Friends of the Farmers

In the six years since the Farmer family has been on the journey no one ever wants to be on—that of living day to day with an advanced-staged cancer diagnosis—the resounding refrain from those around them has been ‘How can we help?'

Over the years that inquiry has translated to meals and messages of encouragement from far and wide that helped the family feel loved and supported while they went on about the business of living with cancer. No gesture, however small, went unnoticed.

If you are reading this, you probably know and love Ryan, Finn, Nora and Jen—or feel like you do. You’ve probably experienced Ryan’s self-effacing sentimentality and flawlessly timed dad jokes. Finn’s passionate loyalty to both his pastimes and his people. Nora’s unbridled, joyous, energy. Jen’s knack for effortlessly connecting with others and putting them at ease.

When asked how she is, Jen will inevitably say ‘fine and how are YOU?', always shifting the conversation back to the ordinary details of others’ lives. She’ll ask about that vacation you just posted about, where you got your sweater or what happened at your kids’ tournament last weekend. It feels so ridiculous at the moment—how could she possibly care about a sweater at a time like this?!—but it is her way. The family, friends, and colleagues closest to her have seen her maneuver the changing treatment regimens, the ugly sides of her diagnosis and its impact on their family, and lifestyle and dietary changes that would have most of us throwing in the towel. But no matter what, she keeps going, doing whatever it takes to buy her more time with the people she loves most.

It is the deep understanding of what living with cancer is like that led Jen to loudly and proudly champion so many St. Louis causes dedicated to helping others in her family’s situation, including Pedal the Cause, Camp Kesem and Pink Ribbon Girls (just to name a few). Jen unapologetically used her voice and her platform—and on many occasions an energy reserve she shouldn’t have been capable of—to raise tens of thousands—if not hundreds of thousands—of dollars for cancer care and research.

It's time for those that love the Farmer family to ask themselves ‘How can we help?’ once again. While the details and outcomes of every single cancer diagnosis are different, there is an unfortunate commonality for everyone who walks this path—it’s expensive. The financial burden of cancer is undeniable and extends far beyond the hard costs of the treatment itself. It cruelly co-exists with all of life’s other financial responsibilities. Life goes on, no matter what’s happening in the background.

If you’ve rooted for Ryan, Jen, Nora and Finn over the last six years, or have known and loved another family that has experienced a similar struggle, consider making a donation and sharing this effort with others. If you’ve ever caught her contagious laughter on the radio, been supported by a cause she cares about or just seen her face light up when you tell her a story, consider this a small way to say thank you and make sure she and Ryan and the kids feel the love we know our community shares for their family.

Jen’s appetite for more—more joy, more life, more time, more options, is why we’re doing this. Every dollar raised will support the Farmer family today and tomorrow. To offer them the blessing of one less thing to worry about as they navigate this next chapter. To pursue any future medical treatment available. To be together. To have fun. To, in the face of uncertainty, keep their resolve high and keep their lives moving ever forward.