Joey was adopted at birth in 2009. His birth parents were living in a car at the time with his one-year-old sister and they were both looking for work. All five of Joey’s other birth brothers were older and diagnosed with ADHD. They all struggled in school and were frequently in trouble growing up. Joey’s birth mom knew that she could not manage another baby at the time and hoped that by placing him with an adoptive family he would be able to receive the help he would need to be successful in school. Over the years Joey has shown a love for fishing, basketball, and Legos. He has received consistent professional medical, psychological, and academic support. He and his family are active parishioners at Holy Spirit in Lake Forest and Joey will be confirmed in the church when he reaches 8th grade.

Joey was diagnosed with severe ADHD after kindergarten and is now 12 years old. In 2019 Joey’s behavior changed dramatically. He began stealing food, toys, and his female family member’s undergarments. He set a small fire in the home, had trouble paying attention in school, was inappropriately surfing the school computers, and would take off on his bike without telling his mom for hours. At the time, his dad lived in another state, and he began refusing to visit him and reported hating his girlfriend. The situation escalated to the point where Joey was hospitalized and began a new medication regimen. The physicians questioned whether the stimulants he was on could be triggering some of the behavior, so he was taken off those. Since then, Joey has been seeing a psychiatrist, school social worker, two different therapists, and a tutor weekly.

In the past year, therapists have begun to question if Joey had been a victim of sexual trauma at the hands of his dad’s girlfriend. Joey still is continuing to engage in stealing undergarments and this has escalated even to school and public gym settings. He is evading all IT safety measures and putting himself at risk online. He is now failing most of his classes and lying to everyone about the smallest things. Joey needs help!

After two years of searching for the right program, I found Oxbow Academy in Utah which specializes in sex-specific treatment for boys between the ages of 11–17. The school is one of only a handful of programs specifically designed to offer treatment for behavioral problems, prior abuse, and other compulsive behavior issues. Young men have come to this program from across the country and the world. At Oxbow Academy, parents who are overwhelmed and struggling to help their teens can find support, understanding, and hope. Everyone involved in Joey’s care unanimously agree he needs to be in this program. Receiving treatment early on can help uncover the trauma he likely has endured, create a way forward for healing, give him the treatment he needs, and transform Joey’s life path. The need for specialized treatment is critical for Joey and very difficult to find at his age. Most programs that treat sexual behaviors like these start at 14 years old, which I fear will be too late to keep Joey out of serious trouble at school and perhaps with the law.

Oxbow Academy provides trained, experienced, and specialized professionals who will offer Joey the support he needs to recover but it is not covered by our health insurance. The tuition is $420 a night and will likely cost a total of over $100,000 for him to complete treatment. Any donation for Joey will be a big help in getting him the care that he needs and giving him a chance at a healthy future. The ripple effect of your donation will be life changing for Joey, his family, and his future family. We are so grateful for your support for Joey!