single mom w/autistic son need help

here is my story:

My name is Hallie. I am 32 years old. I have a gorgeous, amazing little boy named Bobby. He is 8 years old and the love of my life. He is also severely autistic. I would not change anything about my boy. My goals for him have always been not to try and make him a "normal" child, but to be as comfortable and independent as himself as possible.

I made a lot of mistakes in my 20s. Bobby's dad is an addict and currently in prison. He is not in our son's life due to his decades-long addiction. We separated 5 years ago when the marriage had become abusive. I have forgiven Bobby's dad and understand he is a sick person, not a bad man. However, the abuse left me with crippling PTSD that I have battled ever since. I myself am also an addict in recovery, and I take responsibility today for my disease. I thank God every day for my sobriety and the chance to make things right and give my precious son the life he deserves.

I am also bipolar. I have struggled with bipolar depression my entire life and it has made it impossible to work a traditonal job. I am a prideful person and do not like asking for help. It makes me feel burdensome and helpless. I have tried time and time again to work minimum wage jobs to support myself and my son, but some days it is a tremendous chore to even get in the shower. This is the reality of my mental illness, and I have accepted it.

I have been living with family all this year and am so grateful for their kindness and patience with me. However, there is no room for my little boy, so he is with my devoted mom and I get him on the weekends. My mom takes wonderful care of my son and I don't know what I'd do without her, but she also has her own struggles and taking care of a special needs child by oneself is not easy. I want the privilege of raising my son again, and having my own little place where I can provide him with a room and stability. That is all I want out of life, but right now it seems impossible. I am currently being evaluated for SSI/disability, but that takes time and I am terrified I will not qualify. I have no income and rely solely on the help of family and friends. I need so badly to be financially responsible for myself and my son. We need a place to live; I hope to use any money raised here to help us get a place of our own. Right now I have nothing. That is why I desperately need this money. I do not know what else to do other than to humble myself and ask for help.

Please help me.

If anyone is hesitant to donate due to my past addiction, know that any funds will be handled by a responsible family member. I thank you so much for taking the time to read my story. Maybe if you struggle as well, it made you not feel so alone. Maybe you have the extra funds to help. Either way, know that I am eternally and sincerely grateful.

Love & Best Wishes,

Hallie Liebling