Tillie's Thoughts


My name is Kristie, and whilst I am only 21 my life had been filled with a series of accomplishments. I am a former Great British International Athlete. I have represented the country on numerous occasions in the 100m, 200m and 4x100m relay. Although these are achievements to be proud of, such accomplishments only ever felt special through the continued support of my Grandad, Tony Davis.

My Grandad was my best friend, and no doubt my biggest fan. He inspired me always to be the best version of myself, and to never doubt myself. He supported me through every training session, every event, and every other second of my life. Everything he did was to ensure I was happy and living my life. He made sure I was in love with every achievement, every journey, and every second of my life.

On the 25th May this year, my 77 year old Grandad, the man who made the world’s best cuppa’s, gave the world’s best cuddles, the man who I simply adored, decided to take his life into his own hands.

The man who made sure that I loved my own life, made the decision to end his own.

I have tried to find comfort in the fact that he took control of his own life, and death. He no longer wanted to live a life of suffering, and that I understand. Yet, nothing will ever get close to addressing the heart break I feel. The feeling of ‘what if’s’, and ‘what could be,’ and I don’t think I, or anything, will ever shake away the feeling of losing him.

There are a series of taboo’s surrounding mental health. One being the existence of mental health issues within the elderly population. When trying to help the elderly, we tend to focus on physical ailments that come naturally with the aging process. We need to also focus on the battles they face against their own minds, along with so many other individuals.

In the UK, 3 million people over the age of 60 are suffering from depression, which is sadly set to increase by a third in 15 years, making this figure approximately 4.3 million. Despite such astonishing figures, over 1/3 of mental health trusts in the UK are not actively providing services and support for individuals over the age of 65. 

We need to break the taboo, and ensure that the elderly population are given the support to act on their own insecurities, and enable them to seek the support that some so desperately need.  In memory of my best friend, I wanted to be involved in a process that actively promotes a positive change and ensures no-one has to feel the pain that myself and my family have.  I have met with the amazing charity, MIND, and I have made the decision to channel my heart break into something positive.

In memory of my beloved Grandad, I have created the charity, ‘Tillie’s Thoughts.’ Where I have also recently been asked to be an ambassador at RB MIND, where I am working closely with qualified professionals to ensure that the money raised is being spent effectively and wisely. Rome wasn’t built in a day.

If we work together, so much more can be done to ensure that we are able to recognise the symptoms of mental health illnesses. I want to be part of a journey that enables people, and gives individuals and families the conditions to be able to take charge of their mental health.  I want to be able to help families who are going through what my family went through every day.

No family, or anyone, should ever have to struggle.

All of the money I raise will enable this journey.

Initially, I wish to raise as much awareness for the issue and our ambition as humanly possible. I have an amazing team around me, who support me in every possible way. In order to kick start the fundraising process, we will be hosting a series of events and activities. Coffee mornings, activity clubs, competitions, and events. All with the aim of fundraising and raising awareness. We want to do this process to ensure we are able to donate funds to the trusts and services in which we will be working alongside. The money raised will be funded into a project which actively provides counselling services and support. Also, Tillie’s Thoughts will be running coffee mornings and activity clubs all with the sole purpose of creating a sense of community which gives individuals the confidence, support and conditions to actively seek help. And to be able to make use of the services that will be available to them. Ensuring that no-one feels as though there is only one solution to their suffering.

 

I cannot explain the loss I feel by not having my Grandad by my side. I miss him more than I could have ever imagined. I miss his daily morning texts, I miss his hugs, his voice, his laugh. I miss everything about him. I have made peace with the fact that nothing I can ever do can bring him back to me. But I will do everything possible to ensure his soul lives on.

He always used to say to me, ‘fail to prepare, then prepare to fail.’ And I want to make sure that every single individual and family that is suffering is equipped with all the conditions and support that they need.


If you are able to donate, as little or as much as you can, those who struggling will feel every single benefit of your generosity.  By helping me along this journey, you are saving lives. And if Tillie’s Thoughts is able to help people, I will never be able to thank you enough. From the bottom of my heart.

 
He is always in my thoughts, and his soul is always beside me. He wakes me up in every sunrise and wishes me well in every sunset. Just the smallest donation, will change the lives of others, and mine in so many ways. As well as honouring the memory of my amazing Grandad. Thank you for taking the time to read this and for donating.

Tillie x