Tragic accident please help family
Hi folks my name is Sonny Vincent. Some of you may know me from my music, tours and albums. . Most don't know my real name, it is Robert Ventura Jr. I need help. On Sunday January 2, 2016 our family was in a tragic accident. My son Rob, Sarah Ventura, and their son ( my grandson) Cayden Ventura (Age 9) were in a gas explosion that ignited into a blazing fire. Their injuries and the burns are extensive, The burns are 3rd degree and emcompas 50% of Robs body,50% of Caydens and the Mom suffers with 80%. They are each currently in the Burn Intensive Care Unit at Winston Salem Medical Center, and are on life support struggling for their lives. The explosion/fire destroyed everything they owned. There are several family members who are here supporting them. I despreartely need urgent assistance in taking care of them.
Please help and share this.
The reason for the infrequency of my updates is because of all going on.
Cayden needed more evaluations and Doctor appointments . It's clear now that although I have tried every resource and contact that Caydens hands are going to be very problematic. They are very knarled and messed up.
I'm totally out of money again. Just woke up in a panic. Please help.
Even within all this Cayden is a very happy boy. He was bugging me to let him do his hair blue! We discussed it- " Cayden you are already a target for staring etc, with a face graft" . He said " I don't care,I'd like it blue!" , then I said " Considering You're going to be going to a new school now maybe you should go there for a week or 2 to check out 'the lay of the land ' and to see how kids are gonna treat you, before you show up with a face graft and body grafts and blue hair!!" . Well he went to school for a couple of weeks and actually made a bunch of new friends and said he still wanted his hair blue. So here are pictures of him in, all his glory, with blue hair!!!
As you know my friends I'm doing my very best over here. It definitely has not been easy for me often. Been so long since I've been able to play, tour or make albums like I used to. I do get depressed about it. It's been over 2 years, I even mentioned to a friend on fb that I should just have a funeral for 'Sonny Vincent'.
Please don't be alarmed though I know I have to be a warrior/ advocate and I just have to do with this stuff.
Aside from all that something that just pushes me into depression is this feeling of uncertainty. I used to be so independent and never asked for anything. Now it's the end of the month and we have difficulty paying our bills. A lot was collected over time but it's all gone to expenses. As I said before I live very modestly. In the house we didn't even run the air conditioner , not even one time this summer because we wanted to save money.
You guys of always helped me out of a jam, Please send what you can every donation is very very helpful. Please use the real name on the card that you're using to donate because a lot of donations are turned back and refunded because the people using nick names on the form. I really hate to ask but you guys have been such angels to us, please help me out keep making this boy happy and help me getting him through this tragedy, He has surgeries coming up and I just spoke to all his teachers about how he's going to miss time in school. They're gonna give me all his work for during the time he misses school for surgeries.
Please continue to support us. One of these days I'll bring Cayden on tour with me and we will be able to thank you personally. It will be so wonderful to see you all! For now please have our backs and help me get through all this. Every donation helps and is so appreciated.
Thanks my friends! Sonny and Cayden !!!
But there are no comprehensive discussions about that. then again I can understand that there is no need for an avenue of discussion because the growth plates simply are closed. Recently I've been seeking out other advice and information. But it seems that all the advice leads to the same conclusion, we can only move forward from this point. it's very heartbreaking to look at Cayden's hands, but as I said we can only move forward from the point his hands are at now, There is no going back to a time when the healthcare system in general could have provided him with better services so his hands now would be in better condition. It's true that there was massive damage done by the fire but it's also true that the ball was dropped and things could have developed better. These days, they do not send burned children to the hospital they sent Cayden to ( for physical therapy ) because (like I said) they have no experience with kids who were severely burn. It's all so complicated and I'm always working so hard fighting the system, fighting so hard trying to get Cayden the best recovery. You guys have no idea how sad I am sometimes and how overworked I am sometimes from all this. I think I have developed PTSD from this experience. When I drive the hundred fifty miles to the hospital with Cayden and I see the name of the city, I already become nervous and in a different state of mind. When I enter the hospital and the nurses and doctors are all in a hustle passing by as Cayden and I navigate through the hallways , I am filled with anxiety, I dont show it, I must be Cayden's strong Grandpa.Its all so tough though. Because of this experience each unknown staff person,nurse and Doctor I see is automatically segregated in my mind as an enemy until they have proven to be an ally. This system is so ruled by money and incompetence it's mind-boggling. All that being said I truly truly do not want to slight or put in a bad light the dedicated Soulful people that have helped. But rather than being a harmonious collaboration between the Health Care system and my family, it's been a combative struggle, for me and them. I thank God they all survived this but this has been a massive struggle and sometimes my soul becomes very weary and threadbare from the constant battle. Cayden's Mom has still has so many problems, she is constantly being let down and the ball is constantly being dropped and her condition suffers from it all. Due to clerical errors her Medicare was stopped twice! As you guys know one of the times that her health insurance was discontinued they sent her away to a place to die.
I am doing my very best to navigate them through all this. It's very very heartbreaking at times but there definitely is a shining light on all of us. Cayden, Sarah and Rob have all survived this tragic accident. The surgeon and many of the staff are wonderful. And I am doing all I possibly can to help them get the best recovery.
Pretty soon Cayden starts school again! I definitely don't look forward to getting up at 6 in the morning each day, but seeing this little boy smile and seeing him so happy is such a great joy. I do have sleepless nights worrying about the future and our financial situation. Cayden needs a whole set of school clothes ans supplies. He gew out of everything!
Once again we are nearly broke and I really need to reach out to you my friends fans and Angels to help us. Please to continue to support us. There are so many costs not covered by Cayden's health insurance. So much of this journey includes costs that I must pay direct. Lately I have been utilizing many outside consultations. The fees are exorbitant when paying out of pocket. And still after all of that massive expense, I am left with the discovery that we can only move forward and do the best we can. We are blessed that his surgeries and his future surgeries are covered with his health insurance. I have confidence that the track we are on is still the best choice. And as I said earlier I have always had confidence in his surgeon. But aside from his ongoing surgeries there are many other costs involved in his recovery, plus all the bills piling up each month. I want to thank you all for helping me manage all this. We are going forward. If we had to depend on the system we be living under a bridge literally.
It's only through your donations and the kindness of all my friends that we are able to move forward. With you guys helping me I can help them reach the best recovery possible. Throughout all this Cayden has been a very joyful boy. He knows what you have all done for him. Thank you so much. Please continue to help us.
Bless you guys, please donate what you can. Lots of Love from Sonny.
Hand reconstruction surgery is very intense and invasive. Cayden made it through. He was less anxious than he was in past surgeries, but none of it is easy on him. Here in the photo you can still see the marker lines the surgeon drew on Cayden's hand just before the surgery. Cayden has advanced so much that he helped with taking the bandages and the cast/splint off himself! We must stay here near the hospital for another couple of days to monitor his hand, in case something goes wrong. Rob comes to Sarah today and the three of them can spend some time together! I'll get a photo of the three of them together!
On Sunday Cayden and I will drive home because on Monday he has his first post surgery hand therapy. Even with the wounds and stitches still there on his hand we must do a lot of special agressive bending and stretching exercises to get maximum motion and function back to his hand. This whole thing over the past few weeks has really been tough. Lots of stress and meetings. Now I must keep his hand free of all infection and get this boy back to riding a bike again!! Thanks for standing beside us my friends. Please continue to support me in taking care of Cayden. As you can imagine the bills and costs are always so much. Someday I will get back to touring and recording but for now its my friends and Angels who protect us. Thank you all so very much. Lots of Love from Sonny
We went on a nature hike and then in the evening we went to a movie (Antman and The Wasp, *thanks Dianne and Mike R !!) . He was super happy to see a movie and he was singing and humming all the way home.Tuesday its another 150 miles drive there to the hospital and 150 miles back. Definitely Cayden will spend some time with his Mom while we are in Winston - Salem! Also Rob Cayden's Dad -my son, will be there together with Cayden and Sarah. Sarah and Rob are doing better and better. Its still a long road to recovery for them, as well, but there is great progress. I'll send photos of the three of them together!
After the hospital appointment and the visit with Sarah and Rob, Cayden and I drive home. Then I must keep Cayden's left hand totally free from any infection and I must begin the movement therapy as well, right away. I must utilize all what I learned throughout the last 2 years and in the Intensive Care Burn Ward. Like I said, I must keep Cayden's left hand free from infections, I have developed methods where I can achieve results at home, similar to the debriding and dressing changing they do at the hospital. Its very important to be focused and 'on point' with this. Any infection could cause him to lose fingers. Cayden and I have met Burn survivors who lost fingers because of infections. I asked one young woman who had also been in a tragic accident a question " what's the one thing that you most regret not doing for your recovery and treatment?" She replied " Not letting my Mom and Dad change my dressings often enough and not doing my hand exercises and Therapy sessions".
That was a huge ' heads up' for me!!
I'm very trained now and experienced in keeping Cayden's hands free from infection and I do his hand excercises all day as well as bringing him to his professional appointments where they do this 3 times per week. Cayden has to be a very strong boy and he is, he has stitches and deep wounds all throughout his hand, but the hand excercises must be done or his hand will freeze in a stiff fixed position. If that were to happen, this time, there would be no getting back to movement.
Please think of us and please help with any donation you can. Although he will have many more surgeries, this one was very major. I have attached a few photos that I took after we saw the movie yesterday! All through this journey Cayden has been a happy boy and a real joy to me. He sends lots of Love to you all!! He knows what you have all done for him through your Love and support.
Thanks for standing beside us throughout this my friends. Please share and please continue to donate.The gas bills for the car alone are a lot. Thanks for helping us get through each month. I know I've said it before but without you guys we would be lost. Look at this boy now!! Remember the early photos?
Thank you and lots of Love from Sonny