Help 3 cats and 2 humans escape 1 narcissist

$1,524 of $5,000 goal

Raised by 23 people in 6 days
I was living in Seattle when my life went bust, so my partner, myself, and our 3 cats had to move back home with my mother. She'd promised we'd have ample space for the cats. Not true. She'd told me her dogs had never harmed a cat. Also not true.

The short version is, in addition to her threatening the cats, her dog lurks outside and makes every attempt he can to kill them. The house is filthy. The neighbors are planning an intervention because her animals are in trouble. It's a bad time.

The cats are stuck in our room because her dog likes to hunt small, furry things and running the murderous dog gauntlet is stressful and dangerous.

I have a stable job and planned to move us out in a few months once I was financially stable, but my mother has accused my partner of hiding "devices" that make her dog go crazy and threatened the cats. It's enough to write a book, so I did if you want the whole story .

For their sake as well as ours, we need out now. We want to avoid being part of a true crime podcast. If you are down with preventing true crime podcasts, but would rather buy a shirt or mug or something, we've got those, too  .


$1200: This is what I owe my old complex in Seattle before we can even start looking.

$2000: Between first month's rent, deposits, application fees, pet deposits, and so forth, this is what we need to get into a place.

$1000: This goes towards getting utilities turned on and some basic furnishings. I'll sleep on the floor for my cats if I have to, but I'm old and would rather not.

$800: This will cover taxes and fees so I don't wind up in this situation again and will also go towards unexpected moving expenses.


I still do owe $4600 on the car, which she helped finance (and I am grateful for the help). I'd love to get that paid off.

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So you know I'm not sitting on my butt while you folks generously donate, here's what I'm up to this weekend.

I'm promoting this on my social feeds, for whatever that's worth. If you can spare a Twitter or Facebook link, I'd definitely appreciate it.

I dug up my old Reddit account and have posted it in several of the subreddits there. I'm not spamming, just places where it's allowed.

I'm posting the eBook on several of the ebook promotion sites, so that's another venue we're pursuing.

And the shirts we're also using as a fundraiser came out super nice! Picture below. Grab one of those at https://ilikebigcats.threadless.com/
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So you may be wondering, what's she up to since accusing my girl of planting THE DEVICE to make her dog crazy?

(If you want the whole story, I do have the book available)

First she tried cozying up to me, but I had some Things to Say about accusing my girl of psychological warfare and threatening my cat, so we got The Silent Treatment for about a week.

I call it The Embargo. It's a combination of the initial silent treatment and a toddler's silent expressions of being angry. If you're a friend of mine and wondering why I'm so bad at expressing anger, it's why.

So it's things like scurrying out of the room as fast as she can. At one point my girl and I were making dinner in the kitchen and my mother picked a chair in the living room so she didn't have to sit by us. She's turned the TV down so we can't hear it.

She's also taken to locking the dog in her room, presumably so we can't attack him or whatever, but it's also pretty great since it keeps him from barking all day. However, I don't think locking an already-tormented dog in an even smaller room in isolation for 8-10 hours a day is going to improve things for him.

She did that for about a week, then came bursting in to see if I wanted dinner. I told her no and went back to ignoring her.

So we're on DOUBLE EMBARGO now. It's actually pretty great! She doesn't talk to us. She's been going to bed much earlier than usual. She scrambles to do her laundry so she doesn't have to be in the same room with us.

We suspect she's eating dinner out every weekend so she can not-make dinner for us even more than she's already not-making dinner for us. (Not making dinner for us is supposed to be a big deal but really isn't since we never asked her to cook for us in the first place and she's a terrible cook). I don't know if she's dragging my sister out with her or just eating Sad Old Lady meals by herself.

The other day she was so busy ignoring me when I came out that she pretended to be raptly paying attention to a golf game on TV. My mother has never played golf in her life. She doesn't watch sports, much less golf. Watching her try to pretend to be deeply engrossed in golf to spite me was hilarious.

Since she's tossing around accusations, we've also quit being involved with the dogs at all, which means when she comes home she's treated to even more pee and excrement than usual. The pee pads she tosses left and right simply can't keep up. Neither of us minded letting the dogs out, but I can't have her tossing around accusations, especially if one gets out again.

She's also taken to listening to music and crying in her room in the dark, then snapping off the music when we emerge. I don't know if she's crying because Shallow is that good of a song (it's pretty good!) or, well, the rest of her trainwreck mind.

But it is weird as hell for a grown lady to be crying in her room in the dark like an angsty teenager.

Here's a picture of Clover being adorable.
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I can't believe we did it, but we've got enough I can pay off the old apartment and at least semi-seriously start looking for a new place. Thanks so much to all of you that contributed and to everyone that shared or talked about it or passed it along.

I am going to take a distribution (since I think I can) and get that paid off. Will post what proof I can.

As thanks, here's Alex guarding his blankie.
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Friends, thank you so much. I didn't expect $800 as a total, much less on the first day. I know a lot of people are hurting and digging deep for what they're able to throw us and I appreciate that so much. We've also sold 9 copies of the book, which is 9 more than I expected to sell, and 1 t-shirt. Every little bit helps. We're only $400 short of paying off what I owe my old complex, so in less than 24 hours, we're almost at that first milestone.

Here is Clover who was angry I was taking pictures instead of petting her.
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$1,524 of $5,000 goal

Raised by 23 people in 6 days
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