My book, "Who is your Provider?"
While seeking God's will for my life back in 2008, He led me into writing a book, "Who is your Provider??"
Before that time, I had been trusting Him for what I needed. He had provided amazingly for the things I asked Him for. I wanted to share everything that He has done with the church. As of now the book is in manuscript form.
I am pursuing a publishing company called, "Christian Faith Publishing". As of now, I don't have money to get it published. God told me that He was going to touch the hearts of many people to help me get this book out. This whole process is a walk of faith.
I wanted to set this page up and put it out there and see what God is going to do. This book is God's, not mine. If God leads you into sowing into this, thank you!
I believe this book will help to lead people into trusting God fully!
The total amount that will get Who is your Provider?? out was $4683. This includes editing, cover design, radio promotions, etc. I put it for $5000 because of any unforseen costs.
Here is an excerpt from one of the chapters entitled, "Money Matters?"
Chapter 5- Money Matters?
”That’s my money!”
“I‘m not going to marry you, you’re poor and your job is pathetic!”
“People tell me that before I marry, I must be financially secure. I thought love is what was important in marriage?”
”I worked for this, I deserve to get what I want with it!”
“You owe me money and I want it!”
It is widely agreed upon that money is needed in our society (as we spoke about earlier). It is the focus of so many people that when starting a job, one of the most widely asked questions is this, “how much will I be paid per hour”? Many of us wouldn’t think of taking a job if the pay was so little, because we’d think we wouldn’t have enough for bills, food, clothing and our children’s expenses.
Who is the main breadwinner?
It’s a subject in which many marriages struggle with. It is a topic of pride when a man finds out his girlfriend or wife makes more money than he does. Or, if a man loses his job and his wife still has hers and she’s “the main bread winner”. As we had discussed, society has placed the burden on the man as being the main provider for the family, so when those expectations aren’t reached, society says, “So, your wife is the main breadwinner?! You have failed and are a terrible husband and father! Get your life in order and be responsible! You should feel ashamed of yourself because your wife is supporting you!”
When a wife is looking to her husband for her needs to be taken care of, then she is more or less dependant on him. The wife for the longest time has put her husband in God‘s place of taking care of her needs when only God can do so, in other words, she‘s making him an idol or god. Anyone who looks to their spouse to care for their needs is setting themselves up to fail because as we know, man fails or unfortunate situations arise like husbands losing their jobs. If you are looking to your spouse to get by, what happens if they end up losing their jobs, how would you feel? Scared? Your first thoughts would probably be,
“what are we going to do? How are we going to make it? They got to do something!”
So their eyes are taken off the love they have for one another and are focused on the worries in their lives, so with panic comes agitation, then nit-picking and criticism.
In Isaiah 2:22 it states, “stop trusting in man, who has but a breath in his nostrils. Of what account is he?”
For so long the world has focused on the importance of money in a relationship and love second. So if the couple brings in a good amount, their relationship will prosper because they won’t have financial worries that will burden them and bring friction to their marriage. But as I’ll be getting to later in this book, where is the focus then? What’s truly important?
In Job 31:24-28 Job mentions how he didn’t place his trust in money and to do such would be sin:
“If I have put my trust in gold or said to pure gold, ‘You are my security,’ if I have rejoiced over my great wealth, the fortune my hands had gained, if I have regarded the sun in its radiance or the moon moving in splendor, so that my heart was secretly enticed and my hand offered them a kiss of homage, then these also would be sins to be judged, for I would have been unfaithful to God on high.”
“If we’re not to look to man for our needs to be taken care of, what about the bills? What if my spouse loses their job? Where are we going to get the money to pay what’s due?”
God. As we had already discussed, God knows our needs and we need to look to Him for everything we need. We’re not to look to our spouses and people we would’ve typically depended on, because unfortunate circumstances come up to where their brooks will dry up. So, if we’re looking to God for our needs, then, and not to our spouses, what’s truly important?
Love and money…
To many people, you can’t live on love anymore because money is what comes up in every discussion,
“how are we going to get by with so little money?”
For many parents who give their daughter away, the focus is making sure the man has enough money to take care of her and their children. If his job doesn’t pay good some would say
“well, he needs to get a new job or two jobs. If not, we don’t think you should marry him, at least until he‘s financially set.”
If they are in love, that doesn’t matter, the man has to have a good income. So when the man hears this, it is a shot to the heart. His self-worth is on the line,
“this is the best I can do right now! It apparently isn’t good enough! I’m not worth having their daughter!”
This would be a perfect time for rejection to hit. Or how about in conversation:
Girl 1: Oh I met a really cool guy recently!
Girl 2: (after discussing how they met it leads into this) Oh really? What does he do? Where does he work?
Girl 1: Oh, he’s a cashier at a supermarket.
Girl 2: Oh…so (he’s already being sized up)…does he have any goals or does he plan on being anything other than a cashier?
Girl 1: Well, he’s definitely ambitious and goal oriented. He’s a really great guy, I know you will like him!
Girl 2: Yeah, he may be, but if you go on dates, can he afford it? Or if you marry down the road, how is that going to work out?
Notice how Girl #1 is so “in love” with this guy that what he did job-wise didn’t matter, yet it mattered to her friend and it does to the world. So a person’s self-worth and identity is determined by what he does. The care for each other isn’t worth anything. Nowadays--to many people--it seems money is the only thing that makes a marriage or relationship work, or is it?
As I was breezing by channels one day, I noticed a reality TV show about this girl who wanted to marry a millionaire. Many different guys from different occupations were chosen for her to select. Well, two guys had to be rejected at the beginning and one of them was a man who worked as a “waiter” while the other was rejected because he didn‘t appeal to her physically.
One of her girlfriends who helped her decide on what men to drop told her of the man who was a waiter, “how’s he going to support you?”, as if this girl was just going to sit back and do nothing while the man who she selects breaks his back in working and doing it all while she has a field day shopping! As the end of the show came, she exclaimed, “money can’t buy love, but it can‘t hurt!”
Need money to date?
Because girl #2 made the comment about the guy being able to afford to take her out on a date, that’s a major issue these days. It does make a man feel good to be able to pay for his date’s dinner, movie, and anything else. When he can’t, he feels terrible, poor and doesn‘t feel worthy enough to have her. But that is what the world has made the man feel for so long, that their worth is determined by what they do and what man has done for so long. So, when people go against the norm, shame is heaped up on them for breaking the pattern that has went on for years.
If a woman pays for her man’s dinner, the world would shame him and call him a “scrub”. But, are they also not friends? Don’t friends do things for one another, to bless each other? If a man treats his lady with the utmost respect, with love and care, then wouldn’t she show her appreciation in the way of blessing him?
But my question is this, why do we need money to date? There are plenty of other activities a couple can do without money. Walking by the lake, get some crayons or colored pencils and color in a coloring book (that’s pretty cool), you can read together, jog together, exercise, watch a movie, the man can write poetry to the one he loves, or they can write it to each other or they can talk in person or on the phone. If you can think of any other activity, insert it here. Having money on a date is good, but it isn’t necessary.
Is a man only chivalrous when he has money in his pocket to take her out to eat or to a movie? Apparently that is what the world has based being “romantic” as. How many ladies would like a gift that is thoughtful opposed to a man just buying a gift? Where has the creativity gone in relationships?
Imagine a knight in the days of old saving a princess locked in a tower guarded by a fire breathing dragon and as soon as the dragon is slain and the princess is saved, she says, “before you take me on your white stallion, how much money do you have on you? Can you afford me?”
Some movies that hint at what truly is important…
I’m reminded of the movie, The Wedding Singer. Robby Hart was a compassionate guy who had the occupation of a wedding singer in which he lived in his sister’s basement. I mention where he lived because that is what the world looks at. You have to have your own place so that you can show yourself to be responsible (of course it’s not wrong if you do have your own place, but many in this world want you to have bigger and better).
He even sang about his residence at a wedding reception when he was overcome with sadness over the failed relationship with his ex-fiancé’ who criticized him for it and being a wedding singer.
When Robby and Julia met and started hanging out, they fell in love with a kiss. Julia then became confused when she had her wedding dress on and wasn’t sure about marrying her fiancé, Glenn.
Julia’s mother eventually found out that she liked Robby and she said:
”You’re thinking of leaving Glenn for the wedding singer?” she said shaking her head disapprovingly. Robby’s self worth was determined by his occupation. Robby was embarrassed with his living status and occupation and (after finding out from Julia’s cousin, Holly, that “money” and “security” was important to “all” people) tried to get a bank job. Why? He wanted to impress Julia. He felt shame because of his occupation because people made him think there was something wrong with it.
What did Julia say when she heard that Robby wasn’t going to give singing lessons to his elderly friend anymore and tried justifying that he was wanting to better his situation by getting a bank job?
Julia: “I just thought teaching was a big part of your life.”
Robby: “It was, but I’m doing some things to better my situation.”
Julia: “Sounds kind of selfish.”
Robby: “It’s not selfish. There’s a lot of money out there and I want to get my hands on some.”
Julia: “But you don’t want to be just another yuppy idiot.”
Robby: “Why, what’s wrong with that? Don’t want to live in my sister’s basement anymore, want to get a big house, have some security. Can’t do that doing favors for people all the time getting paid in meatballs.”
Julia: “but you’re above all that material bull****!”
Robby: “I don’t know. We live in a material world and I’m a material-girl, or boy.”
Julia: “No you’re not..”
Robby:“What about you? You’re into material ****”
Julia: “What do you mean?”
Robby: “What do I mean? You’re marrying Glenn because he has money.”
Julia was hurt by his response because Robby apparently didn’t know her and why she was marrying Glenn, nor did she.
In society, if Julia chose Glenn, it would’ve been a smart choice because he was rich. Yet people look on the surface of a situation and not the heart of it. Her friends and family would’ve rather her be with a guy that spends long hours (making people think he’s at work) cheating on her (even though they didn’t know that) than for her to be with a guy whose job was “pathetic”, yet loved her.
Yet we know how the movie ended. Love triumphed between Julia and Robby. My guess to the rest of the lives of those characters was that money didn’t matter because love would’ve conquered any problem.
When they met their friendship mattered, money didn’t. They enjoyed each other’s company then fell in love. Julia wasn’t marrying Glenn because of money or security, but “thought” she was in love with him until she met Robby. This was proved when she spoke with her cousin Holly after Holly said that Julia was marrying him because “with Glenn, you’d have security”, Julia said, “but that’s not why I’m marrying him”, then Holly said, “then why are you?”
It reminds me of the song, “Two Princes” by the Spin doctors:
“one two princes kneel before you one, that’s what I said now, princes, princes who adore you one has diamonds in his pockets how ‘bout that now, this one, he wants to buy you rockets ain’t in his head now. This one he’s got a princely racket that’s what I said now, got some big seal upon his jacket ain’t in his head now. You marry him, your father will condone you, how ‘bout that now, you marry me your father will disown you, he’ll eat his hat now. Marry him or marry me I’m the one that loves you baby can’t you see I ain’t got no future or family tree, but I know what a prince and lover ought to be, I know what a prince and lover ought to be.”
Love is what truly mattered to one of them. They said,
“I got no future or family tree, but I know what a prince and lover ought to be”.
Someone may say,
“That’s just a movie or a song, it’s not real-life! It doesn’t matter in this world!”
Sure it matters! These examples aren’t just something fun people have come up with to act or sing to, these are examples of real-life and what people feel every day.
Have you ever watched an action movie that left you feeling inspired and wanted to take on the character traits of the hero? Or perhaps a romantic movie, you wanted then to express how much you loved your mate? The inspiration you feel from the movie is the way things ought to be. When there are confessions of love, you come alive and it makes you want to climb the highest of mountains.
Movies like that hint to the way things should be, I mean real love, not lust.
In the world it’s all about sex. You see it in movies, hear it in conversations.
Has the world lost what the real meaning of the love that is between a man and a woman? When lust brings people together, some mistaken it for love.
While I was exercising one day at the gym, I happened to see this scene (not by choice) in a soap opera of this man busting in this woman’s house that he likes, as soon as they kissed, you saw them rush to tear their clothes off, lust or love?
But movies about true love that really inspire will lift you out of your seat and make you want to change what’s inside of you. True love would make you want to be a hero, a knight in shining armor to rescue the woman you love or to find your prince charming waiting upon a white steed to sweep you up in love and take you away.
When a woman is treated cruelly by her husband, we get angry toward the husband because we know that she ought to be loved and we want to embrace her and tell her it’s ok. Or if a man knows that he truly is in love with a woman, you see him running to her in the rain bursting with his confessions of a secret love.
There are many examples in movies that hint at what is truly important in a relationship, and I believe God inspires people to create them and show the world that is what they need to follow, nothing else.
How about William Wallace in “Braveheart” who told Murron how he always loved her, because when they were children, William’s father and brother died and Murron gave him a flower and he kept until he gave it back to her to show her he thought of her everyday.
How about Jack (Nicholas Cage) from “The Family Man” who came to the airport to express the love he had for Kate (Tea Leoni) after an angel gave him a glimpse of what his life was like if he stayed with her. Jack chose a career in which he got paid big bucks, but after the glimpse, he would’ve rather been with her and his two children than to be rich. When Jack and Kate were in their van driving back from the mall Jack, was trying to get information from Kate on what happened after they married:
Jack: “So we had a baby. Big Ed had a heart attack. Bought that house, and I’ve been workin’ for him ever since. Sayonara, Wall Street. Our life in a nutshell.”
Kate: “If you want to look at it that way.”
Jack: “How would you look at it?”
Kate: “A great success story.”
Then when his glimpse was over and he returned to his life, he looked for Kate at the airport and confessed his love to her:
Jack: “We have a house in Jersey! We have two kids, Annie and Josh. Annie’s not much of a violin player, but she tries real hard. She’s a little precocious, but that’s only because she says what’s on her mind. And when she smiles--And Josh, he has your eyes. He doesn’t say much, but we know he’s smart. He’s always got his eyes open You know, he’s always watching us. Sometimes you can look at him and you just know…he’s learning something new. It’s like witnessing a miracle. The house is a mess, but it’s ours. After 122 more payments, it’s going to be ours. And you, you’re a nonprofit lawyer. That’s right. You’re completely nonprofit. But that doesn’t seem to bother you. And we’re in love. After 13 years of marriage, we’re still unbelievably in love. You won’t even let me touch you till I’ve said it. I sing to you. Not all the time, but definitely on special occasions. And we’ve--we’ve dealt with our share of surprises and made a lot of sacrifices but we stayed together. You see, you’re a better person than I am, and it made me a better person to be around you. I don’t know. Maybe it was all just a dream. Maybe I went to bed one lonely night in December, and I imagined it all, but…I swear, nothing’s ever felt more real. And if you get on that plane right now, it’ll disappear forever. I know we could both go on with our lives, and we’d both be fine, But I’ve seen…what we could be like together, And I choose us.”
How about Richard Collier in “Somewhere in Time” falling in love with a portrait of Elise McKenna, then him going back in time just to be with her? Then the scene when Elise McKenna was on stage acting, but speaking to Richard indirectly and the love she has for him:
Elise: The man of my dreams has almost faded now.
Maid: And what man is that, miss?
Elise: The one I have created in my mind. The sort of man…each woman dreams of in the deepest…and most secret reaches of her heart. I can almost see him now before me. What would I say to him…if he were really here? “Forgive me“…I’ve never known this feeling…I lived without it all my life. Is it any wonder, then, I failed to recognize you? You’ve brought it to me for the first time. Is there any way that I can tell you how my life has changed? Any way at all to let you know the sweetness you have given me? There’s so much to say, I can’t find the words…except for these:…I love you.
Or how about Noah and Allie in The Notebook when Allie said,
“Why didn’t you write me? Why? It wasn‘t over for me. I waited for you for seven years. And now it‘s too late. “
Noah: “I wrote you 365 letters. I wrote you every day for a year.”
Allie:“You wrote me?”
Noah: “It wasn’t over. It still isn’t over”,
and he went to her and they kissed.
Allie chose love over money because her and Noah’s love was real.
Or maybe in the movie, “Hitch” when Alex Hitchens jumped on the car that Sara Melas was in just to keep her from leaving and losing the best thing that ever happened to him. When her sister asked why he jumped, this is what was said:
Sara’s sister: Sara what happened?
Sara: He jumped on the car.
Sara’s sister: Why?
Hitch: Because that’s what people do. They leap and hope to God they can fly. Because otherwise…we just drop like a rock…wondering the whole way down: “Why in the hell did I jump?” But here I am, Sara, falling. And there’s only one person that makes me feel like I can fly. That’s you. “
Sara: So, you kind of like me?
Hitch: No, I love you. I love you, and I knew it from the first--(and she went to him and they kissed).
Or how about “Runaway Bride” when Maggie repeated to Ike the words he said to her at the beginning:
Maggie: I guarantee that we’ll have tough times. And I guarantee that at some point…one or both of us will want to get out. But I also guarantee….that if I don’t ask you to be mine, I’ll regret it for the rest of my life. ‘Cause I know in my heart…you’re the only one for me.
Do you know of any movies in which left you feeling inspired?
Another drama (not romantic, but hints at what really counts), The Karate Kid part II. Mr. Miyagi was on his way to Okinawa to see his sick father. While he was just about to get on the plane, Daniel came to him and said he wanted to go with him. Mr. Miyagi told him that the ticket was expensive and (after Mr. Miyagi found out Daniel got it from his savings account he said it) was for his college education and that jobs where they lived were hard to find, but Daniel said to him, “You’re more important to me than anything when I need you you‘re always there for me!” Mr. Miyagi in hearing Daniel’s heart and love for him said, “thank you”. Daniel could’ve stayed and used the money for college, but he knew he could always go, Mr. Miyagi was like a father and was important to him.
Relationships are more important than anything on earth, Jesus even said,
“love one another as I have loved you” (John 15:12).
In romance there is an attraction so deep that first brings a couple together. There is a longing to want to be with the one you love, a love so pure that draws two people together.
In marriage, how wrong for people to try and tear such a deep love apart just because one of the pair didn’t meet your expectations. Or especially when one of the couple loses sight of what originally brought them together, instead, they let concerns, worries, desires, family or friends to creep in and bring separation between that love.
So far, no more blessings have come in toward it. There is the possibility of using the tax refund to get the book out. However, is this a lack of faith? Would this be the same as Abraham having a son through Hagar? He received the promise of a son in his old age, so perhaps he thought through Hagar that is what God meant? Did He misunderstand?
Sometimes waiting is hard. Sometimes people can think that, "ok, nothing is happening, I better do something". Maybe that's what Moses thought at the sea feeling the glares of his fellow Israelites on him.
This place surely isn't easy. Yes, I know there are more immediate needs out there, more than mine that should take precedence.
I don't want to lack faith. God has come through remarkably in my past.
For so long man has been the "source" of income for his family. He has toiled so long in his job. However, when uncontrollable circumstances comes up in his life such as job loss or health issues in which he's unable to work, it could point to him that he's not the source after all. So many have turned the reigns over to God and admitted they aren't the source.
This is the purpose of this book, to show people that they aren't the source, but God is.
My promotional video will give you examples you can see and in it, will show you what the book is about. Feel free to watch it!
Here I am waiting for His provision to come to get this book out, but it has been slow....
Yet, I know in His wisdom there are reasons and here is one. I have not been satisfied with the first chapter of the book. I felt it wasn't clear, so I did some changing to it and i'm feeling more and more satisfied.
So, once His full provision comes, then i'll just send it to the publisher.
Thanks to everyone for your prayers. I'm looking forward to see what God is going to do!