There is a lot that I keep from people because of the stigma and socially taboo nature of personal and family life. It might not be readily observable to most, but I have been struggling with mental illness my entire life. In my senior year of high school, I was diagnosed with depression, which I was well aware of for most of my life, although it was simply dismissed as being negative or a downer. Last year I placed myself into a program and my depression diagnosis was confirmed, but I was also diagnosed with anxiety, bipolar disorder, and obsessive compulsive disorder, which I have been struggling with since my childhood. I have been experienced intensive emotional trauma throughout my life, which led to a conclusion of post traumatic stress disorder being present.

For some reason, I have found myself in the most difficult years of my life so far. I haven't been able to attend college due to financial hardships, and I have been struggling to function in the workplace. On February 11th of this year, I initiated a personal leave from my full time job in hopes of gathering myself mentally and emotionally. I filed a claim for temporary disability insurance with the state and expected to be compensated for lost time while I found professional help. I enrolled myself, for the second time, in an intensive outpatient program that focuses on stability and routine in addition to therapy and medicine in order to balance patients' mental states. This program had initially diagnosed me with my mental illnesses last year, so I hoped that it would be able to help me get a handle on things again. I took a leave of absence from work in order to have a full focus on the program and bettering myself, as last year I was working two jobs while attending, making it difficult to take it all on at once.
While the program has helped me balance medication and put a lot into perspective, I have still not received a decision on my temporary disability claim . It has been over a month and I am in jeopardy of losing my home and my car because of the delay, but due to the requirements of disability leave, I can't work during this time off or I won't receive any pay.
I have put off my car and insurance payments as long as I can, but they are all coming up in the next week, and I have no income to pay them. At the beginning of April, I have rent due, and then a week in, I will have to pay my car payments again. I haven't had money to buy myself food or even gas to get to the program.
I hate having to ask anyone for help, but I am at a point where I risk losing everything for trying to get better.
I am asking for the goal in order to pay my bills, but also pay back those who have lent me money in the past month to keep me fed and in my home.
Please, I know this is a lot to take in, but I need to get better so I can get back on my feet and work again.