Help me get out of debt

Hi, I'm truly sorry to be making this post. I am 28, trying to get out of debt and struggling with overcoming trauma from illness and domestic abuse.

My goal is to raise £4500, half of the dept just to help me get back on my feat.

On Christmas day 2019, my family finally kicked out my abusive father. This was after a horrid childhood of him abusing my mother, my siblings and me. My childhood was made more difficult with the fact that I fell ill with gastroenteritis issues that left me bed ridden from the age of 14 to 19 and still gives me problems today. Before this from the age of 11 to 13, I acted as a carer for my mother after my father thew her to to the floor and repeatedly kicked her back, leaving her with 2 slipped disks. She was bedridden and reliant on a doctor who did nothing but increase her morphine dosage until she was about to OD. These are not the main points of my childhood just the stuff I have been trying to work through whilst waiting on therapy from the NHS.

On Christmas day 2019 we finally kicked my father out of the house and my mother started the long process of a divorce, wanting just to get it over with she opted for a 50/50 split.

Like seemed to be getting better after this but my issues with debt began. I took over the main financial duties due to my sister being made redundant due to COVID. I worked part time in the NHS whilst trying to study and this was working for a whilst. I attended collage to get the high school qualifications need to start a course in architecture, something I had wanted to do since I was 7 but was derailed due to my family life and illness. During this time my debt wasn't substantial but worsened as I moved from college to university.

I was accepted onto my course and the first year went smoothly, I was not at the top of the class but managed to achieve decent grades to move on to second year and was able at 26, to move out on my own. During this time my sister, now married with a child, was struggling . I tried to help in what way I could as her husband was made redundant twice. This led me to help with my student loan whilst I tried to manage from my part-time wage but needed to use my credit card to do anything. My course did not provide materials and model making was an integral part of passing. This led me into further debt. The stress of all this and being in a safe space for the first time did more damage to me than living with my abuser. I started to have audio flashbacks of my childhood. Replaying several scenes as if I was actually back there hearing everything over and over again. My GP recommended taking time off to recover but this only put me on more dept. As the flashbacks got worse so did my health and my studies. Eventually I agreed to take a break in studies but this led me to withdrawing from my course altogether.

I found a full time job at the university and was receiving therapy from them for 6 sessions. I was slowly managing to pay off the credit card and starting to recover, until I received a call from my mother. She has been struggling with her mental health and my brother tried to commit suicide. At this news I began the process of moving in with my family. My mother moved back to her home town as when she married she moved to my fathers city (Indian customs). I moved with her and again I am responsible for the majority of the financial and emotional support. My brother is autistic and we are in the process of having his support transferred over to the care providers of this new town. My mother is mentally checked out, understandable considering the years of abuse she insured. I try not to envy them for the fact that they can't work, for the fact that they are getting some lovely of help, but now my health is again failing and I am in crippling dept in a dead end job unable to progress. I am not paid well considering the cost of living and getting overwhelmed.

I hate myself for having to ask this. I hate myself for getting into this situation in the first place. I have been to dept relief agencies and tried a balance transfer for my credit card, but this will only give me another credit card to pay off and a debt relief order makes me unable to work for 2 years. I am now needing to ask strangers online for help. I know no one is in a good financial position these days and I don't have family to ask help off. Please whatever you can help with would be greatly appreciated. I am in £10,000 dept and ask for £4500 as the fact that I'm asking makes me feel sick to my stomach and can't bring myself to ask for help for the full amount.