Therapy For Childhood Sexual Abuse
Donation protected
For obvious reasons i'm not including my name or photo in this, and I understand if some people may be dubious about it but hopefully my explanation helps you understand. This is a sensitive subject that may trigger people, please bear with me.
Since the age of 8 up until the age of 15 I was groomed by a family member, he abused me mentally, physically, and sexually, ensuring that I was isolated and vulnerable. It was made aware to my parents, but it was kept quiet and instead the abuser was allowed to continuously be around me and in my household to the point where I was made to believe it was all my fault and that I seriously doubted my own sanity.
If it hadn't been for meeting my better half five years ago, and him being able to question my manic highs and suicidal lows, then I would have never been diagnosed and the truth about my abuse would have remained hidden. In the past three years i've been diagnosed with PTSD, BPD(borderline personality disorder), and severe anxiety coupled with depression along with reliving the trauma I have tried all my life to avoid remembering. I struggle leaving the house, looking in the mirror, I have episodes where I claw at my skin and face leaving me bloody and scarred, times where I can't even leave my bed due to hyper sensitivity to loud noises and light.
From 15 years old I worked, anything to get out the house and away from the memories, the sights, the smells, I hate that something that was done to me controls my life to the point that i'm not just trapped inside my own home but in my own head. After the abuse was brought to light I had a breakdown in my work, I was unfairly dismissed due to phoning in sick that one day because I told my boss the truth of what had happened. He said that it was not safe for the customers or fellow staff members for me to be working, because I had mental health issues he did not want me working for him. So I've put all my faith in my PTSD therapy with the hopes that it'll allow me some normality in my life, I was even managing to get the bus with the help of a close family member until recently.. This brings me to the reason for Gofundme.
Before I could get a bus there and back so long as I had somebody with me, but two months ago I found that my abuser not only drives my local bus but has been put on to the bus route that goes through our small town, the only one that is available to go to the hospital. With no other alternative i've been forced to take taxis if i've to get better, but with that it's costing me £20 a session, something I can't afford. I want to complete this therapy and get the help I need, so that I no longer feel that it's my fault and that I can go to the police and report this person so they are no longer trusted around other young and vulnerable people. I don't want this person destroying anybody else's life like he did mine, coming up on 30 I want to be able to live, to go back to work, to become the person I was always supposed to be. Your donations help me reach my therapy and put me a step closer to getting better, if I have any left aside i'll be donating it towards the local charity Break The Silence, without them I wouldn't be confident enough to face my demons and they help so many men and women who are survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
Thank you for reading this, i'm sorry if it's jumbled and i'm more than happy to give more information if needs be. I just didn't want to throw everything out here, thank you again.
Since the age of 8 up until the age of 15 I was groomed by a family member, he abused me mentally, physically, and sexually, ensuring that I was isolated and vulnerable. It was made aware to my parents, but it was kept quiet and instead the abuser was allowed to continuously be around me and in my household to the point where I was made to believe it was all my fault and that I seriously doubted my own sanity.
If it hadn't been for meeting my better half five years ago, and him being able to question my manic highs and suicidal lows, then I would have never been diagnosed and the truth about my abuse would have remained hidden. In the past three years i've been diagnosed with PTSD, BPD(borderline personality disorder), and severe anxiety coupled with depression along with reliving the trauma I have tried all my life to avoid remembering. I struggle leaving the house, looking in the mirror, I have episodes where I claw at my skin and face leaving me bloody and scarred, times where I can't even leave my bed due to hyper sensitivity to loud noises and light.
From 15 years old I worked, anything to get out the house and away from the memories, the sights, the smells, I hate that something that was done to me controls my life to the point that i'm not just trapped inside my own home but in my own head. After the abuse was brought to light I had a breakdown in my work, I was unfairly dismissed due to phoning in sick that one day because I told my boss the truth of what had happened. He said that it was not safe for the customers or fellow staff members for me to be working, because I had mental health issues he did not want me working for him. So I've put all my faith in my PTSD therapy with the hopes that it'll allow me some normality in my life, I was even managing to get the bus with the help of a close family member until recently.. This brings me to the reason for Gofundme.
Before I could get a bus there and back so long as I had somebody with me, but two months ago I found that my abuser not only drives my local bus but has been put on to the bus route that goes through our small town, the only one that is available to go to the hospital. With no other alternative i've been forced to take taxis if i've to get better, but with that it's costing me £20 a session, something I can't afford. I want to complete this therapy and get the help I need, so that I no longer feel that it's my fault and that I can go to the police and report this person so they are no longer trusted around other young and vulnerable people. I don't want this person destroying anybody else's life like he did mine, coming up on 30 I want to be able to live, to go back to work, to become the person I was always supposed to be. Your donations help me reach my therapy and put me a step closer to getting better, if I have any left aside i'll be donating it towards the local charity Break The Silence, without them I wouldn't be confident enough to face my demons and they help so many men and women who are survivors of childhood sexual abuse.
Thank you for reading this, i'm sorry if it's jumbled and i'm more than happy to give more information if needs be. I just didn't want to throw everything out here, thank you again.
Organizer
Anonymous Anonymous
Organizer
