A young person crippled by G.A.D.

I am a 24 year old man battling generalised anxiety disorder & who, thanks to the ridiculously strict, unfair & disrespectful rules of the DWP, has been left financially stranded. I have occasionally been helped out by family since the problems with the DWP started, but I cannot & do not wish to be a burden on them any longer
It started last summer when I applied for Universal Credit at a time when my grief & anxiety issues weren't anywhere near as bad as what they are now, but the next few weeks it was leading up to the 1st anniversary of my grandad's passing away (the 3rd bereavement in my family in just over 4 year after my mum's passing in June 2011 & my great grandad in May 2013) & after that things began to unravel again. I was signed off by my gp & was given a sick note, I rang the UC helpline to find out where I had to send my sicknote & the guy I spoke to told where I had to send it but also told me that I only have to send it in & that I don't have to go to the Jobcentre anymore. This later turned out to be incorrect as I was eventually sanctioned for not attending appointments in the following months, & what makes it even more unfair is that I didn't even know about the majority of these appointments as I had received no notification about them despite the DWP claiming that they had sent me letters about them. I did start going to see my work coach at the jobcentre again in December last year after ringing the DWP & establishing what had been going on, & I was given a hardship payment by them but that is all I have received from them since the Christmas period, because as it turns out they only started sanctioning me at that time (though why it took them that long I don't know) due to the fact that I hadn't attended appointments despite not knowing about them, i'd provided them with sick notes from my doctor & letters of explanation as to why I hadn't attended those appointments, but for some reason they still think it's appropriate to continue to sanction me. I even sent them a letter requesting a change of mailing address but I have not heard a peep from them since. I would call them & ask them what on earth is going on with all this or go to the jobcentre & talk to them in person but due to their ridiculously strict & unfair rules my anxiety disorder makes me unable to control my anger at times & i'm terrified that if I even try to do that then I won't be able to control myself & will do something stupid. It's got so bad at times where i've been led to self harm & on one occasion a friend of mine even called an ambulance because she was so worried about me. I try my best to get by but it's difficult without money, I do apply for jobs but i'm lucky if I even get a response back telling me my application hasn't been successfull, & i've got absolutely nowhere with the DWP.

If you're wondering what I plan to do with the donations I receive, I referred to being helped with money by family in recent times at the beginning of my story, & I hope to be able to pay my aunt back the money that she lent me in January, I also need a new phone as due to an accident that resulted in some water damage i'm currently without a working phone & with a new phone I will at least be able to remain in touch with family & friends who have been like a rock to me over the last 18 months or so & not being able to contact them sets my disorder off & makes my mind wonder things it doesn't need (others battling anxiety & other sorts of mental health issues may know how I feel there). And also, photography is quite a hobby of mine, the process of taking photos puts my mind at rest, even if it's for just a few minutes & sometimes, even for a brief period, I forget about my anxiety. Before I haven't been able to afford a proper camera, hence why i've been using the camera on my phone to take pictures (& despite it only being a phone camera i've got some really positive feedback from many of my friends about my photos so that provides a much needed boost of morale) but i've always wanted an actual digital camera to take some much better photos with, & with one I will be able to take photos that are of a good enough quality to sell, & if I sell enough photos then I won't need to rely on the DWP & Universal Credit any longer & my family won't have to worry about me anymore.

To be honest I was a bit nervous & uncertain about setting up a page on here but I just didn't know what else to do, even as I sit here typing this I feel nervous because Ii'm not exactly sure what to expect, but I just thought to myself "I won't know if I don't at least try"

I thank any donors in advance & I would like them to know that any donations, be they big or small, are very much appreciated.