Tomika's Medical Fund

My loving cousin Tomika had surgery on June 26 to remove her thyroid as each side had cancerous tumors. It is believed that she's had thyroid cancer for 4 years now, as her doctor informed her that they seemed to have missed it when they biopsied her back in 2011. Since that time she has seen specialist after specialist (without answers), suffered life-altering health difficulties, and dealt with excruciating daily pain. She had to undergo a terrifying 13 hour heart surgery and is now in complete ovarian failure and full blown menopause at the mere age of 33. We are waiting on results from her pathology test to determine how advanced the cancer is. Through all of these trials she has continued to work hard, despite her illness, to make ends meet and help provide for her children, but her medical bills are piling higher and higher. Please, PLEASE support her beautiful family as they journey through this incredibly trying time. Your support means more than you could ever possibly imagine. Tomika is a kind, selfless, courageous, and remarkably loving woman. Let's bless her together. Every dollar counts, every contribution helps, thank you.

Here's the full story:

HI ALL, MY NAME IS TOMIKA AND I AM 33 YEARS OLD. ABOUT FOUR YEARS AGO I GOT THE WORST HEADACHE I HAVE EVER HAD IN MY ENTIRE LIFE, I COULDN’T EVEN LIFT MY HEAD OFF OF THE PILLOW, I WAS BALLING AND JUST REMEMBER THINKING OH NO SOMETHING IS TERRIBLY WRONG, MY HUSBAND TOOK ME TO THE DOCTOR RIGHT AWAY AND THEY DID A SCAN ON MY BRAIN WHICH CAME BACK COMPLETELY NORMAL, SO I JUST WENT HOME AND TOLD MYSELF IT MUST JUST BE A BUG , THINGS ARE BOUND TO GET BACK TO NORMAL. WELL NEEDLESS TO SAY THINGS DIDN’T GET BETTER THEY GOT WORSE, I STARTED WAKING UP WITH THAT TERRIBLE HEADACHE EVERYDAY AND WAS FEELING ABSOLUTELY EXHAUSTED AND HAD NO CLUE WHY, MY LYMPH NODES KEPT SWELLING UP IN MY NECK , THE DOCTORS WERE UNSURE OF WHAT WAS CAUSING THE SWELLING SO THEY WOULD PUT ME ON STEROIDS TO MAKE THE LYMPH NODES GO DOWN, AND DIAGNOSED ME WITH CHRONIC FATIGUE SYNDROME.

I JUST REMEMBER THINKING I AM SO EXHAUSTED AND THEESE HEADACHES AREN'T NORMAL BUT THE DOCTORS KEPT TELLING ME EVERYTHING WAS FINE, IT MUST BE STRESS AND THAT I NEEDED MORE SLEEP. I AM A HAPPILY MARRIED WOMAN WITH A HUSBAND WHO HAS A HEART OF GOLD, 3 BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN, AND I HAD A SUCCESSFUL CAREER, I KNEW IN MY HEART THAT ALL OF THEESE SYMPTOMS WERE NOT BEING CAUSED FROM STRESS. AGAIN ANOTHER TERRIBLE HEADACHE AND MY HUSBAND BROUGHT ME TO THE DOCTOR, THIS TIME THEY DID A SCAN OF MY BRAIN AND NECK WHICH SHOWED AN ENLARGED LYMPH NODE, APPARENTLY ONCE THEY REACH A CERTAIN SIZE IT IS THEN A CAUSE FOR CONCERN, WHICH THIS ONE HAD, IT WAS 3 CM BIG.

THEY SCHEDULED A BIOPSY, I WAS TERRIFIED BECAUSE THEY WERE GOING TO CUT MY NECK OPEN AND REMOVE THE NODE, THEY THOUGHT IT MAY BE A SLOW GROWING LYMPHOMA. JUST THE WORD CANCER ALONE SCARED ME TO DEATH BUT I REMEMEBER THINKING PLEASE GOD JUST LET THEM FIND IT, PLEASE LET THEM FIGURE OUT WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME. I COULDN’T IMAGINE LIVING LIKE THIS FOREVER. I HAD LEARNED TO DEAL WITH THE CHRONIC PAIN BUT IN THE MEANTIME BECAME VERY SECLUDED, PEOPLE WOULD ASK ME WHAT THE DOCTORS FOUND OUT AND I NEVER HAD ANY ANSWERS, IT JUST GOT TO THE POINT WHERE I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY. I HAVE NEVER BEEN A COMPLAINER SO MORE OFTEN THEN NOT NO ONE EVEN KNEW I WAS SICK, I PUSHED MYSELF TO GO TO WORK EVERYDAY EVEN IF THAT MEANT THAT I WAS GOING TO HAVE TO TAKE 16 IBUPROFEN TO GET THROUGH THE DAY. ( THAT IS MY TYPICAL DOSE).

I BECAME OVERWHELMED WITH GUILT BECAUSE I FELT SORRY FOR MY BEAUTIFUL BABIES, I USE TO PLAY WITH THEM OUTSIDE AND DO SO MUCH MORE BUT NOW THINGS HAVE CHANGED, I WAS DOING ALL I COULD DO JUST TO WORK AND GET SUPPER ON THE TABLE. I REMEMBER TELLING MYSELF THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO WAY YOU CAN GIVE UP TOMIKA, YOUR FAMILY IS TOO IMPORTANT AND THEY NEED YOU. I DON’T CARE HOW MANY SURGERIES OR NEEDLES IT TAKES YOU ARE GOING TO GET BETTER FOR YOUR KIDS THEY NEED YOU. SO THAT IS WHAT I DID. I MET WITH DR. STAPLETON A GENERAL SURGEON TO DISCUSS THE LYMPH NODE DISSECTION, I WAS SCARED BUT READY TO FACE WHAT EVER WAS AHEAD OF ME, AT THIS POINT I DIDN’T REALLY HAVE A CHOICE. THE BIOPSY CAME BACK BENIGN. I WAS SO RELIEVED THAT IT WASN’T CANCER BUT AT THE SAME TIME I REMEMBER WONDERING WELL THEN WHAT IS IT? MY SURGEON TOLD ME THAT IT DIDN’T LOOK RIGHT AND MADE ME PROMISE I WOULDN’T GIVE UP. I PROMISED.

AFTER THAT I DECIDED I SHOULD GO TO MAYO CLINIC, IT IS A WORLD RENOWNED HOSPITAL SO I FIGURED THEY WOULD SURELY BE ABLE TO FIGURE IT OUT. I MUST HAVE SEEN ABOUT 10 SPECIALISTS. AFTER EACH AND EVERY APPOINTMENT THE DOCTORS WOULD SAY WELL I THINK EVERYTHING IS GOOD. I THINK MOST PEOPLE WOULD HAVE BEEN RELIEVED BUT I WAS MAD, SAD, CONFUSED, AND JUST DIDN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT WAS WRONG AND COULDN’T UNDERSTAND WHY THEY COULDN’T FIND IT. I KNEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG. I REMEMBER MY FINAL SPECIALIST TO SEE WAS AN ENDOCRONOLOGIST. I WENT TO THE APPOINTMENT AND THEY DID ANDULTRASOUND OF MY NECK TO LOOK AT THE LYMPH NODES AGAIN AND AT MY THYROID. WHEN THE ULTRASOUND TECH WAS DONE A RADIOLOGIST CAME IN TO TALK TO ME AND SAID THERE IS A TUMOR ON THE RIGHT SIDE OF YOUR THYROID THAT IS CONCERNING. WE WOULD LIKE TO DO A BIOPSY AND MAKE SURE IT ISN'T CANCER OR SOMETHING WRONG WITH THE THYROID.

I REMEMBER CALLING MY GRANDMA AND TELLING HER THEY FOUND IT, THEY FINALLY FIGURED IT OUT, I WAS SO EXCITED THINKING THAT NOW MAYBE I WOULD GET BETTER., BUT AGAIN SCARED TO DEATH BECAUSE IF IT DID COME BACK ABNORMAL IT COULD MEAN CANCER. WHATEVER IT WAS I WAS READY TO FACE IT. THE FNA RESULTS CAME BACK BENIGN AND THEY SAID THAT I JUST NEEDED TO DO FOLLOW UP ULTRASOUND YEARLY. I WAS RELIEVED BUT AT THE SAME TIME DISAPPOINTED BECAUSE AGAIN NO ANSWERS AND FEELING SICK. I REMEMBER JUST THINKING WELL I GUESS NOTHING IS WRONG, THEY MUST BE RIGHT, ITS CHRONIC FATIGUE AND STRESS. I QUIT DOCTORING FOR A WHILE ABOUT A YEAR OR SO UNLESS THE NODES WOULD SWELL UP AND I WOULD JUST TAKE ANOTHER DOSE OF STEROIDS, WHICH USUALLY WORKED SHORT TERM, BUT THEN I STARTED GETTING THEESE PALPITATIONS.

IT WAS ABOUT 7 AM IN THE MORNING AND BILL HAD ALREADY GONE TO WORK, I WOKE UP WITH MY HEART POUNDING EXTREMELY FAST AND CHEST PAIN, I LOADED THE KIDS UP IN THE CAR AND DROVE MYSELF TO THE NEAREST HOSPITAL, I CALLED MY MOM AND TOLD HER TO MEET US THERE, I THOUGHT I WAS HAVING A HEART ATTACK. WHEN I GOT TO THE HOSPITAL THEY DID AN EKG AND TOLD ME EVERYTHING LOOKED NORMAL AND SENT ME HOME WITH ANXCIETY MEDICATION. ABOUT A MONTH LATER I WAS CLEANING MY CLOSET AND IT STARTED AGAIN I TURNED BRIGHT WHITE STARTING DRIPPING WITH SWEAT AND HAD PAIN IN MY CHEST AND DOWN MY ARM, I WENT UPSTAIRS AND TOLD MY HUSBAND, I DID ALL THE BREATHING TECHNIQUES UNTIL ABOUT 2 HOURS LATER AND STILL COULDN’T GET THEM TO STOP, I DIDN’T WANT TO GO TO THE DOCTOR BECAUSE LAST TIME THEY SAID MY HEART WAS FINE AND WE COULDN’T AFFORD ANOTHET DOCTORS BILL BUT MY MOM AND HUSBAND INSISTED I GO IN.

WHEN I GOT THERE THEY IMMEDIATELY BROUGHT ME BACK, MY HEART RATE WAS AT 285, THEY PUT ME ON OXYGEN AND SHOT ME UP WITH SOMETHING TO SLOW THE HEART. I WAS DIAGNOSED WITH SVT, THEY TOLD ME SOMETHING WENT HAYWIRE WITH THE ELECTRICAL PART OF MY HEART AND THEY NEEDED TO DO AN ABLATION. I AGAIN WAS SCARED BUT THOUGHT WELL I NEED TO DO WHATEVER IT TAKES TO GET BETTER.THE SURGERY TOOK 13 HOURS BUT WENT WELL. I STAYED IN THE HOSPITAL FOR ABOUT 3 DAYS AFTER HEART SURGERY AND WAS BACK TO WORK WITHIN 5 DAYS TOTAL, I NOW HAD A HEART SURGERY I HAD TO PAY FOR, LUCKILY I HAD HEALTH INSURANCE BUT I HAD A 10000.00 DEDUCTIBLE AND THE MEDICAL BILLS JUST KEPT COMING.

IT WAS ABOUT 6 MONTHS LATER I LEARNED THAT THE COMPANY I WORKED FOR WAS GOING TO SELL. I WENT INTO PANIC MODE BECAUSE MY HUSBAND WORKED THERE AS WELL AND I NEEDED TO WORK AND I NEEDED MY HEALTH INSURANCE, ESPECIALLY WITH EVERYTHING GOING ON, I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT WE WERE GOING TO DO, I WAS DEVASTATED. WITHIN ABOUT 5 TO 6 MONTHS OF MY HEART SURGERY I WENT INTO OVARIAN FAILURE AND FULL BLOWN MENOPAUSE, I WAS HAVING HOT FLASHES AND GAINING WEIGHT BUT I JUST PUT IF OFF AS ANOTHER SYMPTOM OF BEING SICK, BY THIS TIME I HAD JUST GOTTEN USED TO NOT FEELING GOOD, SOME DAYS WERE BETTER THEN OTHERS BUT I JUST KEPT PUSHING THROUGH. I HAD MY REGULAR DOCTORS APPOINTMENT AND SHE SAID MAYBE IT'S YOUR THYROID CAUSING ALL OF THIS, WE SHOULD DO AN ULTRASOUND AND LOOK AT YOUR NODULES AND MAKE SURE THEY DIDN’T GROW, I AGREED AND SCHEDULED THE ULTRASOUND.

THE TECH ISNT SUPPOSE TO TELL YOU WHAT THEY SEE BUT SHE STARTED TALKING TO ME ABOUT THYROID CANCER AND SAID THAT I REALLY NEED TO GET THE RIGHT NODULE LOOKED AT, THAT IT DIDN’T LOOK GOOD. THAT WAS THE SAME NODULE THAT MAYO HAD DONE A BIOPSY ON ALMOST 4 YEARS AGO AND IT HADNT GROWN MUCH SO I DIDN’T THINK TO MUCH ABOUT IT, BUT MY DOC THOUGHT OTHERWISE AND I WAS SCHEDULED TO HAVE ANOTHER BIOPSY. BUT WHEN I GOT THERE TO HAVE IT DONE THEY TOLD ME THEY WEREN'T COMFORTABLE BIOPSING A TUMOR OF THAT SIZE, THEY WOULD ONLY DO IT ONCE IT REACHED 1 CM OR LARGER, I LEFT IN TEARS AGAIN BECAUSE I WAS SO CONFUSED, MY REGULAR DOCTOR SEEMED CONCERNED AND THEY STILL WOULDN’T DO THE BIOPSY.

I WAS LITERALLY AT BREAKING POINT AND JUST WANTED TO GIVE UP, I CALLED MAYO CLINIC IN ROCHESTER AND SCHEDULED AN APPOINTMENT. THE APPOINTMENTS WERE ABOUT A MONTH OUT. I MET WITH THE DOCTOR AND THEY DID THE ULTRASOUND, THEY AGREED THAT I NEEDED A REPEAT FNA, SO I WENT AHEAD AND LET THEM DO IT. THIS WAS ON FRIDAY. I HAD AN APPOINTMENT SCHEDULED FOR 4:30 THE SAME DAY FOR THE RESULTS BUT THEY WEREN'T IN YET, THE DOCTOR WAS SURPRISED BECAUSE USUALLY THE PRELIMINARY REPORTS ARE AT LEAST IN, HE SAID HE WOULD HAVE TO CALL ME WITH THE RESULTS ON MONDAY. MONDAY MORNING AT ABOUT 6:15 AM THE DOCTOR CALLED, I HAD AN INTERVIEW SCHEDULED FOR THE SAME MORNING AT 9:30, I WAS STILL SLEEPING SO DIDN’T THINK MUCH OF THE CALL BUT IT WOKE ME UP, IT WAS STORMING OUTSIDE SO I WAS SLEEPING BUT ONLY LIGHTLY. I SAW THAT IT WAS ROCHESTER ON MY CALLER ID, I DEBATED ON ANSWERING, IF IT WAS BAD NEWS I WASN’T SURE HOW I WOULD TAKE IT BUT IF THEY STILL DIDN’T KNOW THAT MEANT I WAS STILL GOING TO BE SICK .

I REFUSED TO GIVE UP. MANY OF TIMES I TOLD MY HUSBAND I CAN'T KEEP DOING THIS, AND HE JUST MADE ME PROMISE TO KEEP TRYING, HE SAID HONEY YOU AREN'T YOUR SELF YOU CAN'T GIVE UP. BILL WAS STILL SLEEPING, I BROUGHT MY PHONE DOWNSTAIRS SO I WOULDN’T WAKE HIM WHILE LISTENING TO THE VOICEMAIL, I THOUGHT IT WAS PROBOBALY GOOD NEWS AND DR GHARIB JUST DIDN’T WANT ME TO WORRY THE WHOLE DAY WAITING FOR THE BIOPSY RESULTS, HE SAID HE WAS 99 PERCENT SURE THAT IT WASN’T CANCER SO MORE THEN LIKELY IT WAS GOING TO BE GOOD NEWS. I COULD HEAR THE EMPATHY IN HIS VOICE, HE SAID THEY MISSED IT 4 YEARS AGO, THE TUMOR HADN'T GROWN ENOUGH FOR THE CANCER TO HAVE JUST STARTED. HE NEEDED TO SEE ME TOMORROW TO GET TREATMENT ON THE WAY.

THE TEARS FELL LIKE A RIVER, I THOUGHT I WOULD BE SO MUCH MORE RELIEVED BUT I WAS SCARED, HOW COULD I TELL MY BEAUTIFUL AMAZING CHILDREN THAT THEIR MOM HAS CANCER? HOW COULD I TELL MY HUSBAND? HOW AM I SUPPOSE TO GO TO A JOB INTERVIEW? HOW AM I GOING TO TELL MY MOM AND MY BROTHER AND MY REALATIVES? WHY? WHY RIGHT NOW WHEN I CAN'T EVEN AFFORD TO PUT FOOD ON MY TABLE? I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO SAY WHEN BILL CAME DOWN THE STAIRS AND I WAS CRYING IN DISBELIEF WITH THE PHONE IN MY HAND, I WAS IN SHOCK. COMPLETE AND UTTER SHOCK. I KNEW THAT HE WAS ALREADY EXTREMELY STRESSED DUE TO OUR CURRENT FINANCIAL SITUATION AND I COULDN’T EVEN IMAGINE GIVING HIM THE NEWS.

HE CRIED TOO, WE CRIED TOGETHER AND THEN TALKED ABOUT HOW WE WERE GOING TO TELL OUR KIDS. JAYDON IS THE OLDEST OF THE THREE HE. JUST TURNED 15 AND PASSED HIS PERMIT TEST, HE LOVES BASKETBALL AND COMPUTER GAMES AND ALWAYS IS LOOKING OUT FOR HIS LITTLE SISTERS, ABBY IS THE MIDDLE ONE AND IS 11, SHE LOVES TO SING AND DANCE. SHE GOT THAT FROM ME, SHE REMINDS ME A LOT OF WHAT I WAS LIKE WHEN I WAS LITTLE, AND LITTLE SKYLER IS THE YOUNGEST, SHE IS 9 AND WILL BE 10 IN SEPTEMBER, SHE IS THE MORE QUIET ONE WHO LOVES TO DO PUZZLES AND IS ALWAYS TAKING CARE OF EVERYONE. SHE LOVES FASHION AND SINGING AND DANCING TOO.

THEY ARE ALL SO DEAR TO MY HEART AND I COULDN’T IMAGINE TELLING THEM, I WANTED TO BE REALLY CAREFUL IN THE WAY WE WERE GOING TO GO ABOUT IT, AS WE KNEW IT WAS GOING TO BE HARD ON THEM. I WAS SO PROUD OF HOW WELL THE KIDS TOOK THE NEWS, THEY JUST WANTED MOMMY TO GET BETTER AND TOLD ME YOU ARE TOUGH AS NAILS MOMMA AND WE KNOW YOUR GOING TO BE OK THROUGH THE TEARS. MY MOM AND I HEADED OUT TO ROCHESTER TO FIND OUT THE DETAILS ON THE TREATMENT AND I WAS STILL IN SHOCK, I COULDN’T EVEN BELIEVE WHAT WAS HAPPENING, AND IT WAS HAPPENING SO FAST, AFTER ALL I HAD BEEN WAITING FOR ANSWERS AND NOW I HAD THEM. I THOUGHT IT WOULD BE EASIER THEN THIS, BUT THIS WASN’T EASY, THIS WAS HARD. BUT I TOLD MYSELF AGAIN YOU CAN'T GIVE UP, YOU NEED TO STAY STRONG, YOUR FAMILY NEEDS YOU. NOW IS THE TIME TO BE STRONG.

I WAS IN THE WAITING ROOM MY HEAD LEANED BACK WAITING FOR MY APPOINTMENT TO GO OVER THE TREATMENT PLAN WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN A LADY WALKED PAST ME AND RUBBED MY BACK, SHE SAID GOD BLESS YOU AND YOU'RE GOING TO BE OK, I FELT THIS WEIRD RUSH COME OVER MY BODY AND I STARTED CRYING AND TOLD HER THANK YOU, SHE THEN WALKED AWAY, I HAPPEN TO THINK IT WAS AN ANGEL SENT TO ME, AFTER ALL HOW WOULD SHE KNOW? THE DOC SCHEDULED SURGERY FOR FRIDAY, ONLY TWO DAYS AWAY, THEY ARE GOING TO REMOVE THE WHOLE THYROID DUE TO THE TUMORS ON BOTH SIDES AND REMOVEE THE LYMPH NODES TO CHECK FOR SPREAD. 4 DOCTORS CAME IN THE ROOM TO DISCUSS THE PROCEDURE, I WAS DEFINITELY NERVOUS ABOUT THE SURGERY BECAUSE THERE WAS A CHANCE MY VOCAL CHORDS WOULD BE DAMAGED AND I HAVE NEVER HAD A BREATHING TUBE IN BEFORE. EVERYONE WHO KNOWS ME KNOWS THAT I LOVE TO SING AND I COULDN’T IMAGINE NOT BEING ABLE TO DO SO.

THE PATHOLOGY REPORTS WOULD DETERMINE ANY FURTHER TREATMENT NECESSARY AND I WILL NEED TO DO RETURN VISITS TO MAKE SURE THAT THE CANCER DOESN’T COME BACK. I AM CURRENTLY 3 DAYS OUT OFF SURGERY AND DOING WELL BUT SORE, I AM STILL WAITING ON THE REPORTS TO COME BACK FROM THE LYMPH NODES. I AM STILL DOCTORING TO DISCUSS AND FIGURE OUT TREATMENT FOR THE OVARIAN FAILURE, BUT I AM GETTING CLOSER EACH DAY. I HAVE BEEN OVERWHELMED BY THE LOVE AND SUPPORT MY FAMILY AND FRIENDS HAVE SHOWN ME DURING THIS TIME AND COULDN’T IMAGINE DOING THIS WITHOUT ANY OF THEM. I AM SO GRATEFUL TO HAVE SUCH AMAZING PEOPLE IN MY LIFE AND HAVE SO MUCH TO BE THANKFUL FOR AND I PLAN ON CONTINUING TO KICK CANCERS BUTT AND TO DO WHAT EVER IT TAKES TO GET THROUGH THIS.

I AM GOING TO BE THE MOTHER MY KIDS DESERVE, THE WIFE MY HUSBAND MARRIED, THE DAUGHTER MY MOM LOVES, THE BEST SISTER IN THE WORLD, A HELPING HAND AND A GREAT FRIEND, AND HOPEFULLY AN INSPIRATIONAL STORY. I AM NOT TOO PROUD TO ADMIT THAT LIFE IS REALLY SCREWED UP RIGHT NOW AND THAT IF MY FAMILY AND I MAKE IT THROUGH, IT IS A PURE MIRACLE AND BY THE GRACE OF GOD. IF WE DON’T MAKE IT, IT WASN’T BECAUSE WE DIDN’T WORK HARD OR BECAUSE WE WERE LAZY OR BECAUSE WE GAVE UP, IT IS BECAUSE FOR SOME REASON THERE IS A LESSON TO BE LEARNED, BUT I HAVE FAITH. IN THE END