We are grateful for your support

This story isn't an easy one to write, let alone ask for help. If you know our parents, they are never ones to ask for help, so we are asking for them.

Mom retired mid April 2023. Dad decided that they should do what they enjoy doing to celebrate her retirement and that was to go on a cruise. Not 4 days after they came home in the beginning of May my dad was rushed to the hospital via ambulance due to having difficulties breathing. Thinking it was just another COPE flair up, turns out to be much worse. The doctors did an x-ray and noticed something, they wanted to do a CAT scan just to be sure. Two minutes after the CAT scan the ED doc comes in and says, "you have a mass on your lung, we are going to admit you and run some more tests." The following morning, dad's lung doctor comes in and shortly after the cancer doctor follows with the news no one wanted to hear. That my dad had a 3 to 4 inch mass on his lung that had the looks of cancer. Dad, already having a hard time breathing, is being told the only way to know for sure is that a biopsy was needed. Due to dad’s issue, the biopsy that the cancer doctor wanted to do wasn’t an option and the basic option was the only way. 2 weeks later, still in the hospital dad was just becoming more weak as the days went by. May 13th 2023 was the day of confirmation, dad had cancer.. Unknown what type, where it started, and how we need to follow through with treatment. On Mothers day dad finally got to come home but not the way he would have wanted. Now dad needs to use a walker and have oxygen on a daily basis. Doctor appointment after doctor appointment, dad finally gets to be able to have the biopsy they wanted to do to break down more details of the cancer. What was supposed to be a 2 day stay turned into a week stay, in and out of ICU due to complications, 2 chest tubes later, and a lot of delusion. Scariest day was when dad didn’t know who mom was. Upon discharge dad was able to sleep and get off some of the medications they had him on in the hospital and dad’s memory came back slowly. Thanks to one of my moms old co-workers, Dr. O, we were able to have the best thoracic surgeons working on dad. However, the results came back still inconclusive, just the cancer was officially cancer. Thankfully the cancer hasn’t spread anywhere else but the doctor wanted to start him on chemotherapy as soon as possible. June 21st was round 1 of 3 straight days of treatment and then 3 weeks off. As of now, dad has to do 4 total rounds (12 treatments) until we can re-evaluate. When that day came, we learned that chemotherapy wasn’t working and that we could try immunotherapy. 3 rounds later it was time to re-evaluate, again received news we didn’t want to hear, treatment wasn’t working. At the start of all this radiation wasn’t an option, however, it’s now our only option. We met with the radiologist and this could work but could create side effects of inflammation of the lungs, difficulty breathing, and difficulty swallowing. Right now dad has basically one working lung, but that one lung has a mass on it. It’s now shifting and putting pressure on his esophagus and making it difficult for him to talk. Watching the strongest man you know digress isn’t easy. On January 5th, dad spoke to my sister Erica and asked her to come speak with me. He asked us to talk to mom and let her know that dad has made the choice to no longer continue treatment and asked for us to put him in hospice. The family is going to respect his wishes and let him go peacefully.

I’m sure as you might know, medical bills, hospice, and funeral care can pile up. My sister and I don’t want my mom to have to worry about anything but to be with our dad whom they have shared 50 plus years of marriage and 5 years of dating together.

We just want to express our gratitude for everyone who has known and loved our father and whom of those we know will help. My sister and I are note the ones to ask for money but we are asking for those who loved him, if you can, help this become an easier decision for our family.