Life in the cookie jar: Fighting to save my life.

For as long as I've known myself, I've had asthma. Topping off my really bad asthma I also came with the added baggage of snoring. And as a child I knew other children,  mainly boys that snored but their everyday sleep snoring was unlike mine as I've been told I sound like a truck breaking the corner or spurr tree hill and for those familiar with that corner and what the trucks sound like, they will understand. Well that was then at least. As I grew older, sleep overs were a problem as my friends were either worried I was dying or not sleep because I kept them up and in my adult life, every single partner I've had,  has at some point brought up the "snoring" issue and one ex actually told me I wasn't normal and I was broken. Eventually I found out that with my swollen adenoids and my asthma was a walk in the park compared to the  condition that I had causing me to literally stop breathing in my sleep and most times either jump up or slap myself back to a continuous state. I was told I had something called is Sleep Apnea. And in true and classic Jenée style, I was told I have a severe  and obstructive case based on how long I stop breathing at night and for how long. Fast forward to today, I'm writing this from the hospital, strung up on IV's and a nasal cannula feeding me oxygen.  I came to the hospital originally for something unrelated to my sleep Apnea. I recently found out that I also have endometriosis and fibroids and that they are the cause for the severe abdominal cramps on crack I've been feeling for more than a month. The resident doing rounds today minced no words or spared no feelings in telling me my heart was on the verge of failing. Me, 31, no kids, nothing to show for life but the fact that I've been living it , today I found out that because of losing oxygen continuously each night, being severely hypoxic is what she said, my weight and several other things have caused my heart to stop working the way it needs to. I laid in the bed stared at the ceiling and I bawled. The thought of possibly falling asleep and never walking up hit me hard, the cost of all these sessions she told me I'd have to go through. I got a glimpse of everything really quick. I have several consults and sessions to do, machinery to purchase so I can sleep and take strain off my heart, these sessions I need to do are expensive. May include travel to properly get the best assessment, the machine I need is called a CPAP and that stands for continuous positive air pressure,  it has several parts and has to be filled with special liquid, the face gear will go over my nose and mouth and push oxygen in while I sleep, so even if I do stop breathing, oxygen will be present. I'm unfortunately not in a position to financially incurr these costs. Given the severity and increase in urgency, I'm turning to this platform for help, it's never easy opening this door, it let's everyone in and things become more real than they were before.  Before you decide to give, I want to say thank you. It takes real kindness to help someone you don't know, but I am grateful for the assistance.