramatically improve her quality of life. The surgery lasts 1-2 hrs and has a 96% success rate. As you can imagine, the whole family was very excited about this and Kaylee was ready to pursue the surgery. After a phone conference with the nurse liaison in Atlanta, we were told that the insurance companies consider this a cosmetic surgery and will not pay for it. We were crushed again as are many of the other hundreds of girls trying to get this surgery completed. We were left unsure about how to proceed, and how to pay for these expenses.
After reading through some of the MRKH blogs, many girls have been able to raise funds through a Go Fund Me page. We have decided to take this path and see what funds we are able to raise to help fulfill Kaylee’s dream. The cost of the surgery is $15,000 plus hotel, counseling and airfare to Atlanta. We would be forever grateful for anything you can donate. No amount is too small. Thank you for getting Kaylee one step closer to her goal and allowing her to have a brighter and happier future.
P.S. Any extra money that comes in will go towards flights, hotel, etc. for our family to be able to accompany Kaylee to Atlanta for her surgery. Furthermore, the money will be used for surrogacy and adoption costs when that time comes. Thank you so much for your continued support.
as a girl with MRKH that just got the surgery three weeks ago, I can honestly say its life changing. Kaylee I am very very very proud of you for not only sharing your story but raising awareness to this condition. positive thinking love and everything will work itself out!
Hopefully you have appealed this decision to the insurance company. They like saying no at least once, and we should always challenge that initial refusal when we know it's wrong. I would also advise that you contact an attorney in order to challenge if you have no already done so. I am a paralegal, and I have successfully challenged for a past surgery that was initially denied as "cosmetic." After bringing a lawyer on board, there was an immediate approval. Best wishes to you.
I am so happy to see you've raised so much! From one fellow MRKH sister to the next. We went the surrogacy route, which didn't work, and are now going through adoption! If you want to be a mother one day, it will happen! Feel free to reach out if you want to vent or talk about MRKH. It doesn't define who we are!
Kaylee, I am the proud father of four wonderful daughters. I read your story, here in England, and I wanted to send you our best wishes for your future operation. You are 100% a woman and we hope our small donation will play a small part it your bright and wonderful future. Big hug from across the ocean.
Kaylee, you have touched so many lives and I want to let you know that we all support you and love you. I know many of us are strangers but we are here for you. If starting a YouTube channel is something that you are interested in. I would definitely subscribe to you. I want to follow your journey, and I know I can speak for many of us. I will definitely donate once my paycheck comes in. Keep strong Kaylee! You are an amazing person . Remember this, how do you change the world? One person at a time!
Hi Kaylee, I saw your story on YouTube, and want to wish you the best. I also want to offer you some advice, in that sex is not limited to penis-in-vagina intercourse. Sex is also kissing, cuddling, touching, massaging, and many many other activities that allow for intimacy. I highly recommend the book "Sex Tips for Straight Women from a Gay Man" as it discusses how the narrow view of what sex is can be problematic, and suggests other ways you can be intimate without penetration. When you have your surgery it will still be some time before you are healed enough to have intercourse, and in the meantime there are plenty of ways you and your boyfriend can make each other feel good! All the best of luck to you.
Really nice, to see you've reached the goal, all the best too you. :) But really, vote for some change over there, in the US... In many countries here in Europe, that operation would have been performed in a state run hospital and fully covered by the taxpaid healthcare.
I don't have any money to help you at the moment because I'm unemployed. =/ But I'm very happy to see that you achieved the amount you needed! ^^ So I just want to say that it doesn't matter the fact that you don't know me... I'm praying for you! I admire your strength and how wonderful you are! You're a marvelous woman! Never feel any less than amazing! And I'm sure the person who will stay by your side will be lucky and intelligent enough to know all that! Love and happiness for you for ever! ❤️
Hi, Kaylee. My friend has the same condition and told me that she used dilators recommended by her doctor and it's worked perfectly without surgery. She's married now and very happy with the outcome. Maybe an option? Much less invasive or expensive than surgery. Good luck!
I had the surgery at 16, which was 40 years ago this summer. The stigma attached to this was awful, and there was no counseling about it at all then. When I was told my diagnosis at15, I just wanted to die. It's a tough thing to deal with, but you can make it through this. You are not alone! I don't have money I can donate to your surgery, but you have all my good wishes. Welcome to the McIndoe club, hon, and just remember, your gender identity is in your head, not in what organs you may or may not have.
Super sad to see this isn't an insurance covered procedure. I can't imagine how difficult this would be to live with. Always know that there are loads of people out there that don't even know you, but are routing for you 100%! You can do this! So incredibly happy for you that you have such a great support system in your family and your boyfriend, that's so great to see!
You are a brave and beautiful woman. You are going to help so many overcome guilt and shame over something easily fixed. Insurance should have stepped up, but I believe research centers would have or teaching hospitals. Hopefully, your coming forward will make that possible for others. God Bless you.