Kelly Merryman Burial and Casket
Donation protected
KELLY JUNE MERRYMAN born 06/03/1981 died 03/16/2016
Kelly's final words:
"I killed the only thing I ever loved; Why do I wonder if she is really dead? All of my life it's been the stories you tell that have guided me to this mental hell. It's not as though I always questioned myself. But what kind of love is determined to take my mental health? One of the worst, abusive relationships I have seen: All of you against just one of me. If I have to die to escape your grip, it's a small price to pay for my eternal rest. Abandoning everything, I ever called home, but at least in my choosing my time of death, I can call this story the only one that I own.
Kelly Merryman's Facebook Page:
"Pastor Rick Warren — 5 star
over a year ago
The only page I check out first every time I get on Facebook. Pastor Rick, your goodness is infectious and i want to catch it!" Kelly Merryman
Inbox
Jennifer Merryman
4:22 AM (20 hours ago)
A beloved sister, so wrought with pain, so bewildered, depressed, and alone in life tied a noose to a handicap bar in a bathroom stall and fell face forward into it and allowed herself to pass out and eventually suffocate in a public restroom in a tiny stall at 11:00 a.m. this morning. She was not found until 1:30p.m. and by that time, she was on the floor next to the drain where her young beautiful life lay wet and lifeless on the floor.
Kelly finally gave up hope of ever being loved and decided to end her life. I love and miss my sister deeply. She was funny, full of energy, kind-hearted and beautiful. I miss having her in my life or hearing her call me "Jennipur" like she did when she was three, as she walked around the house sucking her middle finger with her favorite blanket in tow, speech impediment in hand.
Kelly June Merryman was 34 years old when she hung herself. Looking at her big blue eyes and pale face, you can only imagine how much hope for a good life there was for her. We all believed in her, so much beauty begs so much from a wounded girl. I don't think my sister ever knew how valuable she was, or how dearly loved she was.
I want her to know how much I love her, and how much I always will. I never thought the day would come when she would be gone, and I had hoped it would be in my old age, but I lost her today in a public bathroom, in the handicapp stall where she hung herself with a striped shirt, and I miss her, and I love her so much, and I wish I could tell her how much she meant to me, and how much I always loved her and I always will.
Kelly, I want you to know, I love you so much, and I am so sorry I couldn't be your friend or someone you liked to be around. I am so sorry for all the times you were scared and lonely, and sick and in a Hell you couldn't escape from. I miss you so much, I miss you not being happy and well, and feeling safe, and getting tucked in and having a loving family, and getting homework done, and brushing your teeth, and knowing the goodness of God, and experiencing holiness in your life, and being a mother. Everything God gave you that was good and yours, Satan took away from you, and turned into something evil.
I want you back, I want to see you now as an overcomer, Death where is your sting? I want you seated with the Lord Jesus Christ on his throan of righteousness. May you reign with him, meet your daughter, meet your niece, Gracie, and be and have all the beauty you were meant to. I love you so much. Please be okay, I need you to be okay, I need your story to continue happily, I need to know you are safe and well and taken care of. Please know how much I love you, and how sorry I am not to have given you more in this life, not to have given my all. I'm so sorry Kelly. I love you, you were/are loved by so many people, and I know I will see you again and meet my beloved niece when I see and hold my Gracie again. So think of a good name, oh wait I think I know what you would have named your daughter-Penelope. I know another beautiful name: K-E-L-L-Y. All my love, my beauty, my heart, my very treasured and most beloved sister, rest in peace.
Jennipur
Alistair Merryman
3:05 PM (9 hours ago)
to me
Hi Jenny,
I've cried a lot today, I've been angry, sad, laughing, and praying. The sadness and grief seem to come in waves and just let them roll over with each emotional swell I take comfort in these pictures and the work of God in Kelly's life and His wisdom in calling her home where she could finally feel and know the love that she desired and was always destined for.
It looks like she beat us to the gushy greens.
Love you,
Alistair
"Hello Ms. Merryman, it's Peter Baca. I'm soo sorry. I feel a large loss that will never be filled again. Despite how our relationship turned out (Kelly & Myself), I have always carried her in my heart, I have always been concerned about her livelihood, regardless of how much Kelly allowed me to be a part of it. I hope you and your family are processing all this, as healthy as possible. Remember what has and always will remain with all of us who knew her...OUR LOVE. She was beautiful in soo many ways. I send my condolences to all of you. Please call if you should have any questions for me...God bless." Peter Baca
Marika Wade:
"My friend earned her angel wings yesterday...she will never be forgotten & will never leave our hearts! We love you Kelly...all of us are so sad to lose you here on earth! You were so beautiful....funny....truly "One of a kind"....I wish you were still here with us....over the past couple of days, I've been spending a lot of time with Kelly's family....we have cried, laughed, asked a million questions, but mostly we have cherished our memories of Kelly! Fly free my friend!!! God bless you!"
Jeremy Patapoff:
"Dear Merryman family, I'm truly stunned by your (our) loss. There are so many emotions running through my body it's almost paralyzingly. Kelly always had a place in my heart & gave me a gift she cannot take away even in her death."
For those of you who could not attend the Memorial Service, we are attaching an audio link where you can listen to it in its entirety. It captures the true essence of Kelly's life and spirit. God bless all of you for showing your support and love and for pouring out your prayers, your funds, your time and thoughts to honor this beautiful spirit, Kelly June Merryman.
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2sB8VXg5BIwdXUtRlJaemhIUW8
I didn't know Kelly directly, only through her Mom, Jeannette. I do know how much she was loved by her family here on earth and now her Heavenly Father is continuing to provide her with everlasting love. May you be comforted knowing she is with our Father in Heaven and you will see her again. Sending my deepest sympathy for your loss and all my prayers for God to comfort
you.
Marie Silva - March 22 at 07:49 AM
I will never forget how loving and sweet Kelly was! She could light up a room with a smile! She helped me some much with my children when they were little! She was a true friend and I will always miss her!
kathy galvin - Yesterday at 02:34 PM
Kelly I will miss you everyday! You came over to hang out with Symm when my kids where little. Little did you know that you touched our hearts... When CPS came and took the kids... You were there in a heartbeat. You were ready to fight along with me because of how wrong they were! So was your father! You came and wrapped you arms around me telling me that it will be OK! Kelly the kids are grown now! But I still remember how you were hurting along with me! I have not diven myself the time to greave over loosing your kind loving heart because I don't want to let you go! I keepa saying everyever where you have earned you wings already! And i know you did years before you needed them!
Danielle Olsowski - Yesterday at 06:53 AM
When Kelly was little, she used to suck her finger and walk around with her favorite blanket that had a satin trim. She was always rubbing that satin blanket, sucking her finger and calling out for me, "Jennipur", she used to say. My beautiful Kelly. I love you...Jennipur
Jennifer Merryman - March 22 at 03:51 AM
Kelly was my friend God brought her to me years ago and put her in strategic places throughout the years so when needed I could be reminded I wasn't alone I had people who loved me oh how I wish he would have placed me in that bathroom so I could have offered her a smile and a hug and been her friend. Now I can only pray she lives on in the memories of all who loved her
Stephanie Artiano - Yesterday at 08:45 PM
There are so many wonderful moments: Atari in sneakers; "Don't stand up in a Ramv"; those faces; Del Mar; I wish yoiu would have let me in; I love you so much Kelly. God Speed.
Frank Petermann
When Kelly was little, she used to suck her finger and walk around with her favorite blanket that had a satin trim. She was always rubbing that satin blanket, sucking her finger and calling out for me, "Jennipur", she used to say. My beautiful Kelly. I love you...Jennipur
Jennifer Merryman - March 22 at 03:51 AM
Kelly was my friend God brought her to me years ago and put her in strategic places throughout the years so when needed I could be reminded I wasn't alone I had people who loved me oh how I wish he would have placed me in that bathroom so I could have offered her a smile and a hug and been her friend. Now I can only pray she lives on in the memories of all who loved her
Stephanie Artiano - Yesterday at 08:45 PM
"Kelly, your smile was captivating and your laughter so full of life and love. I only wish I could have known you longer, you left us all too early. I know you are in a much better place now, may you rest in eternal peace."
Anonymous
"Kelly was always so conscientious of others who were suffering, when she was 18, she made me go to the Red Cross with her and donate my platelets. Kelly signed herself up for just about every registry you can think of to be a donor, if she was a match. Years later I met a woman, who needed those platelet treatments to stay alive, and she told me, "God bless you for donating", but really it was Kelly's blessing, who cared enough to give, whatever she had, and then try to get everyone else she knew to do the same." Jennifer Merryman
"When we were little we all lived in Las Vegas, Nevada, and there was nothing but long stretches of highway and open road back then. My dad would often let us sit in his lap and practice driving, and was always quick to remind me that he had his first driver's license when he was 14 years old. Al tried hard to be a good drive, I tried hardly at all, and Kelly for the sheer fun and enjoyment of it, tried to kill us all. Her favorite thing to do was take the wheel and turn it sharp left and then right and then all over the place, she would laugh and giggle and squeal with delight, and my mom would scream, "Larry, really, this is dangerous. Kelly was fearless, tenacious and full of life. I don't want to miss her, I want to remember everything about her and keep her close. Jennifer"
Best fun memory ever was of Kelly and I tormenting Ron, our step-dad in the car with a song by Whitesnake: "Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone"
Kelly and I made solemn vows to Ron that the lyric was "grifter" and not "drifter". Even though Ron, who was a Stanford graduate, took great pains to explain it was "drifter", he got into the Latin and origins of words and tried to tell us there was no such word as "grifter". We blasted that song and sang it over and over again as "grifter", as loud and as many times as we could to the brink of Ron's sanity. I don't think we ever laughed so hard or long in the car over that; eventually we got Ron singing "grifter" too, so much for Stanford! He had to join us, there was no beating Kelly and I, we were a formidable match!"
Jennifer Merryman
Dear Friends,
Where to begin...what words could we share that would be full enough with the love each of you showed for Kelly by donating, praying, calling, showing up and allowing Kelly to touch your hearts with love, as she so fully filled ours.
This journey from life to death has been soo painful. It was a near impossible task to let go of one so close to life and so very dear to each of us.
Thanks to everyone's fundraising efforts we were able to present a check to O'Connor's Mortuary for $6,000.00 in honor of Kelly, and the loving way they handled her final care with dignity, respect and gentleness-all things we wanted for Kelly, particularly, because of the anonymous and painful manner in which she left her home for eternity.
As we waited for Kelly's cremation to schedule, we had several days that we were able to visit with her, spend time tending to her and listening to music that stayed with us during the silence. It was a time of preparation for saying goodbye, and we were comforted by her presence. These moments were priceless. Today, March 29, 2016, Kelly was cremated at 10:00 a.m. and we spread her ashes by 5:00 p.m. at the feet of Calvary on a holy mountain where Kelly had found peace and eternal life.
She is now our very own guardian angel with much work to do (we keep her busy), and we can say with certainty that Kelly lives, Kelly's spirit is at peace, her ashes spread at the feet of Jesus, and our hearts and minds comforted by the great future hope of eternal life, and our chance to be reunited with her.
Thank you for all of the love, the prayers and the memories you shared of our precious gift: Kelly June Merryman. She is at home in our hearts--forever.
A daugher, a sister, a friend.
Kelly June Merryman
06/03/1981-03/16/2016.
Jeannette & Jennifer Merryman.
Kelly's final words:
"I killed the only thing I ever loved; Why do I wonder if she is really dead? All of my life it's been the stories you tell that have guided me to this mental hell. It's not as though I always questioned myself. But what kind of love is determined to take my mental health? One of the worst, abusive relationships I have seen: All of you against just one of me. If I have to die to escape your grip, it's a small price to pay for my eternal rest. Abandoning everything, I ever called home, but at least in my choosing my time of death, I can call this story the only one that I own.
Kelly Merryman's Facebook Page:
"Pastor Rick Warren — 5 star
over a year ago
The only page I check out first every time I get on Facebook. Pastor Rick, your goodness is infectious and i want to catch it!" Kelly Merryman
Inbox
Jennifer Merryman
4:22 AM (20 hours ago)
A beloved sister, so wrought with pain, so bewildered, depressed, and alone in life tied a noose to a handicap bar in a bathroom stall and fell face forward into it and allowed herself to pass out and eventually suffocate in a public restroom in a tiny stall at 11:00 a.m. this morning. She was not found until 1:30p.m. and by that time, she was on the floor next to the drain where her young beautiful life lay wet and lifeless on the floor.
Kelly finally gave up hope of ever being loved and decided to end her life. I love and miss my sister deeply. She was funny, full of energy, kind-hearted and beautiful. I miss having her in my life or hearing her call me "Jennipur" like she did when she was three, as she walked around the house sucking her middle finger with her favorite blanket in tow, speech impediment in hand.
Kelly June Merryman was 34 years old when she hung herself. Looking at her big blue eyes and pale face, you can only imagine how much hope for a good life there was for her. We all believed in her, so much beauty begs so much from a wounded girl. I don't think my sister ever knew how valuable she was, or how dearly loved she was.
I want her to know how much I love her, and how much I always will. I never thought the day would come when she would be gone, and I had hoped it would be in my old age, but I lost her today in a public bathroom, in the handicapp stall where she hung herself with a striped shirt, and I miss her, and I love her so much, and I wish I could tell her how much she meant to me, and how much I always loved her and I always will.
Kelly, I want you to know, I love you so much, and I am so sorry I couldn't be your friend or someone you liked to be around. I am so sorry for all the times you were scared and lonely, and sick and in a Hell you couldn't escape from. I miss you so much, I miss you not being happy and well, and feeling safe, and getting tucked in and having a loving family, and getting homework done, and brushing your teeth, and knowing the goodness of God, and experiencing holiness in your life, and being a mother. Everything God gave you that was good and yours, Satan took away from you, and turned into something evil.
I want you back, I want to see you now as an overcomer, Death where is your sting? I want you seated with the Lord Jesus Christ on his throan of righteousness. May you reign with him, meet your daughter, meet your niece, Gracie, and be and have all the beauty you were meant to. I love you so much. Please be okay, I need you to be okay, I need your story to continue happily, I need to know you are safe and well and taken care of. Please know how much I love you, and how sorry I am not to have given you more in this life, not to have given my all. I'm so sorry Kelly. I love you, you were/are loved by so many people, and I know I will see you again and meet my beloved niece when I see and hold my Gracie again. So think of a good name, oh wait I think I know what you would have named your daughter-Penelope. I know another beautiful name: K-E-L-L-Y. All my love, my beauty, my heart, my very treasured and most beloved sister, rest in peace.
Jennipur
Alistair Merryman
3:05 PM (9 hours ago)
to me
Hi Jenny,
I've cried a lot today, I've been angry, sad, laughing, and praying. The sadness and grief seem to come in waves and just let them roll over with each emotional swell I take comfort in these pictures and the work of God in Kelly's life and His wisdom in calling her home where she could finally feel and know the love that she desired and was always destined for.
It looks like she beat us to the gushy greens.
Love you,
Alistair
"Hello Ms. Merryman, it's Peter Baca. I'm soo sorry. I feel a large loss that will never be filled again. Despite how our relationship turned out (Kelly & Myself), I have always carried her in my heart, I have always been concerned about her livelihood, regardless of how much Kelly allowed me to be a part of it. I hope you and your family are processing all this, as healthy as possible. Remember what has and always will remain with all of us who knew her...OUR LOVE. She was beautiful in soo many ways. I send my condolences to all of you. Please call if you should have any questions for me...God bless." Peter Baca
Marika Wade:
"My friend earned her angel wings yesterday...she will never be forgotten & will never leave our hearts! We love you Kelly...all of us are so sad to lose you here on earth! You were so beautiful....funny....truly "One of a kind"....I wish you were still here with us....over the past couple of days, I've been spending a lot of time with Kelly's family....we have cried, laughed, asked a million questions, but mostly we have cherished our memories of Kelly! Fly free my friend!!! God bless you!"
Jeremy Patapoff:
"Dear Merryman family, I'm truly stunned by your (our) loss. There are so many emotions running through my body it's almost paralyzingly. Kelly always had a place in my heart & gave me a gift she cannot take away even in her death."
For those of you who could not attend the Memorial Service, we are attaching an audio link where you can listen to it in its entirety. It captures the true essence of Kelly's life and spirit. God bless all of you for showing your support and love and for pouring out your prayers, your funds, your time and thoughts to honor this beautiful spirit, Kelly June Merryman.
https://drive.google.com/open?id=0B2sB8VXg5BIwdXUtRlJaemhIUW8
I didn't know Kelly directly, only through her Mom, Jeannette. I do know how much she was loved by her family here on earth and now her Heavenly Father is continuing to provide her with everlasting love. May you be comforted knowing she is with our Father in Heaven and you will see her again. Sending my deepest sympathy for your loss and all my prayers for God to comfort
you.
Marie Silva - March 22 at 07:49 AM
I will never forget how loving and sweet Kelly was! She could light up a room with a smile! She helped me some much with my children when they were little! She was a true friend and I will always miss her!
kathy galvin - Yesterday at 02:34 PM
Kelly I will miss you everyday! You came over to hang out with Symm when my kids where little. Little did you know that you touched our hearts... When CPS came and took the kids... You were there in a heartbeat. You were ready to fight along with me because of how wrong they were! So was your father! You came and wrapped you arms around me telling me that it will be OK! Kelly the kids are grown now! But I still remember how you were hurting along with me! I have not diven myself the time to greave over loosing your kind loving heart because I don't want to let you go! I keepa saying everyever where you have earned you wings already! And i know you did years before you needed them!
Danielle Olsowski - Yesterday at 06:53 AM
When Kelly was little, she used to suck her finger and walk around with her favorite blanket that had a satin trim. She was always rubbing that satin blanket, sucking her finger and calling out for me, "Jennipur", she used to say. My beautiful Kelly. I love you...Jennipur
Jennifer Merryman - March 22 at 03:51 AM
Kelly was my friend God brought her to me years ago and put her in strategic places throughout the years so when needed I could be reminded I wasn't alone I had people who loved me oh how I wish he would have placed me in that bathroom so I could have offered her a smile and a hug and been her friend. Now I can only pray she lives on in the memories of all who loved her
Stephanie Artiano - Yesterday at 08:45 PM
There are so many wonderful moments: Atari in sneakers; "Don't stand up in a Ramv"; those faces; Del Mar; I wish yoiu would have let me in; I love you so much Kelly. God Speed.
Frank Petermann
When Kelly was little, she used to suck her finger and walk around with her favorite blanket that had a satin trim. She was always rubbing that satin blanket, sucking her finger and calling out for me, "Jennipur", she used to say. My beautiful Kelly. I love you...Jennipur
Jennifer Merryman - March 22 at 03:51 AM
Kelly was my friend God brought her to me years ago and put her in strategic places throughout the years so when needed I could be reminded I wasn't alone I had people who loved me oh how I wish he would have placed me in that bathroom so I could have offered her a smile and a hug and been her friend. Now I can only pray she lives on in the memories of all who loved her
Stephanie Artiano - Yesterday at 08:45 PM
"Kelly, your smile was captivating and your laughter so full of life and love. I only wish I could have known you longer, you left us all too early. I know you are in a much better place now, may you rest in eternal peace."
Anonymous
"Kelly was always so conscientious of others who were suffering, when she was 18, she made me go to the Red Cross with her and donate my platelets. Kelly signed herself up for just about every registry you can think of to be a donor, if she was a match. Years later I met a woman, who needed those platelet treatments to stay alive, and she told me, "God bless you for donating", but really it was Kelly's blessing, who cared enough to give, whatever she had, and then try to get everyone else she knew to do the same." Jennifer Merryman
"When we were little we all lived in Las Vegas, Nevada, and there was nothing but long stretches of highway and open road back then. My dad would often let us sit in his lap and practice driving, and was always quick to remind me that he had his first driver's license when he was 14 years old. Al tried hard to be a good drive, I tried hardly at all, and Kelly for the sheer fun and enjoyment of it, tried to kill us all. Her favorite thing to do was take the wheel and turn it sharp left and then right and then all over the place, she would laugh and giggle and squeal with delight, and my mom would scream, "Larry, really, this is dangerous. Kelly was fearless, tenacious and full of life. I don't want to miss her, I want to remember everything about her and keep her close. Jennifer"
Best fun memory ever was of Kelly and I tormenting Ron, our step-dad in the car with a song by Whitesnake: "Here I go again on my own
Goin' down the only road I've ever known
Like a drifter I was born to walk alone"
Kelly and I made solemn vows to Ron that the lyric was "grifter" and not "drifter". Even though Ron, who was a Stanford graduate, took great pains to explain it was "drifter", he got into the Latin and origins of words and tried to tell us there was no such word as "grifter". We blasted that song and sang it over and over again as "grifter", as loud and as many times as we could to the brink of Ron's sanity. I don't think we ever laughed so hard or long in the car over that; eventually we got Ron singing "grifter" too, so much for Stanford! He had to join us, there was no beating Kelly and I, we were a formidable match!"
Jennifer Merryman
Dear Friends,
Where to begin...what words could we share that would be full enough with the love each of you showed for Kelly by donating, praying, calling, showing up and allowing Kelly to touch your hearts with love, as she so fully filled ours.
This journey from life to death has been soo painful. It was a near impossible task to let go of one so close to life and so very dear to each of us.
Thanks to everyone's fundraising efforts we were able to present a check to O'Connor's Mortuary for $6,000.00 in honor of Kelly, and the loving way they handled her final care with dignity, respect and gentleness-all things we wanted for Kelly, particularly, because of the anonymous and painful manner in which she left her home for eternity.
As we waited for Kelly's cremation to schedule, we had several days that we were able to visit with her, spend time tending to her and listening to music that stayed with us during the silence. It was a time of preparation for saying goodbye, and we were comforted by her presence. These moments were priceless. Today, March 29, 2016, Kelly was cremated at 10:00 a.m. and we spread her ashes by 5:00 p.m. at the feet of Calvary on a holy mountain where Kelly had found peace and eternal life.
She is now our very own guardian angel with much work to do (we keep her busy), and we can say with certainty that Kelly lives, Kelly's spirit is at peace, her ashes spread at the feet of Jesus, and our hearts and minds comforted by the great future hope of eternal life, and our chance to be reunited with her.
Thank you for all of the love, the prayers and the memories you shared of our precious gift: Kelly June Merryman. She is at home in our hearts--forever.
A daugher, a sister, a friend.
Kelly June Merryman
06/03/1981-03/16/2016.
Jeannette & Jennifer Merryman.
Organizer
Jeannette Merryman
Organizer
Aliso Viejo, CA