Vickie Lee Collins

My mother, Vickie Collins passed away in her sleep at age 55, this past Tuesday. I am next of kin and unfortunately cannot make it to her home state of Maryland until this Sunday. I have a meeting set up with the funeral home I had her transported to in Salisbury MD from Baltimore MD. I have to identify her before we can proceed forward, so at this time I do not have information on a service that many have asked for. How I proceed kind of depends on what I can raise. I knew my mom wasn't of the greatest health, but I always thought she'd outlive us all since she already lived thru so much that should have killed her, but she always made it out kicking. I definitely didn't think it would be this soon, even though she warned me. I didn't want to believe it.

Anyone that knew my mother knew she was a force to be reckoned with. I don't think she's ever crossed paths with anyone and didn't leave a lasting impression, whether it be good or bad. She really didn't give a shit what anyone thought, like at all. It could be embarrassing at times, but now I admire her fearlessness. Our relationship wasn't always the best, you could say tumultuous at times. We went thru a lot together and I admit, I spent half my life focusing on all the bad, and distanced myself as much as I could after she moved away. Something I regret now. I never once told her I forgave her, even though her countless apologies. She always told me how much she loved me, and how I was the greatest thing she ever did in life. She never tried to dull my shine and let me express myself completely. She was brutally honest with me about drugs and her addictions and afflictions very early on. I got to see things first hand I don't wish on anyone, but I also appreciate it because it taught me literally what not to do. Even with all the bull shit, I can say I was never out in foster care or with anyone that didn't love me and care for me like I was their own. I was always clothed, fed, and warm. Before I was 10 years old I had already been to and seen most of this fine country. I've been to the Bahamas and Cayman Islands more times than I can count on my two hands. Literally the most amazing things I've done in my life beyond my children were indeed with my mother. And the times we were apart she'd always make sure I knew she was with me. She'd be thousands of miles away but still call local radio stations to me to have them play "I'll stand by you" by The Pretenders and call whoever I was with to tune in so I could hear her song to me. When she was in jail I'd get letters just about every other day, sometimes they'd be as simple as making sure I'm brushing my teeth, but I don't think I wrote her back but once maybe twice. When we went to visit this summer she brought it up. We called jail "college", but she talked about her letters and writing me was all she could think about doing, and she said "I'm sure you don't have those anymore". Imagine her shock when I told her I indeed do have them all, in order, in a binder. I think that was the first time in the last 18 years that I gave her hope that I did actually care about her. I've been really shitty and TBH this is like my last chance to show her I do love her and I do care. I don't care if no one even shows up, I just want to do something nice for her for once. Regardless I'm already on the hook for transporting her from Baltimore to her home city. She wanted to be cremated, so even if I gotta sell booty hole pictures on OF, I'm going to get this done. I'd rather not sell pictures tho so that's where you come in. I would like to have a service and honestly the price difference to add a service isn't that much vs without the service. I'd of course do a celebration of life type party here in Michigan, for my friends, she loved so many of you.

Scott is my mom's boyfriend of the past 18 years. 18 years folks, I don't think anyone besides (maybeee) my grandmother (Gran/Kathy) has put in that many years side by side with my mom. I don't want to burden him with a single thing and hope that I am able to help him out. I don't know how he's going to do without my mom, I'm so scared for him and his health isn't great as well, I don't want any added stress on him.

If you've made it this far, thanks for reading, and sorry if I rambled/shared too much. IDK how all this works and it feels super awkward.

I am also sorry for not replying to all messages and calls, I will when I'm a little more focused. I appreciate you all, and there are many.

Please if you can, donate and or share.

I love and appreciate you all