Help Brandon Get Back on His Feet

Hey everyone, my name is Brandon. Some of you know me as Handsome on Instagram, Brandon Barz, or maybe even StoneCold Stunner.

I’m a Scorpio, and this is incredibly hard for me to say because I don’t like asking for help. But I’m swallowing my pride because I need it. I’ve been fighting for the past two, almost three years to survive after being separated from my mom, the person I dedicated my whole life to. From the age of 13 to 28, I took care of her. That was my mission, my only purpose—to make sure my mom was okay. I didn’t care if I was struggling; as long as she was alive and breathing, that’s all that mattered.

But life has been so unbelievably hard. My mom had me at 42, and from day one, we’ve been through more than most people could imagine. The countless hospital visits, the times she went missing and I had to see her name on the news, the fires I had to drag her out of, and so much more. I’ve been through hell to keep her safe, and no one was there to help me. I didn’t know how to take care of myself. No one told me how to manage my finances or that I should’ve stayed in school. I had to drop out to care for her, and I never looked back. I gave up my childhood, my future, everything for her.

We didn’t even have our own place until I was 12. Before that, we moved around constantly. Finally, when we did get a place, her health started to deteriorate, and that’s when everything fell apart. I had to put everything aside to be there for her, but over time, no one in my family stepped up to help. Then, when I was left with nothing, no one to turn to, I had just three weeks to come up with $2,600 to move into a new apartment or motel. I thought my family would help me move—maybe offer a little support—but they didn’t. I had to do everything alone. I had to leave behind so many things I couldn’t take with me, and I documented my whole struggle on YouTube.

But things didn’t get better. The place I was living flooded five times, destroying my belongings, and even though I had renter’s insurance, I lost my job because my boss didn’t believe the flooding was happening as often as I said. Every time I tried to get back on my feet, something else knocked me down. I couldn’t afford to pay both my car note and my rent, so my truck got repossessed. I felt like a failure, so I lied and told people it was stolen. I started using another car I had that was broken down, but even that car has caused me problems.

I eventually found another job, and I worked hard, so hard, but after eight months, the company shut down without warning. They didn’t even have the decency to tell me ahead of time, even though I worked through holidays, putting in extra effort. And that was the last straw. I had to file for unemployment, but it’s been a constant struggle.

I’ve been on my own through all of this. I moved to this city for a partner, but that relationship ended, and now I have no one. I don’t have a dad. My father’s never been in my life. I don’t have siblings, and my family? Well, they’ve been absent. They’ve been punishing me for something I didn’t even do, and it’s left me feeling completely alone.

I’ve been donating blood to try and make ends meet. I’ve told my friends I’ve been doing it, but the reality is, no one has helped financially except for a few incredible people on TikTok. Y’all have been my real support. And it’s humbling, truly. But it’s hard for me to even ask for help like this.

I’ve been through so much, and I don’t even think most people realize the toll it’s taken on me. I suffer from PTSD and anxiety—because of the fires, the constant fear for my mom’s life, and the trauma I’ve experienced. Every fire alarm sends my heart into a panic. Every time I hear one, I remember the times I woke up to flames. It’s something I live with every day.

I’m not telling you this so you’ll feel sorry for me. I’m sharing this because I want you to understand how much I’ve been through, and why I’m here, asking for help.

On October 1, 2024, an ex of mine tried to run me over. I had poured lemonade on him after he came to my place despite me telling him not to. He couldn’t get to me, but he wrecked my car in the process. Now the left side of my car is completely destroyed. My window doesn’t roll down. The doors won’t open. The car makes this horrible sound like it’s dragging cans, and it’s leaking oil. It’s getting hotter and hotter, and the AC doesn’t work. My right headlight is broken, and my left blinker is out. Every time I climb into that car, it feels like I’m going through an obstacle course. I have to squeeze through the car like a jungle gym, and every time I drive it, it’s like I'm pushing it to its limit.

I’m a proud person. I’ve never asked for anything. I’ve always managed to figure things out on my own, but I can’t anymore. I need a car that works. I need to be able to get to work and take care of my clients. I’ve been working as a registered at-home health aide, a med tech, and a behavioral analyst. I work with both kids and adults with disabilities, but I can’t do this job without a functional car.

I have a job lined up that starts on March 18th, and I have two clients, including a 12-year-old boy who requires me to drive him to appointments. I need to be able to get to them, to help them. But I’m stuck without a car.

I don’t have anyone in my corner. My family is absent, and I’m doing this alone. I’m so tired of being alone in this fight. If you can help, even with a dollar, or if you know someone who’s willing to donate or sell a car to me on payment terms, I would be forever grateful. I can’t afford to lose this job. It’s my lifeline.

To give you some more context—my mom had me when she was 42. By the time I was born, my sister was already raising her own child and living independently. My older brother was in prison for life when I was born, and though he’s out now, he hasn’t taken any responsibility for the things I’ve been carrying. As the youngest, I’ve been the one handling everything—managing my mom, finances, everything.

I’ve seen my mom go through addiction, mental health struggles, seizures, aneurysms, and more. I’ve been her caretaker through all of it, and I’ve never complained. But now, when I need help, it feels like no one is there. My sister didn’t even tell me when my mom was hospitalized last month—I had to find out by calling around to hospitals and showing up. No one reached out to me.

I’ve been through so much, and all I want is to be able to visit my mom while taking care of myself. I don’t want to lose everything I’ve worked so hard for.

Below are some pictures of the things I’ve been through over the last 2-3 years. These images show the damage, the struggles, and the reality of what I’ve faced. It’s hard to show this side of things, but I want you to understand just how deep the pain goes and why I’m asking for help.

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for reading this. Anything helps—anything at all.