I’m writing a book. On resilience. This isn’t it, but it might seem like it OMG it’s long, Just give me a chance, please.. I have started and contributed to a lot of GoFundMe pages in my relatively short years. My only request is you give me a few minutes of your time. This feels weird. It feels surreal. It feels like something I never thought I would be doing. But alas, that’s life. Cue Frank Sinatra, or something I’m pretty sure.

Tim and I have been married for almost five years. We have always known we wanted children. Ask anyone who knows Tim and they would likely tell you Tim is the most amazing person EVER with kids. He is amazing with not only his nieces and nephews, but also all the children he works with at the Central Institute For The Deaf(WashU). He changes their moods, their smiles, and their day in just moments.

I love babies. More than most things. I love the way they make cute little noises. I love seeing their personalities come to life. When they become toddlers, I don’t really even know what to do because they are foreign little creatures to me. When they hit about 5 yrs old, I again can relate and I feel like I get to relive a little of my childhood every time I’m around them.

Tim and I have always known we would adopt. In our early stages of dating, we discussed it. It’s not our “plan B.” We just have always felt there are so many babies in the world who need great homes and we could provide.

The last six months of our lives have been challenging, to say the least. My father somehow miraculously survived a less than 3% survival rate for a condition that is nearly always fatal and did so without deficits. During that time, I got on my knees and prayed to God for the first and only time in my life. I had some weird strength given to me that I am just now starting to process. He also officially got his “all clear” yesterday to resume any activity he wants to do. I changed jobs, which was nothing short of a blessing but also unexpected and a stressor as it always is.

Tim and I are ready to adopt. I feel like if I were reading this, my first thought would be...don’t you make enough money to do this on your own? I’m a nurse practitioner and Tim is an IT manager. Yes, we make decent salaries. However, the cost of adopting a baby these days often goes upwards of 100K with legal fees, birth mother healthcare concerns, and marketing. It provides a dizziness of reality I have never expected.

We can take a personal loan out. That would cost us about a third mortgage payment per month (in addition to our usual mortgage and my super cool high student loans).

I don’t want to get bogged down with those details. I have been praying for weeks and literally all day today before we met with a friend of the family who is involved in this type of stuff to be given a clear answer, because to be honest, I’m tired. We are tired. I want to know the direction to go and how to go about it. We met with her and I cried my eyes out, we prayed with her and she prayed over us. She suggested we set this up.

If you know me well, I hope you know my heart. We want a child by adoption. This has been an intensely emotional experience. We feel God has led us to this point and that if it is His will, the financial stuff will be provided. I’m not asking for handouts, I’m asking for you to help us to achieve our dream of adopting a baby(or babies). If you don’t believe in God and you haven’t watched or heard our story, I encourage you to watch it unfold, because although I am SO emotional, I know that the plan is beautiful and you will see it. And then you can read my book (jk, I’m probably super boring to read about). Anything you contribute will be sent to a separate account we have set up for adoption. If for some reason that doesn’t go through, you will be refunded anything you contribute. I truly believe if this is what we are meant to do, God will provide the funds.

I personally believe that if this is God’s will for us, we will see if it is.

Even if you’re just my Facebook friend, thanks for reading all of this. Thanks for being here. Thanks, period.

All my love,

Julie

Ephesians 3:20 Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us.

PS. Guys, I want to start my nursery.